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@ -8,3 +8,4 @@ A very serious look at [horses in philosophy](./horse).
A [random short story prompt](./prompt/). A [random short story prompt](./prompt/).
Archive of [Lexicon games](./lexicon/).

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<title>Battle of Quillian Square | Lexicon Alpha</title>
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<p><span style="font-size:1.5em;">Lexicon Alpha</span></p>
<p>
<a href="../contents/">Contents</a> &mdash;
<a href="../rules/">Rules</a> &mdash;
<a href="../formatting/">Formatting</a> &mdash;
<a href="../session/">Session</a> &mdash;
<a href="../statistics/">Statistics</a>
</p>
<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>Battle of Quillian Square</h1>
<p>Quillian Square: birthplace of the "Sloppy Joe" and hometown of military
general Septimus the Eighth. Now a destitute nuclear wasteland, thanks to some
kids and a personal grudge. Since I don't get paid enough to cover any of the
important battles, I'll take the opportunity to set the facts straight on what
did and did not happen in the Battle of Quillian Square.</p>
<p><b>What happened?</b></p>
<p>• The square was ransacked by a group of mechanized infants known as the <a href="Kindergarten_Kops.html">Kindergarten Kops</a>.
It is unclear what the motive was behind the attack, but expert witness
"Sloppy" Joe believes it was a pitiful attempt to challenge
the monopoly of the Sloppy Joe on the sandwich market.</p>
<p>• The Battle of Quillian Square featured the first, and only, ever recorded use of
<a href="Gattling_ducks.html" class="phantom">gattling ducks</a> in military warfare.</p>
<p><b>What did not happen?</b></p>
<p>• First Quartile military control was <i>not</i> reduced in Quillian Square or any
surrounding area as a result of the battle.</p>
<p>• Radiation from the battle has <i>not</i> had any affect on the nutritional value of
Sloppy Joes.</p>
<p>The Battle of Quillian Square saw a great, thriving town reduced to rubble and
ruins, although sources suggest you can still purchase a Sloppy Joe from
Sloppy Joe's, only 5.99!</p>
<p><i>This article was not sponsored in any way by Sloppy Joe's Sloppy Joe sandwiches, the official</i>
<i>sandwich of the 13th annual <a href="Quadrant_Cup.html">Quadrant Cup</a>.</i></p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>~ Khan, Alexandra</p></span>
</div>
<div class="content citeblock">
<p style="float:right"><a href="Genocide_of_the_Second_Quartile.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="World_Transfer_Agency.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="Gattling_ducks.html" class="phantom">Gattling ducks</a> | <a href="Kindergarten_Kops.html">Kindergarten Kops</a> | <a href="Quadrant_Cup.html">Quadrant Cup</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="War_of_Civil_Coherence.html">War of Civil Coherence</a> | <a href="Uriopoges_the_Wiseass.html">Uriopoges the Wiseass</a> | <a href="Order_of_the_Black_Ladder.html">Order of the Black Ladder</a> | <a href="Petrov_van_der_Deathface.html">Petrov van der Deathface</a> | <a href="Kindergarten_Kops.html">Kindergarten Kops</a></p>
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<title>Chloroveritase | Lexicon Alpha</title>
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<p><span style="font-size:1.5em;">Lexicon Alpha</span></p>
<p>
<a href="../contents/">Contents</a> &mdash;
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<a href="../formatting/">Formatting</a> &mdash;
<a href="../session/">Session</a> &mdash;
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</p>
<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>Chloroveritase</h1>
<p><b>Chloroveritase</b> is a substance exuded by <a href="Gattling_ducks.html" class="phantom">gattling ducks</a> during weapon discharge. Despite its humble origins as a byproduct of avian assault troops, chloroveritase has become an immensely important substance due to its curious ability to make things see-through. It sees use by the <a href="World_Transfer_Agency.html">World Transfer Agency</a> as a screening method, which has caused some controversy given that the see-through effect sometimes does not wear off, causing transferred persons grief when their clothes or skin is made permanently transparent.</p>
<p>Though <a href="Petrov_van_der_Deathface.html">Petrov van der Deathface</a>'s eponymous condition is officially attributed by the resistance to WTA malice, no known WTA procedure applies chloroveritase only to the facial skin and muscle, and so despite the popular appeal of such stories, scholars generally consider it to have been self-inflicted for political reasons.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Signed, the Right Honorable Honorius Rightson, Esq., PrR, WKD</p></span>
</div>
<div class="content citeblock">
<p style="float:right"><a href="First_Quartile.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="The_WYZZYIRD.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="Gattling_ducks.html" class="phantom">Gattling ducks</a> | <a href="Petrov_van_der_Deathface.html">Petrov van der Deathface</a> | <a href="World_Transfer_Agency.html">World Transfer Agency</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Joculus_the_Red.html">Joculus the Red</a> | <a href="World_Transfer_Agency.html">World Transfer Agency</a></p>
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<title>Circus Moon | Lexicon Alpha</title>
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<p><span style="font-size:1.5em;">Lexicon Alpha</span></p>
<p>
<a href="../contents/">Contents</a> &mdash;
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<a href="../formatting/">Formatting</a> &mdash;
<a href="../session/">Session</a> &mdash;
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</p>
<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>Circus Moon</h1>
<p>In Disquietist folk tales, the "Circus Moon" heralds the arrival of <a href="Teramince2C_Clown-God_of_Slaughter.html">Teramince</a> to the physical world. According to other myths, the light reflected from the moon itself is (by means curiously unspecified) sufficient to provide a form for Teramince's body. Accounts of the Circus Moon's appearance vary greatly, but commonly speak of a "stretching" or "warping", as if by a funhouse mirror. According to legend, its appearence is usually accompanied by corvids emitting the occasional "Wilhelm Scream."</p>
<p>Because no photographs exist of the Circus Moon and that no physical explanation has been offered for its appearance, it is clear that the Circus Moon is little more than a Disquietist fiction. Nonetheless, the tales appear to influence a great number of Disquietist traditions: even the <a href="Order_of_the_Black_Ladder.html">Order of the Black Ladder</a> will quickly assemble for an impromptu barbequeue in the event of a supposed sighting.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Ersatz Scrivener</p></span>
</div>
<div class="content citeblock">
<p style="float:right"><a href="Hand_of_Justice.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="Westexico.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="Order_of_the_Black_Ladder.html">Order of the Black Ladder</a> | <a href="Teramince2C_Clown-God_of_Slaughter.html">Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Teramince2C_Clown-God_of_Slaughter.html">Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter</a></p>
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<title>Collected Writings and Letters of Ignatius Clivowycz | Lexicon Alpha</title>
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<p><span style="font-size:1.5em;">Lexicon Alpha</span></p>
<p>
<a href="../contents/">Contents</a> &mdash;
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</p>
<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>Collected Writings and Letters of Ignatius Clivowycz</h1>
<p>The <b>Collected Writings and Letters of Ignatius Clivowycz</b> is a slim volume of content
compiled, edited, and self-published by Ignatius Clivowycz, a prominent Disquietist leader
and citizen of the <a href="First_Quartile.html">First Quartile</a>. Although presented as a compilation of his extant
writings, scholars now believe that most of the documents were written specifically for
this publication. For one, the flow and development of his arguments over the
<i>Collected Writings and Letters</i> is suspiciously coherent for a collection of ostensibly
unrelated content. For another, most of the letters are addressed to people who do not
actually exist.</p>
<p>Though undoubtedly a vanity project—it is painfully evident that Clivowycz is trying
rather too hard to seem wise—historians have found the <i>Collected Writings and Letters</i>
to be an invaluable historical resource, as Clivowycz's rambling banality belies numerous
pearls of insight into the political events in which he was involved. Most notable among
these are his description of his founding of the
<a href="The_Disquietist_22Circle_of_Fifths22_Revisited.html">Circle of Fifths</a> and his eerily accurate
prediction, not only of the <a href="Genocide_of_the_Second_Quartile.html">Genocide of the Second Quartile</a>, but of the specific
circumstances of his own death in the Genocide. Various commentators,
<a href="Petrov_van_der_Deathface.html">Petrov van der Deathface</a> among them, have observed that if Clivowycz knew he was going
to die on his ill-fated trip to the Second Quartile, he could have chosen not go. Thus,
they concluded, Clivowycz's death was probably faked to add an air of mystery to the
<i>Collected Writings and Letters</i>.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Sir Gareth, scholar-prince of Haven Rock</p></span>
</div>
<div class="content citeblock">
<p style="float:right"><a href="Lega_the_Hamhanded.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="War_of_Civil_Coherence.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="First_Quartile.html">First Quartile</a> | <a href="Genocide_of_the_Second_Quartile.html">Genocide of the Second Quartile</a> | <a href="Petrov_van_der_Deathface.html">Petrov van der Deathface</a> | <a href="The_Disquietist_22Circle_of_Fifths22_Revisited.html">The Disquietist "Circle of Fifths" Revisited</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Strontz-Mork_Fish_Trials.html">Strontz-Mork Fish Trials</a> | <a href="Hand_of_Justice.html">Hand of Justice</a> | <a href="The_Disquietist_22Circle_of_Fifths22_Revisited.html">The Disquietist "Circle of Fifths" Revisited</a></p>
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<title>Doctrine of Imbalance | Lexicon Alpha</title>
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<p><span style="font-size:1.5em;">Lexicon Alpha</span></p>
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</p>
<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>Doctrine of Imbalance</h1>
<p>The <b>Doctrine of Imbalance</b> of Uriopoges the Wiseass is one of the so-called "secret doctrines" of Remigrationism. It was unknown to Remigrationism scholarship until the recent discovery that the Five-Hundred Injunctions found in the <a href="Transactions_of_the_Clamorous_Convosembly2C_Vol._5.html"><i>Transactions</i></a> spell out an acrostic message. This was likely overlooked for so long because of the marginal nature of the <i>Transactions</i>. Initial reactions were highly skeptical -- the Injunctions are hurried marginal notes, after all -- but the improbability has convinced the field that the Doctrine is legitimate and inspired a search for other hidden doctrines in Uriopoges' writings.</p>
<p>In relation to other Remigrationist doctrines, the Doctrine of Imbalance qualifies the idea of the cycle of life to suggest that the distribution of souls in the cycle is not even, but is heavily concentrated to one side. It does not figure largely into public Remigrationist discourse, leaving the question open as to how much significance it could possibly have and raising questions about why Uriopoges went to such lengths to hide it in the <i>Transactions</i>.</p>
<p>While the tall tales of the "secret doctrines" certainly add that <i>je ne sais quoi</i> to the otherwise revolting doctrines of Remigrationism, it is in my opinion an unprofitable avenue of Remigrationist scholarship that distracts from more pressing issues, such as <a href="Honorius_Rightson.html">Rightson's</a> excellent recent essay on the proposals for a Reformed Remigrationism put forth by <a href="Joculus_the_Red.html">Joculus the Red</a> in his latest essay-length graffiti on the walls of the <a href="Mystery_District.html">Mystery District</a>.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Signed, the Right Honorable Honorius Rightson, Esq., PrR, WKD</p></span>
</div>
<div class="content citeblock">
<p style="float:right"><a href="Honorius_Rightson.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="Teramince2C_Clown-God_of_Slaughter.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="Honorius_Rightson.html">Honorius Rightson</a> | <a href="Joculus_the_Red.html">Joculus the Red</a> | <a href="Mystery_District.html">Mystery District</a> | <a href="Transactions_of_the_Clamorous_Convosembly2C_Vol._5.html">Transactions of the Clamorous Convosembly, Vol. 5</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Petrov_van_der_Deathface.html">Petrov van der Deathface</a> | <a href="God.html">God</a> | <a href="Transactions_of_the_Clamorous_Convosembly2C_Vol._5.html">Transactions of the Clamorous Convosembly, Vol. 5</a></p>
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<title>Double-Eighth Hexadecisection | Lexicon Alpha</title>
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<p><span style="font-size:1.5em;">Lexicon Alpha</span></p>
<p>
<a href="../contents/">Contents</a> &mdash;
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<a href="../formatting/">Formatting</a> &mdash;
<a href="../session/">Session</a> &mdash;
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</p>
<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>Double-Eighth Hexadecisection</h1>
<p>To some, the Double-Eighth Hexadecisection was a godsend. No longer were there
single big governments ruling over each of the four quartiles, but rather
four smaller governments in place of each original. Some argue that without this
dramatic shift, we would never have seen the fall of the infamous <a href="Joculus_the_Red.html">Joculus the Red</a>.</p>
<p>To others, the Double-Eighth Hexadecisection was the single worst piece of
legislation in the history of the quartiles since the <a href="Penultimate_Compact.html">Penultimate Compact</a>.
Originally, there was simplicity, a harmony of four governments working together
for the benefit of all. Now, there is chaos, a political frenzy that has rendered
the legislative process obsolete. Initially, some argued that the newly-created
factions such as the <a href="The_Disquietist_22Circle_of_Fifths22_Revisited.html">Circle of Fifths</a>
were radical and unorthodox. For reasons unknown, the voices of opposition have
grown quieter over the years.</p>
<p>And to a select few, the Double-Eighth Hexadecisection remains one of many
phrases impossible to say correctly on the first try.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>~ Khan, Alexandra</p></span>
</div>
<div class="content citeblock">
<p style="float:right"><a href="Joculus_the_Red.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="Penultimate_Compact.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="Joculus_the_Red.html">Joculus the Red</a> | <a href="Penultimate_Compact.html">Penultimate Compact</a> | <a href="The_Disquietist_22Circle_of_Fifths22_Revisited.html">The Disquietist "Circle of Fifths" Revisited</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="War_of_Civil_Coherence.html">War of Civil Coherence</a> | <a href="Genocide_of_the_Second_Quartile.html">Genocide of the Second Quartile</a></p>
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<p><span style="font-size:1.5em;">Lexicon Alpha</span></p>
<p>
<a href="../contents/">Contents</a> &mdash;
<a href="../rules/">Rules</a> &mdash;
<a href="../formatting/">Formatting</a> &mdash;
<a href="../session/">Session</a> &mdash;
<a href="../statistics/">Statistics</a>
</p>
<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>First Quartile</h1>
<p>The <b>First Quartile</b> is one of four Quartiles that comprise the Risible Republic. It
enjoys a somewhat advantaged position over the other three Quartiles in Republic politics.
Analysts attribute this mostly to force projection abilities: the <a href="World_Transfer_Agency.html">World Transfer Agency</a>,
based primarily in the First Quartile, has shifted significantly pro-First Quartile in
recent years. Due to the First Quartile's central position in the Republic, both
geographically and politically, it has accumulated no small amount of cultural influence
as well. This can be seen most prominently in the recent growth of Remigrationism in
Disquietist circles.</p>
<p>The national deity of the First Quartile is <a href="Teramince2C_Clown-God_of_Slaughter.html">Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter</a>. This
state of affairs has caused no small amount of consternation among the other Quartiles,
particularly over such phrases in Teramince's holy book as "Go forth among the infidels
and harvest bloodily their precious, precious organs"—a command which the First Quartile
administration officially claims is a metaphor. That said, some scholars have noted that
the waitlist for organ donations is significantly shorter in the First Quartile, even
after controlling for population and socio-economic status. The controversy is ongoing at
the time of writing.</p>
<p>The First Quartile boasts its share of notable personages. These include such figures as
spiritual leader <a href="Uriopoges_the_Wiseass.html">Uriopoges the Wiseass</a>, noted as the founder of Remigrationism; the
kickboxer known as the <a href="Hand_of_Justice.html">Hand of Justice</a>, who claims to be a prophet of Teramince; and
<a href="Petrov_van_der_Deathface.html">Petrov van der Deathface</a>, despite his attempts to eradicate all traces of his past.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Ersatz Scrivener</p></span>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="Mystery_District.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
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<p>Citations: <a href="Hand_of_Justice.html">Hand of Justice</a> | <a href="Petrov_van_der_Deathface.html">Petrov van der Deathface</a> | <a href="Teramince2C_Clown-God_of_Slaughter.html">Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter</a> | <a href="Uriopoges_the_Wiseass.html">Uriopoges the Wiseass</a> | <a href="World_Transfer_Agency.html">World Transfer Agency</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Trek_and_Remigration_of_the_Antifestivites.html">Trek and Remigration of the Antifestivites</a> | <a href="Mystery_District.html">Mystery District</a> | <a href="Penultimate_Compact.html">Penultimate Compact</a> | <a href="War_of_Civil_Coherence.html">War of Civil Coherence</a> | <a href="Petrov_van_der_Deathface.html">Petrov van der Deathface</a> | <a href="Honorius_Rightson.html">Honorius Rightson</a> | <a href="Collected_Writings_and_Letters_of_Ignatius_Clivowycz.html">Collected Writings and Letters of Ignatius Clivowycz</a> | <a href="Westexico.html">Westexico</a> | <a href="World_Transfer_Agency.html">World Transfer Agency</a></p>
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<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>Gattling ducks</h1>
<p><i>This entry hasn't been written yet.</i></p></div>
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<p>Citations: &mdash;</p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Battle_of_Quillian_Square.html">Battle of Quillian Square</a> | <a href="Chloroveritase.html">Chloroveritase</a></p>
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<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>Genocide of the Second Quartile</h1>
<p>Following the conclusion of the <a href="Double-Eighth_Hexadecisection.html">Double-Eighth Hexadecisection</a>, most
quartiles resorted to controversal means of achieving their political goals. Most shocking among them is the <b>Genocide of the Second Quartile</b>, provoked by a particularly detestable, pun-laden Disquietist fan fiction.</p>
<p>The genocide began swiftly, with the introduction of reams of paperwork into
the dwellings of anyone sporting a <a href="Nose_Ceremony.html">Red Nose</a>. Crippled
by their life-long instruction in carefree japery, the Disquietists were unable
to cope, and most passed away before the filing deadline.
<a href="Strontz-Mork_Fish_Trials.html">Subsequent experiments with fish</a> indicate that fish subjected
to life with 10kg of paperwork in their habitat tend to quickly suffocate or
die of starvation. A similar biological process is thought to be responsible
for the near extinction of the Disquietists from the second quartile.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Konrade Krunch</p></span>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="Order_of_the_Black_Ladder.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="Battle_of_Quillian_Square.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="Double-Eighth_Hexadecisection.html">Double-Eighth Hexadecisection</a> | <a href="Nose_Ceremony.html">Nose Ceremony</a> | <a href="Strontz-Mork_Fish_Trials.html">Strontz-Mork Fish Trials</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Strontz-Mork_Fish_Trials.html">Strontz-Mork Fish Trials</a> | <a href="Collected_Writings_and_Letters_of_Ignatius_Clivowycz.html">Collected Writings and Letters of Ignatius Clivowycz</a> | <a href="Hand_of_Justice.html">Hand of Justice</a> | <a href="God.html">God</a></p>
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<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>God</h1>
<p>A being known by all and agreed upon by none. Most widely known for his holy text,
the Rules page. While scholars previously believed God to be largely absent from
the workings of the world, new evidence points to his involvement in many key
events in recent times.</p>
<p>In the aftermath of the <a href="Genocide_of_the_Second_Quartile.html">Genocide of the Second Quartile</a>, graffiti has been
seen on various buildings with messages such as "God was here." It is
unclear whether God had a direct influence on the massacre, or if this is
just another attempt by <a href="Joculus_the_Red.html">Joculus the Red</a> to get revenge on God for stealing
his burrito from the office fridge.</p>
<p>God's allegiance has been debated, though evidence suggests he may lean slightly
toward Disquietism. "The First Quartile has most of the resources and power," stated
God, when questioned about the subject, "and the Disquietists, and the Order of
the Black Ladder in particular, are resisting them."</p>
<p>God has been cited numerous times as the divine inspiration for such radical works
as <a href="Uriopoges_the_Wiseass.html">Uriopoges</a>' <a href="Doctrine_of_Imbalance.html">Doctrine of Imbalance</a>, though he continues
to remain silent on these issues.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>~ Khan, Alexandra</p></span>
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<p><a href="Transactions_of_the_Clamorous_Convosembly2C_Vol._5.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="Doctrine_of_Imbalance.html">Doctrine of Imbalance</a> | <a href="Genocide_of_the_Second_Quartile.html">Genocide of the Second Quartile</a> | <a href="Joculus_the_Red.html">Joculus the Red</a> | <a href="Uriopoges_the_Wiseass.html">Uriopoges the Wiseass</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Honorius_Rightson.html">Honorius Rightson</a> | <a href="Westexico.html">Westexico</a> | <a href="Hand_of_Justice.html">Hand of Justice</a></p>
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<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>Hand of Justice</h1>
<p>My dear Jay,</p>
<p>I hope this letter finds you well as you prepare for the Thirteenth Annual <a href="Quadrant_Cup.html">Quadrant Cup</a> next month. Unfortunately, I must turn down your speaking request; my research is too pressing at this juncture to engage the week-long ceremonies of the Cup and prepare a lecture for the occasion.</p>
<p>I assume you have already read, or otherwise know about, my recent papers on the "secret doctrines" of Remigrationism. Though I cannot take your offer of a speaking engagement, if you have an afternoon to spare from your unending dispute with <a href="Lega_the_Hamhanded.html">Ms Legaria</a>, I should be ever so greatful to discuss the recent discoveries with you. We may be much closer than anticipated to uncovering what old Urion, <a href="God.html">God</a> rest his soul, knew about the <a href="Genocide_of_the_Second_Quartile.html">Genocide of the Second Quartile</a> prior to its occurrence. I have some theories I am eager to share about his relation to <a href="Collected_Writings_and_Letters_of_Ignatius_Clivowycz.html">Clivowycz</a>.</p>
<p>Please send your response to me by letter this time. I have told you several times already: I am not <a href="Teramince2C_Clown-God_of_Slaughter.html">Teramince</a>. I will not receive your response if you send it via prayer, nor will I be aware of its contents if you attach it to a carrier pigeon and toss it into a meat grinder like you did last time.</p>
<p>Your friend,</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Honorious Rightson, Esq.</p></span>
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<p>Citations: <a href="Collected_Writings_and_Letters_of_Ignatius_Clivowycz.html">Collected Writings and Letters of Ignatius Clivowycz</a> | <a href="Genocide_of_the_Second_Quartile.html">Genocide of the Second Quartile</a> | <a href="God.html">God</a> | <a href="Lega_the_Hamhanded.html">Lega the Hamhanded</a> | <a href="Quadrant_Cup.html">Quadrant Cup</a> | <a href="Teramince2C_Clown-God_of_Slaughter.html">Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Honorius_Rightson.html">Honorius Rightson</a> | <a href="Westexico.html">Westexico</a> | <a href="Lega_the_Hamhanded.html">Lega the Hamhanded</a> | <a href="First_Quartile.html">First Quartile</a></p>
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<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>Honorius Rightson</h1>
<p>The <b>Right Honorable Honorius Rightson, Esq., PrR, WKD</b> is a prominent scholar of
Disquietist history and culture. His early life was spent in the Third Quartile, but he
soon moved to the University of Haven Rock in the <a href="First_Quartile.html">First Quartile</a> to pursue a career in
scholarship. He received the degree of Practitioner of the Rock for his thesis,
"The Implications of Grammatical Irregularities in <a href="Uriopoges_the_Wiseass.html">Opogester's</a>
<a href="Transactions_of_the_Clamorous_Convosembly2C_Vol._5.html"><i>Transactions</i></a>." After
only three years of apprenticeship, he claimed the title of Wise Knower of Doctrine in
the traditional way (that is, besting his former mentor in single combat and seizing his
mentor's title), thereby gaining full professership. </p>
<p>Rightson's scholarly work of late has focused on Remigrationism as a cultural force,
particularly with respect to its impact on Disquietism. Of particular note is his work
with Jay Gubbins, the self-proclaimed prophet of
<a href="Teramince2C_Clown-God_of_Slaughter.html">Teramince</a> and self-styled <a href="Hand_of_Justice.html">Hand of Justice</a>.
Although Rightson's research was able to provide valuable insight into Remigrationism,
Gubbins's instability led him to believe that Rightson was Teramince himself.
Because of Gubbins's influence in Remigrationist circles, it is not unusual for them to
think Rightson is their <a href="God.html">god</a> in disguise, and he is often invoked in the rites
surrounding the <a href="Quadrant_Cup.html">Quadrant Cup</a>.</p>
<p>In honor of the sacrifices he has made in the line of his scholarly duties, this
Encyclopedia is dedicated to him.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Lord Gareth, scholar-tyrant of Haven Rock</p></span>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="Petrov_van_der_Deathface.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
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<p>Citations: <a href="First_Quartile.html">First Quartile</a> | <a href="God.html">God</a> | <a href="Hand_of_Justice.html">Hand of Justice</a> | <a href="Quadrant_Cup.html">Quadrant Cup</a> | <a href="Teramince2C_Clown-God_of_Slaughter.html">Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter</a> | <a href="Transactions_of_the_Clamorous_Convosembly2C_Vol._5.html">Transactions of the Clamorous Convosembly, Vol. 5</a> | <a href="Uriopoges_the_Wiseass.html">Uriopoges the Wiseass</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Doctrine_of_Imbalance.html">Doctrine of Imbalance</a> | <a href="Quadrant_Cup.html">Quadrant Cup</a></p>
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<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>Joculus the Red</h1>
<p>Joculus the Red was an influential and infamous Disquietist known principally for his fateful <a href="Nose_Ceremony.html">Nose Ceremony</a> massacre.
Even from an early age, Joculus was alarmingly incapable of differentiating jokes from savage transgressions against God and humanity alike.
Subsequent research suggests that this was likely due to accumulated exposure to trace amounts of <a href="Chloroveritase.html">chloroveritase</a> as a toddler, which provoked hypersensitivity
of his ulnar nerve. The Antifestivites vilified him, recounting his tasteless "jokes" in support of the <a href="Trek_and_Remigration_of_the_Antifestivites.html">remigration</a>.</p>
<p><i>Among his odious "pranks" gone awry:</i></p>
<p><b>-</b> Ruining the fifth <a href="Quadrant_Cup.html">Quadrant Cup</a> by substituting sugar for baking soda in the Sloppy Joe's industrial cookbook</p>
<p><b>-</b> Defusing the world's entire supply of exploding cigars</p>
<p><b>-</b> Bankrupting the First Quadrant's premier restaurant franchise by exploiting its "unlimited breadsticks" policy</p>
<p><b>-</b> Leaving an outstanding library fine unpaid</p>
<p><b>-</b> Signing his name as "Jacklus ;)" in the <a href="Order_of_the_Black_Ladder.html">Order of the Black Ladder</a> guestbook</p>
<p><b>-</b> Mixing tabs and spaces</p>
<p><b>-</b> Wearing, simultaneously, striped socks and plaid pajamas (later punishable by death in the second quartile)</p>
<p>Let us never speak of him again!</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Konrade Krunch</p></span>
<p> </p>
<p>&lt;script&gt;alert("He even placed errant script tags on unsuspecting web applications!");&lt;/script&gt;</p>
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<p>Citations: <a href="Chloroveritase.html">Chloroveritase</a> | <a href="Nose_Ceremony.html">Nose Ceremony</a> | <a href="Order_of_the_Black_Ladder.html">Order of the Black Ladder</a> | <a href="Quadrant_Cup.html">Quadrant Cup</a> | <a href="Trek_and_Remigration_of_the_Antifestivites.html">Trek and Remigration of the Antifestivites</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Trek_and_Remigration_of_the_Antifestivites.html">Trek and Remigration of the Antifestivites</a> | <a href="God.html">God</a> | <a href="Double-Eighth_Hexadecisection.html">Double-Eighth Hexadecisection</a> | <a href="The_Jocular_Revolution.html">The Jocular Revolution</a> | <a href="Nose_Ceremony.html">Nose Ceremony</a> | <a href="Doctrine_of_Imbalance.html">Doctrine of Imbalance</a> | <a href="The_WYZZYIRD.html">The WYZZYIRD</a></p>
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<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>Kindergarten Kops</h1>
<p>The paramilitary force known as the <b>Kindergerten Kops</b> was a brutal enforcement mechanism of
the Fourth Quartile. With all the power of a mechanized mercenary army and all the diplomatic
skill of a class of kindergarteners, the mech-piloting toddlers of the Kops painted a bloody
swath across the chaos of the Reformation.</p>
<p>Full specifications of the Kops' armored chassis were never released to the public, but redacted
documents detail military-grade armor protecting critical sections such as joints and the
toddler pilot. Accounts of Kop raids recount several weapon types, including tear gas grenade
launchers, flamethrowers, gatling guns, and heavy artillery. Reports indicate that their weapons
were grafted to the chassis' arms, so it is likely that there were several distinct roles within the
Kindergarten Kops that specialized chassis were designed for.</p>
<p>Eyewitness testimony reports that Kindergarten Kops led the charge at the <a href="Battle_of_Quillian_Square.html">Battle of Quillian Square</a>
that broke the resistance lines and resulted in the deaths of several opposition leaders, including
<a href="Petrov_van_der_Deathface.html">Petrov van der Deathface</a>.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Signed, the Right Honorable Honorius Rightson, Esq., PrR, WKD</p></span>
</div>
<div class="content citeblock">
<p style="float:right"><a href="Nose_Ceremony.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="The_Disquietist_22Circle_of_Fifths22_Revisited.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="Battle_of_Quillian_Square.html">Battle of Quillian Square</a> | <a href="Petrov_van_der_Deathface.html">Petrov van der Deathface</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Petrov_van_der_Deathface.html">Petrov van der Deathface</a> | <a href="Battle_of_Quillian_Square.html">Battle of Quillian Square</a> | <a href="War_of_Civil_Coherence.html">War of Civil Coherence</a> | <a href="Quadrant_Cup.html">Quadrant Cup</a></p>
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<p><span style="font-size:1.5em;">Lexicon Alpha</span></p>
<p>
<a href="../contents/">Contents</a> &mdash;
<a href="../rules/">Rules</a> &mdash;
<a href="../formatting/">Formatting</a> &mdash;
<a href="../session/">Session</a> &mdash;
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</p>
<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>Lega the Hamhanded</h1>
<p>Following the Quartile Reformation, <b>Legaria Porkins</b> saw her rise to power as the
first and current <b>elected governor of the Third Quartile</b>. If you've forgotten
that the Third Quartile even exists, that's no accident. Under Porkins'
leadership, the Third Quartile has remained absent from nearly all major Republic
conflicts.</p>
<p>Porkins has taken a strictly neutral stance on Remigrationism, signing nonaggression
pacts with Remigrationist leaders such as <a href="Uriopoges_the_Wiseass.html">Uriopoges the Wiseass</a> along with resistance
leaders such as <a href="Petrov_van_der_Deathface.html">Petrov van der Deathface</a>. In her first address to the Republic
after these pacts, she stated the Third Quartile would not participate in the conflict
in order to devote more time and resources into foosball, the Quartile's national sport.</p>
<p>Porkins is known to participate in competitive kickboxing. Many claim she has used
fist-enlarging drugs to get an edge against her rival, the <a href="Hand_of_Justice.html">Hand of Justice</a> in
the ring. This conspiracy, along with an unfortunately exploitable surname,
has left her with the nickname <b>Lega the Hamhanded</b>. Her supporters deny
all allegations, but have refused to comment when questioned with the fact that
despite over 200 public broadcasts, Porkins' hands have <i>never once appeared on
camera</i>. Coincidence? Just think about it.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>~ Khan, Alexandra</p></span>
</div>
<div class="content citeblock">
<p style="float:right"><a href="Quadrant_Cup.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="Collected_Writings_and_Letters_of_Ignatius_Clivowycz.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="Hand_of_Justice.html">Hand of Justice</a> | <a href="Petrov_van_der_Deathface.html">Petrov van der Deathface</a> | <a href="Uriopoges_the_Wiseass.html">Uriopoges the Wiseass</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Penultimate_Compact.html">Penultimate Compact</a> | <a href="Hand_of_Justice.html">Hand of Justice</a> | <a href="The_WYZZYIRD.html">The WYZZYIRD</a></p>
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<p><span style="font-size:1.5em;">Lexicon Alpha</span></p>
<p>
<a href="../contents/">Contents</a> &mdash;
<a href="../rules/">Rules</a> &mdash;
<a href="../formatting/">Formatting</a> &mdash;
<a href="../session/">Session</a> &mdash;
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</p>
<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>Mystery District</h1>
<p>In every map made of the Republic, on the far side of the Third Quartile, there
is a small sector conspicuously missing. On some maps, you might see it labeled
the <b>Mystery District</b>, though this is simply a name given to the region by
fans of conspiracies surrounding it.</p>
<p>Due to massive walls bordering the district and an estimated 250 personnel on
patrol around the perimeter, no one from outside the district has ever been
inside. As such, absolutely nothing is known about its purpose. Conspirators
have their theories, however:</p>
<p>- As the Mystery District lies on the outer boundary of the Republic, many have
speculated ties to <a href="The_Outlands.html">The Outlands</a>. Some believe <a href="The_WYZZYIRD.html">The WYZZYIRD</a> is involved
in the district as well, but no one who has furthered this theory has ever
been heard from again.</p>
<p>- Perhaps a more reasonable theory is that of resistance leader
<a href="Petrov_van_der_Deathface.html">Petrov van der Deathface</a>, who believes the district to be the secret cult
worshipping grounds of the <a href="Teramince2C_Clown-God_of_Slaughter.html">Clown-God of Slaughter</a>.</p>
<p>- Third Quartile officials have assured the public that there is nothing suspicious
going on in the district, but of course one should take these assurances with
a grain of salt.</p>
<p>Three months ago, <a href="First_Quartile.html">First Quartile</a> leaders said they were preparing an
investigation into the Mystery District, but no action has been taken by them
since then.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>~ Khan, Alexandra</p></span>
</div>
<div class="content citeblock">
<p style="float:right"><a href="Teramince2C_Clown-God_of_Slaughter.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="First_Quartile.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="First_Quartile.html">First Quartile</a> | <a href="Petrov_van_der_Deathface.html">Petrov van der Deathface</a> | <a href="Teramince2C_Clown-God_of_Slaughter.html">Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter</a> | <a href="The_Outlands.html">The Outlands</a> | <a href="The_WYZZYIRD.html">The WYZZYIRD</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Doctrine_of_Imbalance.html">Doctrine of Imbalance</a> | <a href="The_WYZZYIRD.html">The WYZZYIRD</a></p>
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<p><span style="font-size:1.5em;">Lexicon Alpha</span></p>
<p>
<a href="../contents/">Contents</a> &mdash;
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<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>Nose Ceremony</h1>
<p>A Nose Ceremony is a rite of passage among the Disquietists. Young acolytes complete a series of three trials, at the end of which they are presented with a red rubber false nose. Their acceptance of the nose signifies their progression to the full status of clownhood. The exact details of the trials depend on the traditions and strictures of the Disquietist school, but typically the acolytes will face a trial of slapstick, a trial of stand-up comedy, and a trial in which they unsettle as many people as they can within a set time period.</p>
<p>Where Nose Ceremonies had traditionally been more freeform, recent years have seen a shift towards greater control by the acolyte's school. This can be traced to the infamous actions of <a href="Joculus_the_Red.html">Joculus the Red</a>, who, during his Nose Ceremony, murdered eighty people with nothing but an oversized shoe and a cream pie. In the outrage surrounding the massacre, Disquietist schools were forced to take measures to assure the public such an event would not occur again. A notable exception is the <a href="Order_of_the_Black_Ladder.html">Order of the Black Ladder</a>, who, true to form, continue to respond to any and all complaints by filling the complainer's room with googly eyes while they sleep.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Sir Gareth, scholar-general of Haven Rock</p></span>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="World_Transfer_Agency.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="Kindergarten_Kops.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="Joculus_the_Red.html">Joculus the Red</a> | <a href="Order_of_the_Black_Ladder.html">Order of the Black Ladder</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Joculus_the_Red.html">Joculus the Red</a> | <a href="Genocide_of_the_Second_Quartile.html">Genocide of the Second Quartile</a></p>
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<p><span style="font-size:1.5em;">Lexicon Alpha</span></p>
<p>
<a href="../contents/">Contents</a> &mdash;
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<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>Order of the Black Ladder</h1>
<p>The <b>Order of the Black Ladder</b> is an illustrious Disquietist school and quite possibly the most unorthodox. Despite pressure from the Circle of Fifths, the Order has maintained its status as the most unpredictable of the post-Reformation schools. Recent work by cryptoarchaeologists has unearthed evidence that Order meddling was responsible for the prank war whose escalation eventually resulted in the <a href="Battle_of_Quillian_Square.html">Battle of Quillian Square</a>, making them the second-deadliest Disquietist school by body count.</p>
<p>Black Ladder unorthodoxy has resulted in a number of bitter feuds with the more traditional Disquietists that control the Circle. One notable example is their stance on the <a href="World_Transfer_Agency.html">World Transfer Agency</a>: while traditional Disquietism has variously opposed or abetted the WTA, Black Ladder acolytes tend to view it with indifference, going so far as to gain employment in it only to abuse their security credentials for pranks. This and other conflicts characterize the Order's relationship to Disquietism at large (virtually all of the Injunctions found in <a href="Transactions_of_the_Clamorous_Convosembly2C_Vol._5.html">Volume 5 of the <i>Transactions</i></a> are against Order practices).</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Signed, the Right Honorable Honorius Rightson, Esq., PrR, WKD</p></span>
</div>
<div class="content citeblock">
<p style="float:right"><a href="Penultimate_Compact.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="Genocide_of_the_Second_Quartile.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="Battle_of_Quillian_Square.html">Battle of Quillian Square</a> | <a href="Transactions_of_the_Clamorous_Convosembly2C_Vol._5.html">Transactions of the Clamorous Convosembly, Vol. 5</a> | <a href="World_Transfer_Agency.html">World Transfer Agency</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Joculus_the_Red.html">Joculus the Red</a> | <a href="War_of_Civil_Coherence.html">War of Civil Coherence</a> | <a href="Transactions_of_the_Clamorous_Convosembly2C_Vol._5.html">Transactions of the Clamorous Convosembly, Vol. 5</a> | <a href="The_Outlands.html">The Outlands</a> | <a href="Nose_Ceremony.html">Nose Ceremony</a> | <a href="Circus_Moon.html">Circus Moon</a></p>
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<a href="../contents/">Contents</a> &mdash;
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<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>Penultimate Compact</h1>
<p>The <b>Penultimate Compact</b> was a civil and religious agreement which marked the founding of the Risible Republic. It divided the Republic's terrain into several semi-autonomous administrative regions, with each region optimized for a specific economic activity. It was originally known as the "Ultimate Compact," reflecting the contemporaneous belief that the Compact would result in a perfect society with no further need for change. However, the initial design of the Republic resulted in an outbreak of sectarianism, which culminated in the Quartile Reformation and the utter destruction of all but four of the Republic's administrative regions. The first use of the name "Penultimate Compact" was by <a href="Lega_the_Hamhanded.html">Lega the Hamhanded</a> in her inaugural address.</p>
<p>Certain features of the original Compact have persisted to the current day. Most obviously are the Quartiles, the four surviving remnants of the original administrative regions. The post-Reformation Compact also preserved the <a href="World_Transfer_Agency.html">World Transfer Agency</a>, in order to secure the Republic's ability to transport personnel and materials across the radioactive wastes of former regions. The WTA was originally distributed across the Republic, but post-Reformation, the bulk of its assets were concentrated in the <a href="First_Quartile.html">First Quartile</a>.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Sir Gareth, scholar-general of Haven Rock</p></span>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="Double-Eighth_Hexadecisection.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="Order_of_the_Black_Ladder.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="First_Quartile.html">First Quartile</a> | <a href="Lega_the_Hamhanded.html">Lega the Hamhanded</a> | <a href="World_Transfer_Agency.html">World Transfer Agency</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Double-Eighth_Hexadecisection.html">Double-Eighth Hexadecisection</a> | <a href="Westexico.html">Westexico</a></p>
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<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>Petrov van der Deathface</h1>
<p>Okay, we get it. Deathface <i>allegedly</i> single-handedly wiped out no less than
twenty two <a href="Kindergarten_Kops.html">Kops</a> in the <a href="Battle_of_Quillian_Square.html">Battle of Quillian Square</a>. Deathface
has a kill count greater than every other <a href="First_Quartile.html">First Quartile</a> soldier's, combined.
We get it, Deathface was a legendary war hero. The glory of his mustache rivaled
that of Mustachius, the highest of the mustache dieties. But have you ever stopped
to think about how ridiculous those stories are? One single man, accomplishing all
Deathface did in his tragically short-lived life? It's preposterous! The man named
<b>Petrov van der Deathface</b> is nothing but a <i>sham</i>, a marketing ploy to sell
more t-shirts!</p>
<p>Not convinced? Then perhaps consider the fact that Deathface does not have a face.
Everyone knows that real people have faces. Therefore, Petrov van der Deathface
is not a real person. Q. E. Motherfucking. D.</p>
<p>Grab a copy of the <a href="Doctrine_of_Imbalance.html">Doctrine of Imbalance</a> from your local library and give it
a read. It explicitly states in there that Deathface is but a myth. Or something
similar, anyways. Point is, you've all been had! Open your eyes and don't give
into this scam!</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>~ Ersatz Scrivener</p></span>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="Westexico.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="Honorius_Rightson.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="Battle_of_Quillian_Square.html">Battle of Quillian Square</a> | <a href="Doctrine_of_Imbalance.html">Doctrine of Imbalance</a> | <a href="First_Quartile.html">First Quartile</a> | <a href="Kindergarten_Kops.html">Kindergarten Kops</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Mystery_District.html">Mystery District</a> | <a href="War_of_Civil_Coherence.html">War of Civil Coherence</a> | <a href="The_Jocular_Revolution.html">The Jocular Revolution</a> | <a href="Chloroveritase.html">Chloroveritase</a> | <a href="Lega_the_Hamhanded.html">Lega the Hamhanded</a> | <a href="Kindergarten_Kops.html">Kindergarten Kops</a> | <a href="Collected_Writings_and_Letters_of_Ignatius_Clivowycz.html">Collected Writings and Letters of Ignatius Clivowycz</a> | <a href="First_Quartile.html">First Quartile</a></p>
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<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>Quadrant Cup</h1>
<p><i>What is the Quadrant Cup? Well, that's an easy one, sport. It's your one and only
Social Responsibility™! At the end of the day, the hardworking men and women
of the First Quartile deserve an affordable dinner they can depend on --
and that's where you come in!</i></p>
<p><i>Close one eye, and wink into the twinkling eyes of <a href="Uriopoges_the_Wiseass.html">Urion Opogester</a>. Now
close 'em both and race headfirst into</i> <b>Megameat</b><i>'s gaping maw, champ! You'll make
<a href="Honorius_Rightson.html">Honorious Rightson</a> proud!</i></p>
<p><i>You've had </i>your<i> sip of life, and now it's time for life to sip back. Oh, come on now... you wouldn't want to Megameat to summon the <a href="Kindergarten_Kops.html">Kops</a>...</i></p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Konrade Krunch</p></span>
</div>
<div class="content citeblock">
<p style="float:right"><a href="The_WYZZYIRD.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="Lega_the_Hamhanded.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="Honorius_Rightson.html">Honorius Rightson</a> | <a href="Kindergarten_Kops.html">Kindergarten Kops</a> | <a href="Uriopoges_the_Wiseass.html">Uriopoges the Wiseass</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Battle_of_Quillian_Square.html">Battle of Quillian Square</a> | <a href="Strontz-Mork_Fish_Trials.html">Strontz-Mork Fish Trials</a> | <a href="Joculus_the_Red.html">Joculus the Red</a> | <a href="Uriopoges_the_Wiseass.html">Uriopoges the Wiseass</a> | <a href="Hand_of_Justice.html">Hand of Justice</a> | <a href="Teramince2C_Clown-God_of_Slaughter.html">Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter</a> | <a href="Honorius_Rightson.html">Honorius Rightson</a></p>
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<p><span style="font-size:1.5em;">Lexicon Alpha</span></p>
<p>
<a href="../contents/">Contents</a> &mdash;
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<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>Strontz-Mork Fish Trials</h1>
<p>The so-called <b>Strontz-Mork Fish Trials</b> were a series of high-profile show trials institaged by enemies of the Disquietists within the Remigrationist camp. The Fish Trials resulted in the house arrests and subsequent political assassinations of <a href="Collected_Writings_and_Letters_of_Ignatius_Clivowycz.html">prominent Disquietist leaders</a>, which were variously blamed on other causes of death. Their characteristic name comes from the inexplicably successful defense, now known as the "Strontz-Mork Defense", that pointed to the victims' dead pet fish as evidence that the deaths had not been assassinations.</p>
<p>While the precise political motive for the Fish Trials remains unknown, "Sloppy Joe", the mysterious benefactor of the Remigrationist-affiliated annual ritual blood sacrifice known as the <a href="Quadrant_Cup.html">Quadrant Cup</a> -- a euphemism for the massive cup situated between the four Quartiles whose true name is <b>Megameat the Doomgoblet</b> [sic] -- has generally been blamed in recent scholarly review of the topic. After all, the method of assassination matches the previous <a href="Genocide_of_the_Second_Quartile.html">Second Quartile Genocide</a>, which is known to have been started by "Sloppy Joe" in retalitation for the sharp drop in attendence caused by Disquietist fanfiction that made fun of the idea of grinding victims into mincemeat and selling them as sandwiches.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>Signed, the Right Honorable Honorius Rightson, Esq., PrR, WKD</p></span>
</div>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="Transactions_of_the_Clamorous_Convosembly2C_Vol._5.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="Joculus_the_Red.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="Collected_Writings_and_Letters_of_Ignatius_Clivowycz.html">Collected Writings and Letters of Ignatius Clivowycz</a> | <a href="Genocide_of_the_Second_Quartile.html">Genocide of the Second Quartile</a> | <a href="Quadrant_Cup.html">Quadrant Cup</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Genocide_of_the_Second_Quartile.html">Genocide of the Second Quartile</a></p>
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<p><span style="font-size:1.5em;">Lexicon Alpha</span></p>
<p>
<a href="../contents/">Contents</a> &mdash;
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<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter</h1>
<p>According to canon, Teramince ascended over the former Clown-God of Slaughter,
Gigamince, by baking him into a casserole of cosmic proportions and eating
him to gain his power. Once a year, recalling her hilarious feast, Teramince's
sanguine hunger waxes, and wanes only with a leviathan sip of the
<a href="Quadrant_Cup.html">Quadrant Cup</a>.</p>
<p>On this occasion, Teramince takes physical form from the shadows cast by the
<a href="Circus_Moon.html">Circus Moon</a> in order to walk amidst mortals and record flavor notes for
her annual people-tasting. Although unconfirmed by any written report, <a href="Uriopoges_the_Wiseass.html">Uriopoges</a> is fabled to have become her high priest after offering her a nibble of his index finger, whereupon she pronounced him "...a man of excellent taste and flavor."</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Konrade Krunch</p></span>
</div>
<div class="content citeblock">
<p style="float:right"><a href="Doctrine_of_Imbalance.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="Mystery_District.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="Circus_Moon.html">Circus Moon</a> | <a href="Quadrant_Cup.html">Quadrant Cup</a> | <a href="Uriopoges_the_Wiseass.html">Uriopoges the Wiseass</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Trek_and_Remigration_of_the_Antifestivites.html">Trek and Remigration of the Antifestivites</a> | <a href="Mystery_District.html">Mystery District</a> | <a href="Uriopoges_the_Wiseass.html">Uriopoges the Wiseass</a> | <a href="Hand_of_Justice.html">Hand of Justice</a> | <a href="The_Jocular_Revolution.html">The Jocular Revolution</a> | <a href="Honorius_Rightson.html">Honorius Rightson</a> | <a href="Circus_Moon.html">Circus Moon</a> | <a href="First_Quartile.html">First Quartile</a></p>
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<p><span style="font-size:1.5em;">Lexicon Alpha</span></p>
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<a href="../contents/">Contents</a> &mdash;
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</p>
<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>The Disquietist "Circle of Fifths" Revisited</h1>
<p>Although the beginnings of the Disquietist revolution are unclear, many
scholars attribute the movement to would-be Disquietist Convosembly leader
Ignatius Clivowycz' refusal to comply with a demand to "...turn the damned
music down", supposedly issued by his superior officer, Klaus DuKrampus. This
explanation is corroborated by the earliest proceedings of the Convosembly,
which outlines the formation of the governing "Circle of Fifths," responsible
for the authorship of the infamous "Five-Hundred Injunctions."
(<a href="Transactions_of_the_Clamorous_Convosembly2C_Vol._5.html">Transactions of the Clamorous Convosembly, Vol. 5</a>)</p>
<p>While the adumbral Circle is considered inseparable from the movement itself,
Clivowycz' recently-discovered personal correspondence suggests that it may
never have been formed for ideological reasons, but simple personal gain.
Following the Quartile Reformation and its natural extensions, the Tertile
Revival and Quintile Quandary, Clivowycz claims that he proposed the
Circle with the intention of "... [leveraging] popular sentiment... to
place [himself] in control of a world-governing cabal" when writing to his
sole nephew (<a href="Collected_Writings_and_Letters_of_Ignatius_Clivowycz.html">Collected Writings and Letters of Ignatius Clivowycz</a>).
Furthermore, this suggests that the puzzling Disquietist fascination with
small primes is not a philosophical obsession, but rather a strategy to
bolster public appeal.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Konrade Krunch</p></span>
</div>
<div class="content citeblock">
<p style="float:right"><a href="Kindergarten_Kops.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="Collected_Writings_and_Letters_of_Ignatius_Clivowycz.html">Collected Writings and Letters of Ignatius Clivowycz</a> | <a href="Transactions_of_the_Clamorous_Convosembly2C_Vol._5.html">Transactions of the Clamorous Convosembly, Vol. 5</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Collected_Writings_and_Letters_of_Ignatius_Clivowycz.html">Collected Writings and Letters of Ignatius Clivowycz</a> | <a href="Double-Eighth_Hexadecisection.html">Double-Eighth Hexadecisection</a> | <a href="Uriopoges_the_Wiseass.html">Uriopoges the Wiseass</a></p>
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<p><span style="font-size:1.5em;">Lexicon Alpha</span></p>
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<a href="../contents/">Contents</a> &mdash;
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</p>
<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>The Jocular Revolution</h1>
<p>The <a href="The_Jocular_Revolution.html">Jocular Revolution</a> is the name being used for the sudden upheaval of the past
few days. <a href="Joculus_the_Red.html">Joculus the Red</a> has apparently returned, leading operatives who some claim are
<a href="The_WYZZYIRD.html">The WYZZYIRD</a>, to overthrow <b>Megameat the Doomgoblet</b> [sic] and restore balance to
the Quartiles. I've seen reports that <a href="Petrov_van_der_Deathface.html">Petrov van der Deathface</a> is among them.
<a href="Uriopoges_the_Wiseass.html">Uriopoges the Wiseass</a> has apparently been slain in combat, and
<a href="Teramince2C_Clown-God_of_Slaughter.html">Teramince</a> manifested only to be yodeled into
<a href="The_Outlands.html">The Outlands</a>. Information is currently vague, hard to come by, and contradictory, but
if even a fraction of these reports are true, the very course of history is changing as I
pen these words.</p>
<p>May a brighter future await us.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Lord Gareth, scholar-tyrant of Haven Rock</p></span>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="Trek_and_Remigration_of_the_Antifestivites.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="Hand_of_Justice.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="Joculus_the_Red.html">Joculus the Red</a> | <a href="Petrov_van_der_Deathface.html">Petrov van der Deathface</a> | <a href="Teramince2C_Clown-God_of_Slaughter.html">Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter</a> | <a href="The_Jocular_Revolution.html">The Jocular Revolution</a> | <a href="The_Outlands.html">The Outlands</a> | <a href="The_WYZZYIRD.html">The WYZZYIRD</a> | <a href="Uriopoges_the_Wiseass.html">Uriopoges the Wiseass</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="The_Jocular_Revolution.html">The Jocular Revolution</a></p>
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<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>The Outlands</h1>
<p>Far past the edges of the quartiles, three blocks down from the neighborhood of
infinity, the Outlands are rumored to stretch. Those who the Outlands took,
the Outlands took forever.</p>
<p>Leaving the Outlands poses a considerable challenge. All the landscapes are
filmed in portrait. You can only turn left. The ping times are abysmal, and the
sun keeps burning out. Some wonder, licking bitter dew from the leaves of the
refutrees for sustenance, but they'll never leave.</p>
<p><i>Staying</i> in the Outlands is no better. The lice are the size of shoes and the
only mixed drinks are rum and coke. As a courtesy to the wayward prisoner,
there is the occasional quantity of maple syrup, but only enough to make one's
sleeve sticky.</p>
<p>It is unclear who takes people to the Outlands, but the daring few who would
posit a guess universally blame the <a href="The_WYZZYIRD.html">WYZZYIRD</a> or the <a href="World_Transfer_Agency.html">World Transfer Agency</a>.
(These bold souls are not often heard from again.)</p>
<p>Some suggest that the Outlands are an elaborate joke executed by
the <a href="Order_of_the_Black_Ladder.html">Order of the Black Ladder</a>. Would that we knew the punchline.
Wouldn't that we ever see it firsthand.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>Konrade Krunch</p></span>
</div>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="Uriopoges_the_Wiseass.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="God.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="Order_of_the_Black_Ladder.html">Order of the Black Ladder</a> | <a href="The_WYZZYIRD.html">The WYZZYIRD</a> | <a href="World_Transfer_Agency.html">World Transfer Agency</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="The_Jocular_Revolution.html">The Jocular Revolution</a> | <a href="Mystery_District.html">Mystery District</a> | <a href="The_WYZZYIRD.html">The WYZZYIRD</a></p>
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<p><span style="font-size:1.5em;">Lexicon Alpha</span></p>
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</p>
<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>The WYZZYIRD</h1>
<p>The <b>Wavelength Yocto-Zig-Zag Yodel Infiltration/Relocation Division</b>, or <b>WYZZYIRD</b> for short, is alleged to be a clandestine military unit operating out of the enigmatic <a href="Mystery_District.html">Mystery District</a> in the Third Quartile. While the scant evidence of their existence (mostly notes from the private journals of Her Quartness Quartilord <a href="Lega_the_Hamhanded.html">Lega</a>) is disputed academically only in hushed tones, the WYZZYIRD remains a popular topic of urban legend.</p>
<p>The central narratives of the WYZZYIRD legends claim that its operatives use yodelling at absurdly high frequencies -- their titular "wavelength yocto-zig-zag yodel" -- in order to quantum tunnel through walls or across great distances in order to infiltrate their target's location, where they use their yodelling to suck their target through a wormhole to the dreaded <a href="The_Outlands.html">Outlands</a>. Some allege that the WYZZYIRD is a division of the <a href="World_Transfer_Agency.html">World Transfer Agency</a>, but as in all things WYZZYIRD, available facts are scant.</p>
<p>One of the most popular variations on the WYZZYIRD urban legend is the claim that <a href="Joculus_the_Red.html">Joculus the Red</a> is one of their operatives. This tall tale is likely inspired by Joculus' boasts about his ability to hide a burrito in any fridge, even fridges unreachable to mortal men, combined with his unsettling track record of having never lied.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>Signed, the Right Honorable Honorius Rightson, Esq., PrR, WKD</p></span>
</div>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="Chloroveritase.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="Quadrant_Cup.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="Joculus_the_Red.html">Joculus the Red</a> | <a href="Lega_the_Hamhanded.html">Lega the Hamhanded</a> | <a href="Mystery_District.html">Mystery District</a> | <a href="The_Outlands.html">The Outlands</a> | <a href="World_Transfer_Agency.html">World Transfer Agency</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="The_Outlands.html">The Outlands</a> | <a href="Westexico.html">Westexico</a> | <a href="Mystery_District.html">Mystery District</a> | <a href="The_Jocular_Revolution.html">The Jocular Revolution</a></p>
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<p><span style="font-size:1.5em;">Lexicon Alpha</span></p>
<p>
<a href="../contents/">Contents</a> &mdash;
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</p>
<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>Transactions of the Clamorous Convosembly, Vol. 5</h1>
<p>The <b>Transactions of the Clamorous Convosembly</b>, known more concisely as the
<b>Transactions</b>, are a set of volumes detailing the running expenses of the
Clamorous Convosembly. The vast majority of these volumes are of minimal historical
interest, detailing such mundane matters as catering costs and reimbursements for prank
supplies (this last to be expected from any institutionalized gathering of Disquietists).
However, Volume 5 of the <i>Transactions</i> has taken on disproportionate significance
among historians. Volume 5 was compiled during the <a href="Uriopoges_the_Wiseass.html">Uriopoges the Wiseass</a>'s tragically
short-lived tenure as Convosembly treasurer and member of the Circle of Fifths. </p>
<p>Uriopoges, who is recognized mostly for his role as the founder of Remigrationism, had a
habit of making comments in the margins of the <i>Transactions</i>, ranging from insults
about other Convosembly members, to commentary on the proceedings, to moral statements
that foreshadow his later teachings. Contemporary scholars have focused particularly on
what have been termed his "Five-Hundred Injunctions," which mostly rage against the
practices of the <a href="Order_of_the_Black_Ladder.html">Order of the Black Ladder</a>. However, when constructing their
interpretations, these scholars tend to ignore that the Injunctions were written alongside
a truly epic list of prank reimbursements to Hisaguru the Silent, then-current head of the
Order. It should require only elementary reasoning to understand what might have made
Uriopoges so angry about this particular set of pranks.</p>
<p>Unfortunately, emphasis on the Injunctions has served to draw attention away from other
teachings first elucidated in the <i>Transactions</i>, such as his <a href="Doctrine_of_Imbalance.html">Doctrine of Imbalance</a>
and the Parable of the Bird Thief.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Sir Gareth, scholar-general of Haven Rock</p></span>
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<div class="content citeblock">
<p style="float:right"><a href="God.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="Strontz-Mork_Fish_Trials.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="Doctrine_of_Imbalance.html">Doctrine of Imbalance</a> | <a href="Order_of_the_Black_Ladder.html">Order of the Black Ladder</a> | <a href="Uriopoges_the_Wiseass.html">Uriopoges the Wiseass</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="The_Disquietist_22Circle_of_Fifths22_Revisited.html">The Disquietist "Circle of Fifths" Revisited</a> | <a href="Uriopoges_the_Wiseass.html">Uriopoges the Wiseass</a> | <a href="Order_of_the_Black_Ladder.html">Order of the Black Ladder</a> | <a href="Honorius_Rightson.html">Honorius Rightson</a> | <a href="Doctrine_of_Imbalance.html">Doctrine of Imbalance</a></p>
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<p><span style="font-size:1.5em;">Lexicon Alpha</span></p>
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<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>Trek and Remigration of the Antifestivites</h1>
<p>Among those who believe in remigrationism are the <b>Antifestivities</b>, a
less-extreme group known for their condemnation of practices encouraged by
<a href="Joculus_the_Red.html">Joculus the Red</a>. Although they insist that they're "nothing like those
idiots," leveraging the fact that they do not worship the
<a href="Teramince2C_Clown-God_of_Slaughter.html">Clown-God</a>, they are usually lumped together
with the rest of the Disquietists.</p>
<p>The Antifestivities participate in the ongoing remigration, but where are they
migrating to? Some believe they are preparing to take back their homeland, a party
store in the southern parts of the <a href="First_Quartile.html">First Quartile</a> which used to serve as their
office headquarters before the Quartile Reformation. Their name, the <i>Antifestivities</i>,
is misleading; many people mistakenly believe they are against festivities in general.
In reality, though, items such as beer, tortilla chips, and pizza delivery coupons
account for over half of what they take with them on their journeys.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>~ Khan, Alexandra</p></span>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="Gattling_ducks.html" class="phantom">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="The_Jocular_Revolution.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="First_Quartile.html">First Quartile</a> | <a href="Joculus_the_Red.html">Joculus the Red</a> | <a href="Teramince2C_Clown-God_of_Slaughter.html">Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Joculus_the_Red.html">Joculus the Red</a></p>
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<p><span style="font-size:1.5em;">Lexicon Alpha</span></p>
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<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>Uriopoges the Wiseass</h1>
<p>Few figures in the history of the Risible Republic can claim to have as much influence as <b>Urion Opogester</b>, the founder of Remigrationism. He is better known by his cultic name, <b>Uriopoges the Wiseass</b>, which he took after his violent expulsion from the Circle of Fifths and subsequent ascension as the high priest of <a href="Teramince2C_Clown-God_of_Slaughter.html">Teramince</a>.</p>
<p>The first note of Opogester in the records of the Clamorous Convosembly is of a secretary with both exceptional eloquence and vehemence. After his election as treasurer, records in the <a href="Transactions_of_the_Clamorous_Convosembly2C_Vol._5.html"><i>Transactions</i></a> indicate that he took advantage of this position to push his agenda of <i>extreme</i> slapstick and thrill pranks in the Convosembly. While Opogester had high-placed figures like Klaus DuKrampus on his side, the oppositon party headed by Undersecretary <a href="The_Disquietist_22Circle_of_Fifths22_Revisited.html">Ignatius Clivowycz</a> succeeded in ousting him on charges of "crimes against clownhood" and banning him from the Convosembly.</p>
<p>These seminal events would lend shape to the often-amorphous doctrines later grouped under the heading of <b>Remigrationism</b>. Preaching the ephemerality of the world and the cyclical nature of our journey through it -- the "remigration" -- Opogester, now Uriopoges, united the sectarian First Quartile around the idea that the cycle of life is a carousel, carousels are more fun if they go faster, and therefore we ought to send people around it as fast as possible.</p>
<p>Uriopoges' crowning achievement, the construction of <a href="Quadrant_Cup.html"><b>Megameat the Doomgoblet</b></a> [sic], was beset by resistance from orthodox and unorthodox Disquietists alike, which ultimately culminated in the <a href="Battle_of_Quillian_Square.html">Battle of Quillian Square</a>, where the Remigrationists were victorious despite heavy losses.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>Signed, the Right Honorable Honorius Rightson, Esq., PrR, WKD</p></span>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="War_of_Civil_Coherence.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="The_Outlands.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="Battle_of_Quillian_Square.html">Battle of Quillian Square</a> | <a href="Quadrant_Cup.html">Quadrant Cup</a> | <a href="Teramince2C_Clown-God_of_Slaughter.html">Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter</a> | <a href="The_Disquietist_22Circle_of_Fifths22_Revisited.html">The Disquietist "Circle of Fifths" Revisited</a> | <a href="Transactions_of_the_Clamorous_Convosembly2C_Vol._5.html">Transactions of the Clamorous Convosembly, Vol. 5</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="God.html">God</a> | <a href="Quadrant_Cup.html">Quadrant Cup</a> | <a href="Transactions_of_the_Clamorous_Convosembly2C_Vol._5.html">Transactions of the Clamorous Convosembly, Vol. 5</a> | <a href="The_Jocular_Revolution.html">The Jocular Revolution</a> | <a href="Teramince2C_Clown-God_of_Slaughter.html">Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter</a> | <a href="Lega_the_Hamhanded.html">Lega the Hamhanded</a> | <a href="Honorius_Rightson.html">Honorius Rightson</a> | <a href="First_Quartile.html">First Quartile</a></p>
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<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>War of Civil Coherence</h1>
<p>The <b>War of Civil Coherence</b> was a conflict primarily between
<a href="Double-Eighth_Hexadecisection.html">hexadecisections</a> of the <a href="First_Quartile.html">First Quartile</a> and everyone
else. It is unclear exactly why the war began, but many contemporary scholars point to
the escalation of a wide-ranging prank war instigated by the <a href="Order_of_the_Black_Ladder.html">Order of the Black Ladder</a>
against the emerging Remigrationist movement. Note that the label "War of Civil
Coherence" is one insisted upon primarily by First Quartile scholars; among some
Disquietist schools, it is known as "The Revolution pt. II," a reference to the
Disquietist dogmatic teaching that all sequels are inevitably social and commercial
failures.</p>
<p>The war proceeded according to the following pattern, at various scales. First, anti-
Remigrationist forces would perform a prank or other offense in some area. Second, First
Quartile military forces would move to that area and attempt to stamp out resistance.
Without the benefit of <a href="World_Transfer_Agency.html">World Transfer Agency</a> logistical support, the resistance forces
either fought (and died), or relocated to start the cycle anew. </p>
<p>Resistance forces were led by General <a href="Petrov_van_der_Deathface.html">Petrov van der Deathface</a>, who, during the war,
acquired a reputation as an unparalleled tactical genius. Though unable to directly halt
the First Quartile's advance, military historians have noted that he left them
over-extended to the point where a handful of strategic strikes could have crippled their
military machine. Did the grand strategist have a plan to win the war? Sadly, we may
never know, as van der Deathface was killed by a stray bullet at the
<a href="Battle_of_Quillian_Square.html">Battle of Quillian Square</a> while attempting to bait a squad of <a href="Kindergarten_Kops.html">Kindergarten Kops</a>
into charging their First Quartile allies. Within weeks of his death, the First Quartile
declared victory.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Sir Gareth, scholar-prince of Haven Rock</p></span>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="Collected_Writings_and_Letters_of_Ignatius_Clivowycz.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="Uriopoges_the_Wiseass.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="Battle_of_Quillian_Square.html">Battle of Quillian Square</a> | <a href="Double-Eighth_Hexadecisection.html">Double-Eighth Hexadecisection</a> | <a href="First_Quartile.html">First Quartile</a> | <a href="Kindergarten_Kops.html">Kindergarten Kops</a> | <a href="Order_of_the_Black_Ladder.html">Order of the Black Ladder</a> | <a href="Petrov_van_der_Deathface.html">Petrov van der Deathface</a> | <a href="World_Transfer_Agency.html">World Transfer Agency</a></p>
<p>Cited by: &mdash;</p>
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<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>Westexico</h1>
<p>Westexico is a province on the other side of <a href="First_Quartile.html">First Quartile</a> that serves as
<a href="God.html">God</a>'s burrito orchard. While it is generally respected that <a href="God.html">God</a>'s
burrito recipe is simply <i>divine</i>, few other sentient entities have the
sophisticated resources or knowledge necessary to construct a suitable tree to
produce them, like <a href="God.html">God</a> intended.</p>
<p>Because of the logistical problems presented by tunnelling to the other side
of the continent, burritos are a very scare resource. This scarcity makes them a
natural choice for currency in the four Quartiles, accepted anywhere in the Quartiles following the
<a href="Penultimate_Compact.html">Penultimate Compact</a>. Their use as currency has a few peculiar consequences -- first,
that price of a burrito is as unchanging as <a href="God.html">God</a> himself; and second, that one's want for
money grows proportionally with their hunger.</p>
<p>Some conjecture that <a href="The_WYZZYIRD.html">The WYZZYIRD</a>, if it exists, is naught but a get-rich-quick scheme
with the eventual goal of exfiltrating <a href="God.html">God</a>'s entire Westexican Reserve, ordinarily shared
only with his elect. Similarly, there exist rumors of the <a href="Hand_of_Justice.html">Hand of Justice</a> plotting a
similar heist.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Konrade Krunch</p></span>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="Circus_Moon.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
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<p>Citations: <a href="First_Quartile.html">First Quartile</a> | <a href="God.html">God</a> | <a href="Hand_of_Justice.html">Hand of Justice</a> | <a href="Penultimate_Compact.html">Penultimate Compact</a> | <a href="The_WYZZYIRD.html">The WYZZYIRD</a></p>
<p>Cited by: &mdash;</p>
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<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>World Transfer Agency</h1>
<p><b>Overview</b></p>
<p>The World Transfer Agency (WTA) is the organization that handles all permanent relocation
of persons and goods across quartiles. Though its methods have been questioned by naysayers,
it is responsible for the continued security and well-being of every citizen in our glorious
<a href="First_Quartile.html">First Quartile</a>.</p>
<p><b>Controversy</b></p>
<p>The WTA has been the center of debate amongst members of all quartiles. Most often cited is
the organization's use of <a href="Chloroveritase.html">chloroveritase</a> to screen migrants for weapons and other
dangerous materials. It is without a doubt, however, that the chemical's use is more
efficient than any other proposed method.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>~ Khan, Alexandra</p></span>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="Battle_of_Quillian_Square.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="Nose_Ceremony.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="Chloroveritase.html">Chloroveritase</a> | <a href="First_Quartile.html">First Quartile</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="First_Quartile.html">First Quartile</a> | <a href="Penultimate_Compact.html">Penultimate Compact</a> | <a href="War_of_Civil_Coherence.html">War of Civil Coherence</a> | <a href="Order_of_the_Black_Ladder.html">Order of the Black Ladder</a> | <a href="The_Outlands.html">The Outlands</a> | <a href="Chloroveritase.html">Chloroveritase</a> | <a href="The_WYZZYIRD.html">The WYZZYIRD</a></p>
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<p><span style="font-size:1.5em;">Lexicon Alpha</span></p>
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<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
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<h1>Index of Lexicon Alpha</h1>
<p>There are <b>33</b> entries, <b>32</b> written and <b>1</b> phantom.</p>
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<ul>
<h3>ABC</h3>
<li><a href="../article/Battle_of_Quillian_Square.html">Battle of Quillian Square</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Chloroveritase.html">Chloroveritase</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Circus_Moon.html">Circus Moon</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Collected_Writings_and_Letters_of_Ignatius_Clivowycz.html">Collected Writings and Letters of Ignatius Clivowycz</a></li>
<h3>DEF</h3>
<li><a href="../article/The_Disquietist_22Circle_of_Fifths22_Revisited.html">The Disquietist "Circle of Fifths" Revisited</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Doctrine_of_Imbalance.html">Doctrine of Imbalance</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Double-Eighth_Hexadecisection.html">Double-Eighth Hexadecisection</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/First_Quartile.html">First Quartile</a></li>
<h3>GHI</h3>
<li><a href="../article/Gattling_ducks.html" class="phantom">Gattling ducks</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Genocide_of_the_Second_Quartile.html">Genocide of the Second Quartile</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/God.html">God</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Hand_of_Justice.html">Hand of Justice</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Honorius_Rightson.html">Honorius Rightson</a></li>
<h3>JKL</h3>
<li><a href="../article/The_Jocular_Revolution.html">The Jocular Revolution</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Joculus_the_Red.html">Joculus the Red</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Kindergarten_Kops.html">Kindergarten Kops</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Lega_the_Hamhanded.html">Lega the Hamhanded</a></li>
<h3>MNO</h3>
<li><a href="../article/Mystery_District.html">Mystery District</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Nose_Ceremony.html">Nose Ceremony</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Order_of_the_Black_Ladder.html">Order of the Black Ladder</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/The_Outlands.html">The Outlands</a></li>
<h3>PQRS</h3>
<li><a href="../article/Penultimate_Compact.html">Penultimate Compact</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Petrov_van_der_Deathface.html">Petrov van der Deathface</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Quadrant_Cup.html">Quadrant Cup</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Strontz-Mork_Fish_Trials.html">Strontz-Mork Fish Trials</a></li>
<h3>TUV</h3>
<li><a href="../article/Teramince2C_Clown-God_of_Slaughter.html">Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Transactions_of_the_Clamorous_Convosembly2C_Vol._5.html">Transactions of the Clamorous Convosembly, Vol. 5</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Trek_and_Remigration_of_the_Antifestivites.html">Trek and Remigration of the Antifestivites</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Uriopoges_the_Wiseass.html">Uriopoges the Wiseass</a></li>
<h3>WXYZ</h3>
<li><a href="../article/War_of_Civil_Coherence.html">War of Civil Coherence</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Westexico.html">Westexico</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/World_Transfer_Agency.html">World Transfer Agency</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/The_WYZZYIRD.html">The WYZZYIRD</a></li>
</ul>
</div>
<div id="turn-order" style="display:none">
<ul>
<h3>Turn 1</h3>
<li><a href="../article/The_Disquietist_22Circle_of_Fifths22_Revisited.html">The Disquietist "Circle of Fifths" Revisited</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Kindergarten_Kops.html">Kindergarten Kops</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Nose_Ceremony.html">Nose Ceremony</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/World_Transfer_Agency.html">World Transfer Agency</a></li>
<h3>Turn 2</h3>
<li><a href="../article/Battle_of_Quillian_Square.html">Battle of Quillian Square</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Genocide_of_the_Second_Quartile.html">Genocide of the Second Quartile</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Order_of_the_Black_Ladder.html">Order of the Black Ladder</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Penultimate_Compact.html">Penultimate Compact</a></li>
<h3>Turn 3</h3>
<li><a href="../article/Double-Eighth_Hexadecisection.html">Double-Eighth Hexadecisection</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Joculus_the_Red.html">Joculus the Red</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Strontz-Mork_Fish_Trials.html">Strontz-Mork Fish Trials</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Transactions_of_the_Clamorous_Convosembly2C_Vol._5.html">Transactions of the Clamorous Convosembly, Vol. 5</a></li>
<h3>Turn 4</h3>
<li><a href="../article/God.html">God</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/The_Outlands.html">The Outlands</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Uriopoges_the_Wiseass.html">Uriopoges the Wiseass</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/War_of_Civil_Coherence.html">War of Civil Coherence</a></li>
<h3>Turn 5</h3>
<li><a href="../article/Collected_Writings_and_Letters_of_Ignatius_Clivowycz.html">Collected Writings and Letters of Ignatius Clivowycz</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Lega_the_Hamhanded.html">Lega the Hamhanded</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Quadrant_Cup.html">Quadrant Cup</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/The_WYZZYIRD.html">The WYZZYIRD</a></li>
<h3>Turn 6</h3>
<li><a href="../article/Chloroveritase.html">Chloroveritase</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/First_Quartile.html">First Quartile</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Mystery_District.html">Mystery District</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Teramince2C_Clown-God_of_Slaughter.html">Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter</a></li>
<h3>Turn 7</h3>
<li><a href="../article/Doctrine_of_Imbalance.html">Doctrine of Imbalance</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Honorius_Rightson.html">Honorius Rightson</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Petrov_van_der_Deathface.html">Petrov van der Deathface</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Westexico.html">Westexico</a></li>
<h3>Turn 8</h3>
<li><a href="../article/Circus_Moon.html">Circus Moon</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Hand_of_Justice.html">Hand of Justice</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/The_Jocular_Revolution.html">The Jocular Revolution</a></li>
<li><a href="../article/Trek_and_Remigration_of_the_Antifestivites.html">Trek and Remigration of the Antifestivites</a></li>
<h3>Unwritten</h3>
<li><a href="../article/Gattling_ducks.html" class="phantom">Gattling ducks</a></li>
</ul>
</div>
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<title>Formatting | Lexicon Alpha</title>
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div#header { background-color: #ffffff; margin: 10px 0; box-shadow: 2px 2px 10px #888888; overflow: hidden; }
img#logo { float:left; margin:8px; max-width: 140px; }
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<p><span style="font-size:1.5em;">Lexicon Alpha</span></p>
<p>
<a href="../contents/">Contents</a> &mdash;
<a href="../rules/">Rules</a> &mdash;
<a href="../formatting/">Formatting</a> &mdash;
<a href="../session/">Session</a> &mdash;
<a href="../statistics/">Statistics</a>
</p>
<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>Formatting</h1>
<p>Lexipython provides support for a limited amount of Markdown-esque formatting.</p>
<pre style="background:#eeeeee">
# Player: PN
# Turn: 1
# Title: Example page
This is an example page.
Some words are //italicized//,
and some words are **bolded**.
All of these sentences are part of the same paragraph.
This is a new paragraph.\\
Unlike the last paragraph, this line will be after a line break within the paragraph.
This is an [[example citation|Phantom page]]. You can also cite a [[phantom page]] with just the title.
~Dr. X. Amplepage
</pre>
<p>Each turn, fill out the header with your player information, the current turn, and the title of your entry. The <i>Player</i> field can be anything as long as it's the same for all articles you write (even when they're by different characters). Using your initials is recommended.</p>
<p>Two line breaks begins a new paragraph. A single line break does nothing, unless the line is neded by a double backslash (\\).</p>
<p>Text bounded by ** will be bolded: **bold** produces <b>bold</b>. Text bounded by // will be italicized: //italics// produces <i>italics</i>.</p>
<p>To cite another Lexicon entry, use double brackets. Text in double brackets will cite and link to the entry of the same name: [[Example page]] produces <a href="Example_page.html" class="phantom">Example page</a>. Text in double brackets split with a | will alias the link as the left text and link to the entry with the name of the right text: [[this text|Example page]] produces <a href="Example_page.html" class="phantom">this text</a>. <b>You must be precise in the entry title you cite to.</b> Citations to "Example" vs. "The Example" will point to different entries and create different phantoms, and your GM will probably have to clean up after you.</p>
<p>Beginning a paragraph with ~ will right-align it and place a horizontal line above it. Use this for signing your entry with your scholar's name.</p>
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# LEXIPYTHON CONFIG FILE
#
# This file defines the configuration values for an instance of Lexipython.
# Configuration values are written as:
>>>CONFIG_NAME>>>
value
<<<CONFIG_NAME<<<
# The above defines a config value named CONFIG_NAME with a value of "value".
# The title of the Lexicon game, displayed at the top of each entry.
>>>LEXICON_TITLE>>>
Lexicon Alpha
<<<LEXICON_TITLE<<<
# The sidebar image. Constrained to 140-px.
>>>LOGO_FILENAME>>>
logo.png
<<<LOGO_FILENAME<<<
# The prompt for the Lexicon. Will be read as HTML and inserted into the
# header directly.
>>>PROMPT>>>
In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.
<<<PROMPT<<<
# Session page content. Will be read as HTML and inserted into the body of
# the session page directly.
>>>SESSION_PAGE>>>
<p>Lexicon Alpha was played March 11 - 19, 2017.</p>
<<<SESSION_PAGE<<<
# Index headers. An index is a string of characters, which are the characters
# an entry has to begin with to fall under that index. Indices will be listed
# in the order written. Entries will be put into the first index they match.
# Leftover entries will be listed under "&c." at the end.
>>>INDEX_LIST>>>
ABC
DEF
GHI
JKL
MNO
PQRS
TUV
WXYZ
<<<INDEX_LIST<<<
>>>PRINTABLE_FILE>>>
printable.html
<<<PRINTABLE_FILE<<<

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img#logo { float:left; margin:8px; max-width: 140px; }
div#header p { margin:10px; }
div.content { margin-top: 10px; background-color: #ffffff; padding: 10px; box-shadow: 2px 2px 10px #888888; overflow: hidden; }
a.phantom { color: #cc2200; }
div.citeblock a.phantom { font-style: italic; }
span.signature { text-align: right; }
div.moveable { float: left; margin: 8px; }
div.moveable p { margin: 0px; }
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sup { vertical-align: top; font-size: 0.6em; }
</style>
<body>
<h1>Lexicon Alpha</h1><div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>The Disquietist "Circle of Fifths" Revisited</h2>
<p>Although the beginnings of the Disquietist revolution are unclear, many
scholars attribute the movement to would-be Disquietist Convosembly leader
Ignatius Clivowycz' refusal to comply with a demand to "...turn the damned
music down", supposedly issued by his superior officer, Klaus DuKrampus. This
explanation is corroborated by the earliest proceedings of the Convosembly,
which outlines the formation of the governing "Circle of Fifths," responsible
for the authorship of the infamous "Five-Hundred Injunctions."
(Transactions of the Clamorous Convosembly, Vol. 5<sup>1</sup>)</p></div>
<p>While the adumbral Circle is considered inseparable from the movement itself,
Clivowycz' recently-discovered personal correspondence suggests that it may
never have been formed for ideological reasons, but simple personal gain.
Following the Quartile Reformation and its natural extensions, the Tertile
Revival and Quintile Quandary, Clivowycz claims that he proposed the
Circle with the intention of "... [leveraging] popular sentiment... to
place [himself] in control of a world-governing cabal" when writing to his
sole nephew (Collected Writings and Letters of Ignatius Clivowycz<sup>2</sup>).
Furthermore, this suggests that the puzzling Disquietist fascination with
small primes is not a philosophical obsession, but rather a strategy to
bolster public appeal.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Konrade Krunch</p></span>
<p><i>Citations:</i><br>
1. Transactions of the Clamorous Convosembly, Vol. 5
<br>
2. Collected Writings and Letters of Ignatius Clivowycz
</p>
<div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>Kindergarten Kops</h2>
<p>The paramilitary force known as the <b>Kindergerten Kops</b> was a brutal enforcement mechanism of
the Fourth Quartile. With all the power of a mechanized mercenary army and all the diplomatic
skill of a class of kindergarteners, the mech-piloting toddlers of the Kops painted a bloody
swath across the chaos of the Reformation.</p></div>
<p>Full specifications of the Kops' armored chassis were never released to the public, but redacted
documents detail military-grade armor protecting critical sections such as joints and the
toddler pilot. Accounts of Kop raids recount several weapon types, including tear gas grenade
launchers, flamethrowers, gatling guns, and heavy artillery. Reports indicate that their weapons
were grafted to the chassis' arms, so it is likely that there were several distinct roles within the
Kindergarten Kops that specialized chassis were designed for.</p>
<p>Eyewitness testimony reports that Kindergarten Kops led the charge at the Battle of Quillian Square<sup>1</sup>
that broke the resistance lines and resulted in the deaths of several opposition leaders, including
Petrov van der Deathface<sup>2</sup>.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Signed, the Right Honorable Honorius Rightson, Esq., PrR, WKD</p></span>
<p><i>Citations:</i><br>
1. Battle of Quillian Square
<br>
2. Petrov van der Deathface
</p>
<div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>Nose Ceremony</h2>
<p>A Nose Ceremony is a rite of passage among the Disquietists. Young acolytes complete a series of three trials, at the end of which they are presented with a red rubber false nose. Their acceptance of the nose signifies their progression to the full status of clownhood. The exact details of the trials depend on the traditions and strictures of the Disquietist school, but typically the acolytes will face a trial of slapstick, a trial of stand-up comedy, and a trial in which they unsettle as many people as they can within a set time period.</p></div>
<p>Where Nose Ceremonies had traditionally been more freeform, recent years have seen a shift towards greater control by the acolyte's school. This can be traced to the infamous actions of Joculus the Red<sup>1</sup>, who, during his Nose Ceremony, murdered eighty people with nothing but an oversized shoe and a cream pie. In the outrage surrounding the massacre, Disquietist schools were forced to take measures to assure the public such an event would not occur again. A notable exception is the Order of the Black Ladder<sup>2</sup>, who, true to form, continue to respond to any and all complaints by filling the complainer's room with googly eyes while they sleep.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Sir Gareth, scholar-general of Haven Rock</p></span>
<p><i>Citations:</i><br>
1. Joculus the Red
<br>
2. Order of the Black Ladder
</p>
<div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>World Transfer Agency</h2>
<p><b>Overview</b></p></div>
<p>The World Transfer Agency (WTA) is the organization that handles all permanent relocation
of persons and goods across quartiles. Though its methods have been questioned by naysayers,
it is responsible for the continued security and well-being of every citizen in our glorious
First Quartile<sup>1</sup>.</p>
<p><b>Controversy</b></p>
<p>The WTA has been the center of debate amongst members of all quartiles. Most often cited is
the organization's use of chloroveritase<sup>2</sup> to screen migrants for weapons and other
dangerous materials. It is without a doubt, however, that the chemical's use is more
efficient than any other proposed method.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>~ Khan, Alexandra</p></span>
<p><i>Citations:</i><br>
1. First Quartile
<br>
2. Chloroveritase
</p>
<div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>Battle of Quillian Square</h2>
<p>Quillian Square: birthplace of the "Sloppy Joe" and hometown of military
general Septimus the Eighth. Now a destitute nuclear wasteland, thanks to some
kids and a personal grudge. Since I don't get paid enough to cover any of the
important battles, I'll take the opportunity to set the facts straight on what
did and did not happen in the Battle of Quillian Square.</p></div>
<p><b>What happened?</b></p>
<p>• The square was ransacked by a group of mechanized infants known as the Kindergarten Kops<sup>1</sup>.
It is unclear what the motive was behind the attack, but expert witness
"Sloppy" Joe believes it was a pitiful attempt to challenge
the monopoly of the Sloppy Joe on the sandwich market.</p>
<p>• The Battle of Quillian Square featured the first, and only, ever recorded use of
gattling ducks<sup>2</sup> in military warfare.</p>
<p><b>What did not happen?</b></p>
<p>• First Quartile military control was <i>not</i> reduced in Quillian Square or any
surrounding area as a result of the battle.</p>
<p>• Radiation from the battle has <i>not</i> had any affect on the nutritional value of
Sloppy Joes.</p>
<p>The Battle of Quillian Square saw a great, thriving town reduced to rubble and
ruins, although sources suggest you can still purchase a Sloppy Joe from
Sloppy Joe's, only 5.99!</p>
<p><i>This article was not sponsored in any way by Sloppy Joe's Sloppy Joe sandwiches, the official</i>
<i>sandwich of the 13th annual Quadrant Cup<sup>3</sup>.</i></p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>~ Khan, Alexandra</p></span>
<p><i>Citations:</i><br>
1. Kindergarten Kops
<br>
2. Gattling ducks
<br>
3. Quadrant Cup
</p>
<div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>Genocide of the Second Quartile</h2>
<p>Following the conclusion of the Double-Eighth Hexadecisection<sup>1</sup>, most
quartiles resorted to controversal means of achieving their political goals. Most shocking among them is the <b>Genocide of the Second Quartile</b>, provoked by a particularly detestable, pun-laden Disquietist fan fiction.</p></div>
<p>The genocide began swiftly, with the introduction of reams of paperwork into
the dwellings of anyone sporting a Red Nose<sup>2</sup>. Crippled
by their life-long instruction in carefree japery, the Disquietists were unable
to cope, and most passed away before the filing deadline.
Subsequent experiments with fish<sup>3</sup> indicate that fish subjected
to life with 10kg of paperwork in their habitat tend to quickly suffocate or
die of starvation. A similar biological process is thought to be responsible
for the near extinction of the Disquietists from the second quartile.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Konrade Krunch</p></span>
<p><i>Citations:</i><br>
1. Double-Eighth Hexadecisection
<br>
2. Nose Ceremony
<br>
3. Strontz-Mork Fish Trials
</p>
<div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>Order of the Black Ladder</h2>
<p>The <b>Order of the Black Ladder</b> is an illustrious Disquietist school and quite possibly the most unorthodox. Despite pressure from the Circle of Fifths, the Order has maintained its status as the most unpredictable of the post-Reformation schools. Recent work by cryptoarchaeologists has unearthed evidence that Order meddling was responsible for the prank war whose escalation eventually resulted in the Battle of Quillian Square<sup>1</sup>, making them the second-deadliest Disquietist school by body count.</p></div>
<p>Black Ladder unorthodoxy has resulted in a number of bitter feuds with the more traditional Disquietists that control the Circle. One notable example is their stance on the World Transfer Agency<sup>2</sup>: while traditional Disquietism has variously opposed or abetted the WTA, Black Ladder acolytes tend to view it with indifference, going so far as to gain employment in it only to abuse their security credentials for pranks. This and other conflicts characterize the Order's relationship to Disquietism at large (virtually all of the Injunctions found in Volume 5 of the <i>Transactions</i><sup>3</sup> are against Order practices).</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Signed, the Right Honorable Honorius Rightson, Esq., PrR, WKD</p></span>
<p><i>Citations:</i><br>
1. Battle of Quillian Square
<br>
2. World Transfer Agency
<br>
3. Transactions of the Clamorous Convosembly, Vol. 5
</p>
<div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>Penultimate Compact</h2>
<p>The <b>Penultimate Compact</b> was a civil and religious agreement which marked the founding of the Risible Republic. It divided the Republic's terrain into several semi-autonomous administrative regions, with each region optimized for a specific economic activity. It was originally known as the "Ultimate Compact," reflecting the contemporaneous belief that the Compact would result in a perfect society with no further need for change. However, the initial design of the Republic resulted in an outbreak of sectarianism, which culminated in the Quartile Reformation and the utter destruction of all but four of the Republic's administrative regions. The first use of the name "Penultimate Compact" was by Lega the Hamhanded<sup>1</sup> in her inaugural address.</p></div>
<p>Certain features of the original Compact have persisted to the current day. Most obviously are the Quartiles, the four surviving remnants of the original administrative regions. The post-Reformation Compact also preserved the World Transfer Agency<sup>2</sup>, in order to secure the Republic's ability to transport personnel and materials across the radioactive wastes of former regions. The WTA was originally distributed across the Republic, but post-Reformation, the bulk of its assets were concentrated in the First Quartile<sup>3</sup>.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Sir Gareth, scholar-general of Haven Rock</p></span>
<p><i>Citations:</i><br>
1. Lega the Hamhanded
<br>
2. World Transfer Agency
<br>
3. First Quartile
</p>
<div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>Double-Eighth Hexadecisection</h2>
<p>To some, the Double-Eighth Hexadecisection was a godsend. No longer were there
single big governments ruling over each of the four quartiles, but rather
four smaller governments in place of each original. Some argue that without this
dramatic shift, we would never have seen the fall of the infamous Joculus the Red<sup>1</sup>.</p></div>
<p>To others, the Double-Eighth Hexadecisection was the single worst piece of
legislation in the history of the quartiles since the Penultimate Compact<sup>2</sup>.
Originally, there was simplicity, a harmony of four governments working together
for the benefit of all. Now, there is chaos, a political frenzy that has rendered
the legislative process obsolete. Initially, some argued that the newly-created
factions such as the Circle of Fifths<sup>3</sup>
were radical and unorthodox. For reasons unknown, the voices of opposition have
grown quieter over the years.</p>
<p>And to a select few, the Double-Eighth Hexadecisection remains one of many
phrases impossible to say correctly on the first try.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>~ Khan, Alexandra</p></span>
<p><i>Citations:</i><br>
1. Joculus the Red
<br>
2. Penultimate Compact
<br>
3. The Disquietist "Circle of Fifths" Revisited
</p>
<div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>Joculus the Red</h2>
<p>Joculus the Red was an influential and infamous Disquietist known principally for his fateful Nose Ceremony<sup>1</sup> massacre.
Even from an early age, Joculus was alarmingly incapable of differentiating jokes from savage transgressions against God and humanity alike.
Subsequent research suggests that this was likely due to accumulated exposure to trace amounts of chloroveritase<sup>2</sup> as a toddler, which provoked hypersensitivity
of his ulnar nerve. The Antifestivites vilified him, recounting his tasteless "jokes" in support of the remigration<sup>3</sup>.</p></div>
<p><i>Among his odious "pranks" gone awry:</i></p>
<p><b>-</b> Ruining the fifth Quadrant Cup<sup>4</sup> by substituting sugar for baking soda in the Sloppy Joe's industrial cookbook</p>
<p><b>-</b> Defusing the world's entire supply of exploding cigars</p>
<p><b>-</b> Bankrupting the First Quadrant's premier restaurant franchise by exploiting its "unlimited breadsticks" policy</p>
<p><b>-</b> Leaving an outstanding library fine unpaid</p>
<p><b>-</b> Signing his name as "Jacklus ;)" in the Order of the Black Ladder<sup>5</sup> guestbook</p>
<p><b>-</b> Mixing tabs and spaces</p>
<p><b>-</b> Wearing, simultaneously, striped socks and plaid pajamas (later punishable by death in the second quartile)</p>
<p>Let us never speak of him again!</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Konrade Krunch</p></span>
<p> </p>
<p>&lt;script&gt;alert("He even placed errant script tags on unsuspecting web applications!");&lt;/script&gt;</p>
<p><i>Citations:</i><br>
1. Nose Ceremony
<br>
2. Chloroveritase
<br>
3. Trek and Remigration of the Antifestivites
<br>
4. Quadrant Cup
<br>
5. Order of the Black Ladder
</p>
<div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>Strontz-Mork Fish Trials</h2>
<p>The so-called <b>Strontz-Mork Fish Trials</b> were a series of high-profile show trials institaged by enemies of the Disquietists within the Remigrationist camp. The Fish Trials resulted in the house arrests and subsequent political assassinations of prominent Disquietist leaders<sup>1</sup>, which were variously blamed on other causes of death. Their characteristic name comes from the inexplicably successful defense, now known as the "Strontz-Mork Defense", that pointed to the victims' dead pet fish as evidence that the deaths had not been assassinations.</p></div>
<p>While the precise political motive for the Fish Trials remains unknown, "Sloppy Joe", the mysterious benefactor of the Remigrationist-affiliated annual ritual blood sacrifice known as the Quadrant Cup<sup>2</sup> -- a euphemism for the massive cup situated between the four Quartiles whose true name is <b>Megameat the Doomgoblet</b> [sic] -- has generally been blamed in recent scholarly review of the topic. After all, the method of assassination matches the previous Second Quartile Genocide<sup>3</sup>, which is known to have been started by "Sloppy Joe" in retalitation for the sharp drop in attendence caused by Disquietist fanfiction that made fun of the idea of grinding victims into mincemeat and selling them as sandwiches.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>Signed, the Right Honorable Honorius Rightson, Esq., PrR, WKD</p></span>
<p><i>Citations:</i><br>
1. Collected Writings and Letters of Ignatius Clivowycz
<br>
2. Quadrant Cup
<br>
3. Genocide of the Second Quartile
</p>
<div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>Transactions of the Clamorous Convosembly, Vol. 5</h2>
<p>The <b>Transactions of the Clamorous Convosembly</b>, known more concisely as the
<b>Transactions</b>, are a set of volumes detailing the running expenses of the
Clamorous Convosembly. The vast majority of these volumes are of minimal historical
interest, detailing such mundane matters as catering costs and reimbursements for prank
supplies (this last to be expected from any institutionalized gathering of Disquietists).
However, Volume 5 of the <i>Transactions</i> has taken on disproportionate significance
among historians. Volume 5 was compiled during the Uriopoges the Wiseass<sup>1</sup>'s tragically
short-lived tenure as Convosembly treasurer and member of the Circle of Fifths. </p></div>
<p>Uriopoges, who is recognized mostly for his role as the founder of Remigrationism, had a
habit of making comments in the margins of the <i>Transactions</i>, ranging from insults
about other Convosembly members, to commentary on the proceedings, to moral statements
that foreshadow his later teachings. Contemporary scholars have focused particularly on
what have been termed his "Five-Hundred Injunctions," which mostly rage against the
practices of the Order of the Black Ladder<sup>2</sup>. However, when constructing their
interpretations, these scholars tend to ignore that the Injunctions were written alongside
a truly epic list of prank reimbursements to Hisaguru the Silent, then-current head of the
Order. It should require only elementary reasoning to understand what might have made
Uriopoges so angry about this particular set of pranks.</p>
<p>Unfortunately, emphasis on the Injunctions has served to draw attention away from other
teachings first elucidated in the <i>Transactions</i>, such as his Doctrine of Imbalance<sup>3</sup>
and the Parable of the Bird Thief.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Sir Gareth, scholar-general of Haven Rock</p></span>
<p><i>Citations:</i><br>
1. Uriopoges the Wiseass
<br>
2. Order of the Black Ladder
<br>
3. Doctrine of Imbalance
</p>
<div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>God</h2>
<p>A being known by all and agreed upon by none. Most widely known for his holy text,
the Rules page. While scholars previously believed God to be largely absent from
the workings of the world, new evidence points to his involvement in many key
events in recent times.</p></div>
<p>In the aftermath of the Genocide of the Second Quartile<sup>1</sup>, graffiti has been
seen on various buildings with messages such as "God was here." It is
unclear whether God had a direct influence on the massacre, or if this is
just another attempt by Joculus the Red<sup>2</sup> to get revenge on God for stealing
his burrito from the office fridge.</p>
<p>God's allegiance has been debated, though evidence suggests he may lean slightly
toward Disquietism. "The First Quartile has most of the resources and power," stated
God, when questioned about the subject, "and the Disquietists, and the Order of
the Black Ladder in particular, are resisting them."</p>
<p>God has been cited numerous times as the divine inspiration for such radical works
as Uriopoges<sup>3</sup>' Doctrine of Imbalance<sup>4</sup>, though he continues
to remain silent on these issues.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>~ Khan, Alexandra</p></span>
<p><i>Citations:</i><br>
1. Genocide of the Second Quartile
<br>
2. Joculus the Red
<br>
3. Uriopoges the Wiseass
<br>
4. Doctrine of Imbalance
</p>
<div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>The Outlands</h2>
<p>Far past the edges of the quartiles, three blocks down from the neighborhood of
infinity, the Outlands are rumored to stretch. Those who the Outlands took,
the Outlands took forever.</p></div>
<p>Leaving the Outlands poses a considerable challenge. All the landscapes are
filmed in portrait. You can only turn left. The ping times are abysmal, and the
sun keeps burning out. Some wonder, licking bitter dew from the leaves of the
refutrees for sustenance, but they'll never leave.</p>
<p><i>Staying</i> in the Outlands is no better. The lice are the size of shoes and the
only mixed drinks are rum and coke. As a courtesy to the wayward prisoner,
there is the occasional quantity of maple syrup, but only enough to make one's
sleeve sticky.</p>
<p>It is unclear who takes people to the Outlands, but the daring few who would
posit a guess universally blame the WYZZYIRD<sup>1</sup> or the World Transfer Agency<sup>2</sup>.
(These bold souls are not often heard from again.)</p>
<p>Some suggest that the Outlands are an elaborate joke executed by
the Order of the Black Ladder<sup>3</sup>. Would that we knew the punchline.
Wouldn't that we ever see it firsthand.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>Konrade Krunch</p></span>
<p><i>Citations:</i><br>
1. The WYZZYIRD
<br>
2. World Transfer Agency
<br>
3. Order of the Black Ladder
</p>
<div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>Uriopoges the Wiseass</h2>
<p>Few figures in the history of the Risible Republic can claim to have as much influence as <b>Urion Opogester</b>, the founder of Remigrationism. He is better known by his cultic name, <b>Uriopoges the Wiseass</b>, which he took after his violent expulsion from the Circle of Fifths and subsequent ascension as the high priest of Teramince<sup>1</sup>.</p></div>
<p>The first note of Opogester in the records of the Clamorous Convosembly is of a secretary with both exceptional eloquence and vehemence. After his election as treasurer, records in the <i>Transactions</i><sup>2</sup> indicate that he took advantage of this position to push his agenda of <i>extreme</i> slapstick and thrill pranks in the Convosembly. While Opogester had high-placed figures like Klaus DuKrampus on his side, the oppositon party headed by Undersecretary Ignatius Clivowycz<sup>3</sup> succeeded in ousting him on charges of "crimes against clownhood" and banning him from the Convosembly.</p>
<p>These seminal events would lend shape to the often-amorphous doctrines later grouped under the heading of <b>Remigrationism</b>. Preaching the ephemerality of the world and the cyclical nature of our journey through it -- the "remigration" -- Opogester, now Uriopoges, united the sectarian First Quartile around the idea that the cycle of life is a carousel, carousels are more fun if they go faster, and therefore we ought to send people around it as fast as possible.</p>
<p>Uriopoges' crowning achievement, the construction of <b>Megameat the Doomgoblet</b><sup>4</sup> [sic], was beset by resistance from orthodox and unorthodox Disquietists alike, which ultimately culminated in the Battle of Quillian Square<sup>5</sup>, where the Remigrationists were victorious despite heavy losses.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>Signed, the Right Honorable Honorius Rightson, Esq., PrR, WKD</p></span>
<p><i>Citations:</i><br>
1. Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter
<br>
2. Transactions of the Clamorous Convosembly, Vol. 5
<br>
3. The Disquietist "Circle of Fifths" Revisited
<br>
4. Quadrant Cup
<br>
5. Battle of Quillian Square
</p>
<div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>War of Civil Coherence</h2>
<p>The <b>War of Civil Coherence</b> was a conflict primarily between
hexadecisections<sup>1</sup> of the First Quartile<sup>2</sup> and everyone
else. It is unclear exactly why the war began, but many contemporary scholars point to
the escalation of a wide-ranging prank war instigated by the Order of the Black Ladder<sup>3</sup>
against the emerging Remigrationist movement. Note that the label "War of Civil
Coherence" is one insisted upon primarily by First Quartile scholars; among some
Disquietist schools, it is known as "The Revolution pt. II," a reference to the
Disquietist dogmatic teaching that all sequels are inevitably social and commercial
failures.</p></div>
<p>The war proceeded according to the following pattern, at various scales. First, anti-
Remigrationist forces would perform a prank or other offense in some area. Second, First
Quartile military forces would move to that area and attempt to stamp out resistance.
Without the benefit of World Transfer Agency<sup>4</sup> logistical support, the resistance forces
either fought (and died), or relocated to start the cycle anew. </p>
<p>Resistance forces were led by General Petrov van der Deathface<sup>5</sup>, who, during the war,
acquired a reputation as an unparalleled tactical genius. Though unable to directly halt
the First Quartile's advance, military historians have noted that he left them
over-extended to the point where a handful of strategic strikes could have crippled their
military machine. Did the grand strategist have a plan to win the war? Sadly, we may
never know, as van der Deathface was killed by a stray bullet at the
Battle of Quillian Square<sup>6</sup> while attempting to bait a squad of Kindergarten Kops<sup>7</sup>
into charging their First Quartile allies. Within weeks of his death, the First Quartile
declared victory.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Sir Gareth, scholar-prince of Haven Rock</p></span>
<p><i>Citations:</i><br>
1. Double-Eighth Hexadecisection
<br>
2. First Quartile
<br>
3. Order of the Black Ladder
<br>
4. World Transfer Agency
<br>
5. Petrov van der Deathface
<br>
6. Battle of Quillian Square
<br>
7. Kindergarten Kops
</p>
<div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>Collected Writings and Letters of Ignatius Clivowycz</h2>
<p>The <b>Collected Writings and Letters of Ignatius Clivowycz</b> is a slim volume of content
compiled, edited, and self-published by Ignatius Clivowycz, a prominent Disquietist leader
and citizen of the First Quartile<sup>1</sup>. Although presented as a compilation of his extant
writings, scholars now believe that most of the documents were written specifically for
this publication. For one, the flow and development of his arguments over the
<i>Collected Writings and Letters</i> is suspiciously coherent for a collection of ostensibly
unrelated content. For another, most of the letters are addressed to people who do not
actually exist.</p></div>
<p>Though undoubtedly a vanity project—it is painfully evident that Clivowycz is trying
rather too hard to seem wise—historians have found the <i>Collected Writings and Letters</i>
to be an invaluable historical resource, as Clivowycz's rambling banality belies numerous
pearls of insight into the political events in which he was involved. Most notable among
these are his description of his founding of the
Circle of Fifths<sup>2</sup> and his eerily accurate
prediction, not only of the Genocide of the Second Quartile<sup>3</sup>, but of the specific
circumstances of his own death in the Genocide. Various commentators,
Petrov van der Deathface<sup>4</sup> among them, have observed that if Clivowycz knew he was going
to die on his ill-fated trip to the Second Quartile, he could have chosen not go. Thus,
they concluded, Clivowycz's death was probably faked to add an air of mystery to the
<i>Collected Writings and Letters</i>.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Sir Gareth, scholar-prince of Haven Rock</p></span>
<p><i>Citations:</i><br>
1. First Quartile
<br>
2. The Disquietist "Circle of Fifths" Revisited
<br>
3. Genocide of the Second Quartile
<br>
4. Petrov van der Deathface
</p>
<div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>Lega the Hamhanded</h2>
<p>Following the Quartile Reformation, <b>Legaria Porkins</b> saw her rise to power as the
first and current <b>elected governor of the Third Quartile</b>. If you've forgotten
that the Third Quartile even exists, that's no accident. Under Porkins'
leadership, the Third Quartile has remained absent from nearly all major Republic
conflicts.</p></div>
<p>Porkins has taken a strictly neutral stance on Remigrationism, signing nonaggression
pacts with Remigrationist leaders such as Uriopoges the Wiseass<sup>1</sup> along with resistance
leaders such as Petrov van der Deathface<sup>2</sup>. In her first address to the Republic
after these pacts, she stated the Third Quartile would not participate in the conflict
in order to devote more time and resources into foosball, the Quartile's national sport.</p>
<p>Porkins is known to participate in competitive kickboxing. Many claim she has used
fist-enlarging drugs to get an edge against her rival, the Hand of Justice<sup>3</sup> in
the ring. This conspiracy, along with an unfortunately exploitable surname,
has left her with the nickname <b>Lega the Hamhanded</b>. Her supporters deny
all allegations, but have refused to comment when questioned with the fact that
despite over 200 public broadcasts, Porkins' hands have <i>never once appeared on
camera</i>. Coincidence? Just think about it.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>~ Khan, Alexandra</p></span>
<p><i>Citations:</i><br>
1. Uriopoges the Wiseass
<br>
2. Petrov van der Deathface
<br>
3. Hand of Justice
</p>
<div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>Quadrant Cup</h2>
<p><i>What is the Quadrant Cup? Well, that's an easy one, sport. It's your one and only
Social Responsibility™! At the end of the day, the hardworking men and women
of the First Quartile deserve an affordable dinner they can depend on --
and that's where you come in!</i></p></div>
<p><i>Close one eye, and wink into the twinkling eyes of Urion Opogester<sup>1</sup>. Now
close 'em both and race headfirst into</i> <b>Megameat</b><i>'s gaping maw, champ! You'll make
Honorious Rightson<sup>2</sup> proud!</i></p>
<p><i>You've had </i>your<i> sip of life, and now it's time for life to sip back. Oh, come on now... you wouldn't want to Megameat to summon the Kops<sup>3</sup>...</i></p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Konrade Krunch</p></span>
<p><i>Citations:</i><br>
1. Uriopoges the Wiseass
<br>
2. Honorius Rightson
<br>
3. Kindergarten Kops
</p>
<div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>The WYZZYIRD</h2>
<p>The <b>Wavelength Yocto-Zig-Zag Yodel Infiltration/Relocation Division</b>, or <b>WYZZYIRD</b> for short, is alleged to be a clandestine military unit operating out of the enigmatic Mystery District<sup>1</sup> in the Third Quartile. While the scant evidence of their existence (mostly notes from the private journals of Her Quartness Quartilord Lega<sup>2</sup>) is disputed academically only in hushed tones, the WYZZYIRD remains a popular topic of urban legend.</p></div>
<p>The central narratives of the WYZZYIRD legends claim that its operatives use yodelling at absurdly high frequencies -- their titular "wavelength yocto-zig-zag yodel" -- in order to quantum tunnel through walls or across great distances in order to infiltrate their target's location, where they use their yodelling to suck their target through a wormhole to the dreaded Outlands<sup>3</sup>. Some allege that the WYZZYIRD is a division of the World Transfer Agency<sup>4</sup>, but as in all things WYZZYIRD, available facts are scant.</p>
<p>One of the most popular variations on the WYZZYIRD urban legend is the claim that Joculus the Red<sup>5</sup> is one of their operatives. This tall tale is likely inspired by Joculus' boasts about his ability to hide a burrito in any fridge, even fridges unreachable to mortal men, combined with his unsettling track record of having never lied.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>Signed, the Right Honorable Honorius Rightson, Esq., PrR, WKD</p></span>
<p><i>Citations:</i><br>
1. Mystery District
<br>
2. Lega the Hamhanded
<br>
3. The Outlands
<br>
4. World Transfer Agency
<br>
5. Joculus the Red
</p>
<div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>Chloroveritase</h2>
<p><b>Chloroveritase</b> is a substance exuded by gattling ducks<sup>1</sup> during weapon discharge. Despite its humble origins as a byproduct of avian assault troops, chloroveritase has become an immensely important substance due to its curious ability to make things see-through. It sees use by the World Transfer Agency<sup>2</sup> as a screening method, which has caused some controversy given that the see-through effect sometimes does not wear off, causing transferred persons grief when their clothes or skin is made permanently transparent.</p></div>
<p>Though Petrov van der Deathface<sup>3</sup>'s eponymous condition is officially attributed by the resistance to WTA malice, no known WTA procedure applies chloroveritase only to the facial skin and muscle, and so despite the popular appeal of such stories, scholars generally consider it to have been self-inflicted for political reasons.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Signed, the Right Honorable Honorius Rightson, Esq., PrR, WKD</p></span>
<p><i>Citations:</i><br>
1. Gattling ducks
<br>
2. World Transfer Agency
<br>
3. Petrov van der Deathface
</p>
<div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>First Quartile</h2>
<p>The <b>First Quartile</b> is one of four Quartiles that comprise the Risible Republic. It
enjoys a somewhat advantaged position over the other three Quartiles in Republic politics.
Analysts attribute this mostly to force projection abilities: the World Transfer Agency<sup>1</sup>,
based primarily in the First Quartile, has shifted significantly pro-First Quartile in
recent years. Due to the First Quartile's central position in the Republic, both
geographically and politically, it has accumulated no small amount of cultural influence
as well. This can be seen most prominently in the recent growth of Remigrationism in
Disquietist circles.</p></div>
<p>The national deity of the First Quartile is Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter<sup>2</sup>. This
state of affairs has caused no small amount of consternation among the other Quartiles,
particularly over such phrases in Teramince's holy book as "Go forth among the infidels
and harvest bloodily their precious, precious organs"—a command which the First Quartile
administration officially claims is a metaphor. That said, some scholars have noted that
the waitlist for organ donations is significantly shorter in the First Quartile, even
after controlling for population and socio-economic status. The controversy is ongoing at
the time of writing.</p>
<p>The First Quartile boasts its share of notable personages. These include such figures as
spiritual leader Uriopoges the Wiseass<sup>3</sup>, noted as the founder of Remigrationism; the
kickboxer known as the Hand of Justice<sup>4</sup>, who claims to be a prophet of Teramince; and
Petrov van der Deathface<sup>5</sup>, despite his attempts to eradicate all traces of his past.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Ersatz Scrivener</p></span>
<p><i>Citations:</i><br>
1. World Transfer Agency
<br>
2. Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter
<br>
3. Uriopoges the Wiseass
<br>
4. Hand of Justice
<br>
5. Petrov van der Deathface
</p>
<div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>Mystery District</h2>
<p>In every map made of the Republic, on the far side of the Third Quartile, there
is a small sector conspicuously missing. On some maps, you might see it labeled
the <b>Mystery District</b>, though this is simply a name given to the region by
fans of conspiracies surrounding it.</p></div>
<p>Due to massive walls bordering the district and an estimated 250 personnel on
patrol around the perimeter, no one from outside the district has ever been
inside. As such, absolutely nothing is known about its purpose. Conspirators
have their theories, however:</p>
<p>- As the Mystery District lies on the outer boundary of the Republic, many have
speculated ties to The Outlands<sup>1</sup>. Some believe The WYZZYIRD<sup>2</sup> is involved
in the district as well, but no one who has furthered this theory has ever
been heard from again.</p>
<p>- Perhaps a more reasonable theory is that of resistance leader
Petrov van der Deathface<sup>3</sup>, who believes the district to be the secret cult
worshipping grounds of the Clown-God of Slaughter<sup>4</sup>.</p>
<p>- Third Quartile officials have assured the public that there is nothing suspicious
going on in the district, but of course one should take these assurances with
a grain of salt.</p>
<p>Three months ago, First Quartile<sup>5</sup> leaders said they were preparing an
investigation into the Mystery District, but no action has been taken by them
since then.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>~ Khan, Alexandra</p></span>
<p><i>Citations:</i><br>
1. The Outlands
<br>
2. The WYZZYIRD
<br>
3. Petrov van der Deathface
<br>
4. Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter
<br>
5. First Quartile
</p>
<div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter</h2>
<p>According to canon, Teramince ascended over the former Clown-God of Slaughter,
Gigamince, by baking him into a casserole of cosmic proportions and eating
him to gain his power. Once a year, recalling her hilarious feast, Teramince's
sanguine hunger waxes, and wanes only with a leviathan sip of the
Quadrant Cup<sup>1</sup>.</p></div>
<p>On this occasion, Teramince takes physical form from the shadows cast by the
Circus Moon<sup>2</sup> in order to walk amidst mortals and record flavor notes for
her annual people-tasting. Although unconfirmed by any written report, Uriopoges<sup>3</sup> is fabled to have become her high priest after offering her a nibble of his index finger, whereupon she pronounced him "...a man of excellent taste and flavor."</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Konrade Krunch</p></span>
<p><i>Citations:</i><br>
1. Quadrant Cup
<br>
2. Circus Moon
<br>
3. Uriopoges the Wiseass
</p>
<div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>Doctrine of Imbalance</h2>
<p>The <b>Doctrine of Imbalance</b> of Uriopoges the Wiseass is one of the so-called "secret doctrines" of Remigrationism. It was unknown to Remigrationism scholarship until the recent discovery that the Five-Hundred Injunctions found in the <i>Transactions</i><sup>1</sup> spell out an acrostic message. This was likely overlooked for so long because of the marginal nature of the <i>Transactions</i>. Initial reactions were highly skeptical -- the Injunctions are hurried marginal notes, after all -- but the improbability has convinced the field that the Doctrine is legitimate and inspired a search for other hidden doctrines in Uriopoges' writings.</p></div>
<p>In relation to other Remigrationist doctrines, the Doctrine of Imbalance qualifies the idea of the cycle of life to suggest that the distribution of souls in the cycle is not even, but is heavily concentrated to one side. It does not figure largely into public Remigrationist discourse, leaving the question open as to how much significance it could possibly have and raising questions about why Uriopoges went to such lengths to hide it in the <i>Transactions</i>.</p>
<p>While the tall tales of the "secret doctrines" certainly add that <i>je ne sais quoi</i> to the otherwise revolting doctrines of Remigrationism, it is in my opinion an unprofitable avenue of Remigrationist scholarship that distracts from more pressing issues, such as Rightson's<sup>2</sup> excellent recent essay on the proposals for a Reformed Remigrationism put forth by Joculus the Red<sup>3</sup> in his latest essay-length graffiti on the walls of the Mystery District<sup>4</sup>.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Signed, the Right Honorable Honorius Rightson, Esq., PrR, WKD</p></span>
<p><i>Citations:</i><br>
1. Transactions of the Clamorous Convosembly, Vol. 5
<br>
2. Honorius Rightson
<br>
3. Joculus the Red
<br>
4. Mystery District
</p>
<div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>Honorius Rightson</h2>
<p>The <b>Right Honorable Honorius Rightson, Esq., PrR, WKD</b> is a prominent scholar of
Disquietist history and culture. His early life was spent in the Third Quartile, but he
soon moved to the University of Haven Rock in the First Quartile<sup>1</sup> to pursue a career in
scholarship. He received the degree of Practitioner of the Rock for his thesis,
"The Implications of Grammatical Irregularities in Opogester's<sup>2</sup>
<i>Transactions</i><sup>3</sup>." After
only three years of apprenticeship, he claimed the title of Wise Knower of Doctrine in
the traditional way (that is, besting his former mentor in single combat and seizing his
mentor's title), thereby gaining full professership. </p></div>
<p>Rightson's scholarly work of late has focused on Remigrationism as a cultural force,
particularly with respect to its impact on Disquietism. Of particular note is his work
with Jay Gubbins, the self-proclaimed prophet of
Teramince<sup>4</sup> and self-styled Hand of Justice<sup>5</sup>.
Although Rightson's research was able to provide valuable insight into Remigrationism,
Gubbins's instability led him to believe that Rightson was Teramince himself.
Because of Gubbins's influence in Remigrationist circles, it is not unusual for them to
think Rightson is their god<sup>6</sup> in disguise, and he is often invoked in the rites
surrounding the Quadrant Cup<sup>7</sup>.</p>
<p>In honor of the sacrifices he has made in the line of his scholarly duties, this
Encyclopedia is dedicated to him.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Lord Gareth, scholar-tyrant of Haven Rock</p></span>
<p><i>Citations:</i><br>
1. First Quartile
<br>
2. Uriopoges the Wiseass
<br>
3. Transactions of the Clamorous Convosembly, Vol. 5
<br>
4. Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter
<br>
5. Hand of Justice
<br>
6. God
<br>
7. Quadrant Cup
</p>
<div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>Petrov van der Deathface</h2>
<p>Okay, we get it. Deathface <i>allegedly</i> single-handedly wiped out no less than
twenty two Kops<sup>1</sup> in the Battle of Quillian Square<sup>2</sup>. Deathface
has a kill count greater than every other First Quartile<sup>3</sup> soldier's, combined.
We get it, Deathface was a legendary war hero. The glory of his mustache rivaled
that of Mustachius, the highest of the mustache dieties. But have you ever stopped
to think about how ridiculous those stories are? One single man, accomplishing all
Deathface did in his tragically short-lived life? It's preposterous! The man named
<b>Petrov van der Deathface</b> is nothing but a <i>sham</i>, a marketing ploy to sell
more t-shirts!</p></div>
<p>Not convinced? Then perhaps consider the fact that Deathface does not have a face.
Everyone knows that real people have faces. Therefore, Petrov van der Deathface
is not a real person. Q. E. Motherfucking. D.</p>
<p>Grab a copy of the Doctrine of Imbalance<sup>4</sup> from your local library and give it
a read. It explicitly states in there that Deathface is but a myth. Or something
similar, anyways. Point is, you've all been had! Open your eyes and don't give
into this scam!</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>~ Ersatz Scrivener</p></span>
<p><i>Citations:</i><br>
1. Kindergarten Kops
<br>
2. Battle of Quillian Square
<br>
3. First Quartile
<br>
4. Doctrine of Imbalance
</p>
<div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>Westexico</h2>
<p>Westexico is a province on the other side of First Quartile<sup>1</sup> that serves as
God<sup>2</sup>'s burrito orchard. While it is generally respected that God<sup>3</sup>'s
burrito recipe is simply <i>divine</i>, few other sentient entities have the
sophisticated resources or knowledge necessary to construct a suitable tree to
produce them, like God<sup>4</sup> intended.</p></div>
<p>Because of the logistical problems presented by tunnelling to the other side
of the continent, burritos are a very scare resource. This scarcity makes them a
natural choice for currency in the four Quartiles, accepted anywhere in the Quartiles following the
Penultimate Compact<sup>5</sup>. Their use as currency has a few peculiar consequences -- first,
that price of a burrito is as unchanging as God<sup>6</sup> himself; and second, that one's want for
money grows proportionally with their hunger.</p>
<p>Some conjecture that The WYZZYIRD<sup>7</sup>, if it exists, is naught but a get-rich-quick scheme
with the eventual goal of exfiltrating God<sup>8</sup>'s entire Westexican Reserve, ordinarily shared
only with his elect. Similarly, there exist rumors of the Hand of Justice<sup>9</sup> plotting a
similar heist.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Konrade Krunch</p></span>
<p><i>Citations:</i><br>
1. First Quartile
<br>
2. God
<br>
3. God
<br>
4. God
<br>
5. Penultimate Compact
<br>
6. God
<br>
7. The WYZZYIRD
<br>
8. God
<br>
9. Hand of Justice
</p>
<div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>Circus Moon</h2>
<p>In Disquietist folk tales, the "Circus Moon" heralds the arrival of Teramince<sup>1</sup> to the physical world. According to other myths, the light reflected from the moon itself is (by means curiously unspecified) sufficient to provide a form for Teramince's body. Accounts of the Circus Moon's appearance vary greatly, but commonly speak of a "stretching" or "warping", as if by a funhouse mirror. According to legend, its appearence is usually accompanied by corvids emitting the occasional "Wilhelm Scream."</p></div>
<p>Because no photographs exist of the Circus Moon and that no physical explanation has been offered for its appearance, it is clear that the Circus Moon is little more than a Disquietist fiction. Nonetheless, the tales appear to influence a great number of Disquietist traditions: even the Order of the Black Ladder<sup>2</sup> will quickly assemble for an impromptu barbequeue in the event of a supposed sighting.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Ersatz Scrivener</p></span>
<p><i>Citations:</i><br>
1. Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter
<br>
2. Order of the Black Ladder
</p>
<div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>Hand of Justice</h2>
<p>My dear Jay,</p></div>
<p>I hope this letter finds you well as you prepare for the Thirteenth Annual Quadrant Cup<sup>1</sup> next month. Unfortunately, I must turn down your speaking request; my research is too pressing at this juncture to engage the week-long ceremonies of the Cup and prepare a lecture for the occasion.</p>
<p>I assume you have already read, or otherwise know about, my recent papers on the "secret doctrines" of Remigrationism. Though I cannot take your offer of a speaking engagement, if you have an afternoon to spare from your unending dispute with Ms Legaria<sup>2</sup>, I should be ever so greatful to discuss the recent discoveries with you. We may be much closer than anticipated to uncovering what old Urion, God<sup>3</sup> rest his soul, knew about the Genocide of the Second Quartile<sup>4</sup> prior to its occurrence. I have some theories I am eager to share about his relation to Clivowycz<sup>5</sup>.</p>
<p>Please send your response to me by letter this time. I have told you several times already: I am not Teramince<sup>6</sup>. I will not receive your response if you send it via prayer, nor will I be aware of its contents if you attach it to a carrier pigeon and toss it into a meat grinder like you did last time.</p>
<p>Your friend,</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Honorious Rightson, Esq.</p></span>
<p><i>Citations:</i><br>
1. Quadrant Cup
<br>
2. Lega the Hamhanded
<br>
3. God
<br>
4. Genocide of the Second Quartile
<br>
5. Collected Writings and Letters of Ignatius Clivowycz
<br>
6. Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter
</p>
<div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>The Jocular Revolution</h2>
<p>The Jocular Revolution<sup>1</sup> is the name being used for the sudden upheaval of the past
few days. Joculus the Red<sup>2</sup> has apparently returned, leading operatives who some claim are
The WYZZYIRD<sup>3</sup>, to overthrow <b>Megameat the Doomgoblet</b> [sic] and restore balance to
the Quartiles. I've seen reports that Petrov van der Deathface<sup>4</sup> is among them.
Uriopoges the Wiseass<sup>5</sup> has apparently been slain in combat, and
Teramince<sup>6</sup> manifested only to be yodeled into
The Outlands<sup>7</sup>. Information is currently vague, hard to come by, and contradictory, but
if even a fraction of these reports are true, the very course of history is changing as I
pen these words.</p></div>
<p>May a brighter future await us.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Lord Gareth, scholar-tyrant of Haven Rock</p></span>
<p><i>Citations:</i><br>
1. The Jocular Revolution
<br>
2. Joculus the Red
<br>
3. The WYZZYIRD
<br>
4. Petrov van der Deathface
<br>
5. Uriopoges the Wiseass
<br>
6. Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter
<br>
7. The Outlands
</p>
<div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>Trek and Remigration of the Antifestivites</h2>
<p>Among those who believe in remigrationism are the <b>Antifestivities</b>, a
less-extreme group known for their condemnation of practices encouraged by
Joculus the Red<sup>1</sup>. Although they insist that they're "nothing like those
idiots," leveraging the fact that they do not worship the
Clown-God<sup>2</sup>, they are usually lumped together
with the rest of the Disquietists.</p></div>
<p>The Antifestivities participate in the ongoing remigration, but where are they
migrating to? Some believe they are preparing to take back their homeland, a party
store in the southern parts of the First Quartile<sup>3</sup> which used to serve as their
office headquarters before the Quartile Reformation. Their name, the <i>Antifestivities</i>,
is misleading; many people mistakenly believe they are against festivities in general.
In reality, though, items such as beer, tortilla chips, and pizza delivery coupons
account for over half of what they take with them on their journeys.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>~ Khan, Alexandra</p></span>
<p><i>Citations:</i><br>
1. Joculus the Red
<br>
2. Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter
<br>
3. First Quartile
</p>
<div style="page-break-inside:avoid;">
<h2>Gattling ducks</h2>
<p><i>This entry hasn't been written yet.</i></p></div>
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<p><span style="font-size:1.5em;">Lexicon Alpha</span></p>
<p>
<a href="../contents/">Contents</a> &mdash;
<a href="../rules/">Rules</a> &mdash;
<a href="../formatting/">Formatting</a> &mdash;
<a href="../session/">Session</a> &mdash;
<a href="../statistics/">Statistics</a>
</p>
<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>Rules</h1>
<ol>
<li>At the beginning of the game, you will be provided with a <i>topic statement</i> that sets the tone for the game. Use it for inspiration and a stepping-stone into shaping the world of the Lexicon.</li>
<li>Each round, you will be assigned an <i>index</i>, a grouping of letters. Your entry must alphabetize under that index.<ol>
<li>Each index has a number of open slots equal to the number of players, which are taken up by article titles when an article is written in that index or a citation is made to an unwritten article, or <i>phantom</i>. If there are no open slots in your index, you must write the article for a phantom in that index.</li>
<li>"The" and "A" aren't counted in indexing.</li></ol></li>
<li>Once you've picked an article title, write your article on that subject.<ol>
<li>There are no hard and fast rules about style. Try to sound like an encyclopedia entry or the overview section at the top of a wiki article.</li>
<li>You must respect and not contradict any factual content of any posted articles. You may introduce new facts that place things in a new light, provide alternative interpretations, or flesh out unexplained details in unexpected ways; but you must not <i>contradict</i> what has been previously established as fact.</li>
<li>Aim for around 200-300 words. Going over is okay, but be reasonable.</li></ol></li>
<li>Your article must cite other articles in the Lexicon. Sometimes these citations will be to phantoms, articles that have not been written yet.<ol>
<li>On the first turn, your article must cite <i>exactly two</i> phantom articles.</li>
<li>On subsequent turns, your article must cite <i>exactly two</i> phantom articles, either already-cited phantoms or new ones. Your article must also cite <i>at least one</i> written article.</li>
<li>On the penultimate turn, you must cite <i>exactly one</i> phantom article and <i>at least two</i> written articles.</li>
<li>On the final turn, you must cite <i>at least three</i> written articles.</li>
<li>You may not cite an entry you wrote. You may cite phantoms you have cited before.</li>
<li>Once you cite a phantom, you cannot choose to write it if you write an article for that index later.</li></ol></li>
<p><b>Ersatz Scrivener.</b> In the course of the game, it may come to pass that a scholar is assigned an index in which no slots are available to them, because they have cited all the available phantoms in their previous articles. When this happens, the player instead writes their article as Ersatz Scrivener, radical skeptic. Ersatz does not believe in the existence of whatever he is writing about, no matter how obvious it seems to others or how central it is in the developing history of the world. All references, testimony, etc. with regard to its existence are tragic delusion at best or malicious lies at worst. Unlike the other scholars, Ersatz does not treat the research of his peers as fact, because he does not believe he has peers. Players writing articles as Ersatz are encouraged to name and shame the work of the misguided amateurs collaborating with him.</p>
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<p><span style="font-size:1.5em;">Lexicon Alpha</span></p>
<p>
<a href="../contents/">Contents</a> &mdash;
<a href="../rules/">Rules</a> &mdash;
<a href="../formatting/">Formatting</a> &mdash;
<a href="../session/">Session</a> &mdash;
<a href="../statistics/">Statistics</a>
</p>
<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>Lexicon Alpha</h1>
<p>Lexicon Alpha was played March 11 - 19, 2017.</p></div>
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# Player: HM
# Turn: 2
# Title: Battle of Quillian Square
Quillian Square: birthplace of the "Sloppy Joe" and hometown of military
general Septimus the Eighth. Now a destitute nuclear wasteland, thanks to some
kids and a personal grudge. Since I don't get paid enough to cover any of the
important battles, I'll take the opportunity to set the facts straight on what
did and did not happen in the Battle of Quillian Square.
**What happened?**
• The square was ransacked by a group of mechanized infants known as the [[Kindergarten Kops]].
It is unclear what the motive was behind the attack, but expert witness
"Sloppy" Joe believes it was a pitiful attempt to challenge
the monopoly of the Sloppy Joe on the sandwich market.
• The Battle of Quillian Square featured the first, and only, ever recorded use of
[[gattling ducks|Gattling ducks]] in military warfare.
**What did not happen?**
• First Quartile military control was //not// reduced in Quillian Square or any
surrounding area as a result of the battle.
• Radiation from the battle has //not// had any affect on the nutritional value of
Sloppy Joes.
The Battle of Quillian Square saw a great, thriving town reduced to rubble and
ruins, although sources suggest you can still purchase a Sloppy Joe from
Sloppy Joe's, only 5.99!
//This article was not sponsored in any way by Sloppy Joe's Sloppy Joe sandwiches, the official//
//sandwich of the 13th annual [[Quadrant Cup]].//
~~ Khan, Alexandra

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# Player: TVB
# Turn: 6
# Title: Chloroveritase
**Chloroveritase** is a substance exuded by [[gattling ducks|Gattling ducks]] during weapon discharge. Despite its humble origins as a byproduct of avian assault troops, chloroveritase has become an immensely important substance due to its curious ability to make things see-through. It sees use by the [[World Transfer Agency]] as a screening method, which has caused some controversy given that the see-through effect sometimes does not wear off, causing transferred persons grief when their clothes or skin is made permanently transparent.
Though [[Petrov van der Deathface]]'s eponymous condition is officially attributed by the resistance to WTA malice, no known WTA procedure applies chloroveritase only to the facial skin and muscle, and so despite the popular appeal of such stories, scholars generally consider it to have been self-inflicted for political reasons.
~ Signed, the Right Honorable Honorius Rightson, Esq., PrR, WKD

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# Player: NVB
# Turn: 5
# Title: Collected Writings and Letters of Ignatius Clivowycz
The **Collected Writings and Letters of Ignatius Clivowycz** is a slim volume of content
compiled, edited, and self-published by Ignatius Clivowycz, a prominent Disquietist leader
and citizen of the [[First Quartile]]. Although presented as a compilation of his extant
writings, scholars now believe that most of the documents were written specifically for
this publication. For one, the flow and development of his arguments over the
//Collected Writings and Letters// is suspiciously coherent for a collection of ostensibly
unrelated content. For another, most of the letters are addressed to people who do not
actually exist.
Though undoubtedly a vanity project—it is painfully evident that Clivowycz is trying
rather too hard to seem wise—historians have found the //Collected Writings and Letters//
to be an invaluable historical resource, as Clivowycz's rambling banality belies numerous
pearls of insight into the political events in which he was involved. Most notable among
these are his description of his founding of the
[[Circle of Fifths|The Disquietist "Circle of Fifths" Revisited]] and his eerily accurate
prediction, not only of the [[Genocide of the Second Quartile]], but of the specific
circumstances of his own death in the Genocide. Various commentators,
[[Petrov van der Deathface]] among them, have observed that if Clivowycz knew he was going
to die on his ill-fated trip to the Second Quartile, he could have chosen not go. Thus,
they concluded, Clivowycz's death was probably faked to add an air of mystery to the
//Collected Writings and Letters//.
~ Sir Gareth, scholar-prince of Haven Rock

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# Player: TVB
# Turn: 7
# Title: Doctrine of Imbalance
The **Doctrine of Imbalance** of Uriopoges the Wiseass is one of the so-called "secret doctrines" of Remigrationism. It was unknown to Remigrationism scholarship until the recent discovery that the Five-Hundred Injunctions found in the [[//Transactions//|Transactions of the Clamorous Convosembly, Vol. 5]] spell out an acrostic message. This was likely overlooked for so long because of the marginal nature of the //Transactions//. Initial reactions were highly skeptical -- the Injunctions are hurried marginal notes, after all -- but the improbability has convinced the field that the Doctrine is legitimate and inspired a search for other hidden doctrines in Uriopoges' writings.
In relation to other Remigrationist doctrines, the Doctrine of Imbalance qualifies the idea of the cycle of life to suggest that the distribution of souls in the cycle is not even, but is heavily concentrated to one side. It does not figure largely into public Remigrationist discourse, leaving the question open as to how much significance it could possibly have and raising questions about why Uriopoges went to such lengths to hide it in the //Transactions//.
While the tall tales of the "secret doctrines" certainly add that //je ne sais quoi// to the otherwise revolting doctrines of Remigrationism, it is in my opinion an unprofitable avenue of Remigrationist scholarship that distracts from more pressing issues, such as [[Rightson's|Honorius Rightson]] excellent recent essay on the proposals for a Reformed Remigrationism put forth by [[Joculus the Red]] in his latest essay-length graffiti on the walls of the [[Mystery District]].
~ Signed, the Right Honorable Honorius Rightson, Esq., PrR, WKD

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# Player: HM
# Turn: 3
# Title: Double-Eighth Hexadecisection
To some, the Double-Eighth Hexadecisection was a godsend. No longer were there
single big governments ruling over each of the four quartiles, but rather
four smaller governments in place of each original. Some argue that without this
dramatic shift, we would never have seen the fall of the infamous [[Joculus the Red]].
To others, the Double-Eighth Hexadecisection was the single worst piece of
legislation in the history of the quartiles since the [[Penultimate Compact]].
Originally, there was simplicity, a harmony of four governments working together
for the benefit of all. Now, there is chaos, a political frenzy that has rendered
the legislative process obsolete. Initially, some argued that the newly-created
factions such as the [[Circle of Fifths|The Disquietist "Circle of Fifths" Revisited]]
were radical and unorthodox. For reasons unknown, the voices of opposition have
grown quieter over the years.
And to a select few, the Double-Eighth Hexadecisection remains one of many
phrases impossible to say correctly on the first try.
~~ Khan, Alexandra

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# Player: NVB
# Turn: 6
# Title: First Quartile
The **First Quartile** is one of four Quartiles that comprise the Risible Republic. It
enjoys a somewhat advantaged position over the other three Quartiles in Republic politics.
Analysts attribute this mostly to force projection abilities: the [[World Transfer Agency]],
based primarily in the First Quartile, has shifted significantly pro-First Quartile in
recent years. Due to the First Quartile's central position in the Republic, both
geographically and politically, it has accumulated no small amount of cultural influence
as well. This can be seen most prominently in the recent growth of Remigrationism in
Disquietist circles.
The national deity of the First Quartile is [[Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter]]. This
state of affairs has caused no small amount of consternation among the other Quartiles,
particularly over such phrases in Teramince's holy book as "Go forth among the infidels
and harvest bloodily their precious, precious organs"—a command which the First Quartile
administration officially claims is a metaphor. That said, some scholars have noted that
the waitlist for organ donations is significantly shorter in the First Quartile, even
after controlling for population and socio-economic status. The controversy is ongoing at
the time of writing.
The First Quartile boasts its share of notable personages. These include such figures as
spiritual leader [[Uriopoges the Wiseass]], noted as the founder of Remigrationism; the
kickboxer known as the [[Hand of Justice]], who claims to be a prophet of Teramince; and
[[Petrov van der Deathface]], despite his attempts to eradicate all traces of his past.
~ Ersatz Scrivener

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# Player: HM
# Turn: 4
# Title: God
A being known by all and agreed upon by none. Most widely known for his holy text,
the Rules page. While scholars previously believed God to be largely absent from
the workings of the world, new evidence points to his involvement in many key
events in recent times.
In the aftermath of the [[Genocide of the Second Quartile]], graffiti has been
seen on various buildings with messages such as "God was here." It is
unclear whether God had a direct influence on the massacre, or if this is
just another attempt by [[Joculus the Red]] to get revenge on God for stealing
his burrito from the office fridge.
God's allegiance has been debated, though evidence suggests he may lean slightly
toward Disquietism. "The First Quartile has most of the resources and power," stated
God, when questioned about the subject, "and the Disquietists, and the Order of
the Black Ladder in particular, are resisting them."
God has been cited numerous times as the divine inspiration for such radical works
as [[Uriopoges|Uriopoges the Wiseass]]' [[Doctrine of Imbalance]], though he continues
to remain silent on these issues.
~~ Khan, Alexandra

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# Player: TVB
# Turn: 8
# Title: Hand of Justice
My dear Jay,
I hope this letter finds you well as you prepare for the Thirteenth Annual [[Quadrant Cup]] next month. Unfortunately, I must turn down your speaking request; my research is too pressing at this juncture to engage the week-long ceremonies of the Cup and prepare a lecture for the occasion.
I assume you have already read, or otherwise know about, my recent papers on the "secret doctrines" of Remigrationism. Though I cannot take your offer of a speaking engagement, if you have an afternoon to spare from your unending dispute with [[Ms Legaria|Lega the Hamhanded]], I should be ever so greatful to discuss the recent discoveries with you. We may be much closer than anticipated to uncovering what old Urion, [[God]] rest his soul, knew about the [[Genocide of the Second Quartile]] prior to its occurrence. I have some theories I am eager to share about his relation to [[Clivowycz|Collected Writings and Letters of Ignatius Clivowycz]].
Please send your response to me by letter this time. I have told you several times already: I am not [[Teramince|Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter]]. I will not receive your response if you send it via prayer, nor will I be aware of its contents if you attach it to a carrier pigeon and toss it into a meat grinder like you did last time.
Your friend,
~ Honorious Rightson, Esq.

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# Player: NVB
# Turn: 7
# Title: Honorius Rightson
The **Right Honorable Honorius Rightson, Esq., PrR, WKD** is a prominent scholar of
Disquietist history and culture. His early life was spent in the Third Quartile, but he
soon moved to the University of Haven Rock in the [[First Quartile]] to pursue a career in
scholarship. He received the degree of Practitioner of the Rock for his thesis,
"The Implications of Grammatical Irregularities in [[Opogester's|Uriopoges the Wiseass]]
[[//Transactions//|Transactions of the Clamorous Convosembly, Vol. 5]]." After
only three years of apprenticeship, he claimed the title of Wise Knower of Doctrine in
the traditional way (that is, besting his former mentor in single combat and seizing his
mentor's title), thereby gaining full professership.
Rightson's scholarly work of late has focused on Remigrationism as a cultural force,
particularly with respect to its impact on Disquietism. Of particular note is his work
with Jay Gubbins, the self-proclaimed prophet of
[[Teramince|Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter]] and self-styled [[Hand of Justice]].
Although Rightson's research was able to provide valuable insight into Remigrationism,
Gubbins's instability led him to believe that Rightson was Teramince himself.
Because of Gubbins's influence in Remigrationist circles, it is not unusual for them to
think Rightson is their [[god|God]] in disguise, and he is often invoked in the rites
surrounding the [[Quadrant Cup]].
In honor of the sacrifices he has made in the line of his scholarly duties, this
Encyclopedia is dedicated to him.
~ Lord Gareth, scholar-tyrant of Haven Rock

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# Player: NVB
# Turn: 8
# Title: The Jocular Revolution
The [[Jocular Revolution|The Jocular Revolution]] is the name being used for the sudden upheaval of the past
few days. [[Joculus the Red]] has apparently returned, leading operatives who some claim are
[[The WYZZYIRD]], to overthrow **Megameat the Doomgoblet** [sic] and restore balance to
the Quartiles. I've seen reports that [[Petrov van der Deathface]] is among them.
[[Uriopoges the Wiseass]] has apparently been slain in combat, and
[[Teramince|Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter]] manifested only to be yodeled into
[[The Outlands]]. Information is currently vague, hard to come by, and contradictory, but
if even a fraction of these reports are true, the very course of history is changing as I
pen these words.
May a brighter future await us.
~ Lord Gareth, scholar-tyrant of Haven Rock

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# Player: TVB
# Turn: 1
# Title: Kindergarten Kops
The paramilitary force known as the **Kindergerten Kops** was a brutal enforcement mechanism of
the Fourth Quartile. With all the power of a mechanized mercenary army and all the diplomatic
skill of a class of kindergarteners, the mech-piloting toddlers of the Kops painted a bloody
swath across the chaos of the Reformation.
Full specifications of the Kops' armored chassis were never released to the public, but redacted
documents detail military-grade armor protecting critical sections such as joints and the
toddler pilot. Accounts of Kop raids recount several weapon types, including tear gas grenade
launchers, flamethrowers, gatling guns, and heavy artillery. Reports indicate that their weapons
were grafted to the chassis' arms, so it is likely that there were several distinct roles within the
Kindergarten Kops that specialized chassis were designed for.
Eyewitness testimony reports that Kindergarten Kops led the charge at the [[Battle of Quillian Square]]
that broke the resistance lines and resulted in the deaths of several opposition leaders, including
[[Petrov van der Deathface]].
~ Signed, the Right Honorable Honorius Rightson, Esq., PrR, WKD

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# Player: HM
# Turn: 5
# Title: Lega the Hamhanded
Following the Quartile Reformation, **Legaria Porkins** saw her rise to power as the
first and current **elected governor of the Third Quartile**. If you've forgotten
that the Third Quartile even exists, that's no accident. Under Porkins'
leadership, the Third Quartile has remained absent from nearly all major Republic
conflicts.
Porkins has taken a strictly neutral stance on Remigrationism, signing nonaggression
pacts with Remigrationist leaders such as [[Uriopoges the Wiseass]] along with resistance
leaders such as [[Petrov van der Deathface]]. In her first address to the Republic
after these pacts, she stated the Third Quartile would not participate in the conflict
in order to devote more time and resources into foosball, the Quartile's national sport.
Porkins is known to participate in competitive kickboxing. Many claim she has used
fist-enlarging drugs to get an edge against her rival, the [[Hand of Justice]] in
the ring. This conspiracy, along with an unfortunately exploitable surname,
has left her with the nickname **Lega the Hamhanded**. Her supporters deny
all allegations, but have refused to comment when questioned with the fact that
despite over 200 public broadcasts, Porkins' hands have //never once appeared on
camera//. Coincidence? Just think about it.
~~ Khan, Alexandra

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# Player: HM
# Turn: 6
# Title: Mystery District
In every map made of the Republic, on the far side of the Third Quartile, there
is a small sector conspicuously missing. On some maps, you might see it labeled
the **Mystery District**, though this is simply a name given to the region by
fans of conspiracies surrounding it.
Due to massive walls bordering the district and an estimated 250 personnel on
patrol around the perimeter, no one from outside the district has ever been
inside. As such, absolutely nothing is known about its purpose. Conspirators
have their theories, however:
- As the Mystery District lies on the outer boundary of the Republic, many have
speculated ties to [[The Outlands]]. Some believe [[The WYZZYIRD]] is involved
in the district as well, but no one who has furthered this theory has ever
been heard from again.
- Perhaps a more reasonable theory is that of resistance leader
[[Petrov van der Deathface]], who believes the district to be the secret cult
worshipping grounds of the [[Clown-God of Slaughter|Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter]].
- Third Quartile officials have assured the public that there is nothing suspicious
going on in the district, but of course one should take these assurances with
a grain of salt.
Three months ago, [[First Quartile]] leaders said they were preparing an
investigation into the Mystery District, but no action has been taken by them
since then.
~~ Khan, Alexandra

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# Player: NVB
# Turn: 1
# Title: Nose Ceremony
A Nose Ceremony is a rite of passage among the Disquietists. Young acolytes complete a series of three trials, at the end of which they are presented with a red rubber false nose. Their acceptance of the nose signifies their progression to the full status of clownhood. The exact details of the trials depend on the traditions and strictures of the Disquietist school, but typically the acolytes will face a trial of slapstick, a trial of stand-up comedy, and a trial in which they unsettle as many people as they can within a set time period.
Where Nose Ceremonies had traditionally been more freeform, recent years have seen a shift towards greater control by the acolyte's school. This can be traced to the infamous actions of [[Joculus the Red]], who, during his Nose Ceremony, murdered eighty people with nothing but an oversized shoe and a cream pie. In the outrage surrounding the massacre, Disquietist schools were forced to take measures to assure the public such an event would not occur again. A notable exception is the [[Order of the Black Ladder]], who, true to form, continue to respond to any and all complaints by filling the complainer's room with googly eyes while they sleep.
~ Sir Gareth, scholar-general of Haven Rock

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# Player: TVB
# Turn: 2
# Title: Order of the Black Ladder
The **Order of the Black Ladder** is an illustrious Disquietist school and quite possibly the most unorthodox. Despite pressure from the Circle of Fifths, the Order has maintained its status as the most unpredictable of the post-Reformation schools. Recent work by cryptoarchaeologists has unearthed evidence that Order meddling was responsible for the prank war whose escalation eventually resulted in the [[Battle of Quillian Square]], making them the second-deadliest Disquietist school by body count.
Black Ladder unorthodoxy has resulted in a number of bitter feuds with the more traditional Disquietists that control the Circle. One notable example is their stance on the [[World Transfer Agency]]: while traditional Disquietism has variously opposed or abetted the WTA, Black Ladder acolytes tend to view it with indifference, going so far as to gain employment in it only to abuse their security credentials for pranks. This and other conflicts characterize the Order's relationship to Disquietism at large (virtually all of the Injunctions found in [[Volume 5 of the //Transactions//|Transactions of the Clamorous Convosembly, Vol. 5]] are against Order practices).
~ Signed, the Right Honorable Honorius Rightson, Esq., PrR, WKD

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# Player: NVB
# Turn: 2
# Title: Penultimate Compact
The **Penultimate Compact** was a civil and religious agreement which marked the founding of the Risible Republic. It divided the Republic's terrain into several semi-autonomous administrative regions, with each region optimized for a specific economic activity. It was originally known as the "Ultimate Compact," reflecting the contemporaneous belief that the Compact would result in a perfect society with no further need for change. However, the initial design of the Republic resulted in an outbreak of sectarianism, which culminated in the Quartile Reformation and the utter destruction of all but four of the Republic's administrative regions. The first use of the name "Penultimate Compact" was by [[Lega the Hamhanded]] in her inaugural address.
Certain features of the original Compact have persisted to the current day. Most obviously are the Quartiles, the four surviving remnants of the original administrative regions. The post-Reformation Compact also preserved the [[World Transfer Agency]], in order to secure the Republic's ability to transport personnel and materials across the radioactive wastes of former regions. The WTA was originally distributed across the Republic, but post-Reformation, the bulk of its assets were concentrated in the [[First Quartile]].
~ Sir Gareth, scholar-general of Haven Rock

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# Player: HM
# Turn: 7
# Title: Petrov van der Deathface
Okay, we get it. Deathface //allegedly// single-handedly wiped out no less than
twenty two [[Kops|Kindergarten Kops]] in the [[Battle of Quillian Square]]. Deathface
has a kill count greater than every other [[First Quartile]] soldier's, combined.
We get it, Deathface was a legendary war hero. The glory of his mustache rivaled
that of Mustachius, the highest of the mustache dieties. But have you ever stopped
to think about how ridiculous those stories are? One single man, accomplishing all
Deathface did in his tragically short-lived life? It's preposterous! The man named
**Petrov van der Deathface** is nothing but a //sham//, a marketing ploy to sell
more t-shirts!
Not convinced? Then perhaps consider the fact that Deathface does not have a face.
Everyone knows that real people have faces. Therefore, Petrov van der Deathface
is not a real person. Q. E. Motherfucking. D.
Grab a copy of the [[Doctrine of Imbalance]] from your local library and give it
a read. It explicitly states in there that Deathface is but a myth. Or something
similar, anyways. Point is, you've all been had! Open your eyes and don't give
into this scam!
~~ Ersatz Scrivener

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# Player: TVB
# Turn: 3
# Title: Strontz-Mork Fish Trials
The so-called **Strontz-Mork Fish Trials** were a series of high-profile show trials institaged by enemies of the Disquietists within the Remigrationist camp. The Fish Trials resulted in the house arrests and subsequent political assassinations of [[prominent Disquietist leaders|Collected Writings and Letters of Ignatius Clivowycz]], which were variously blamed on other causes of death. Their characteristic name comes from the inexplicably successful defense, now known as the "Strontz-Mork Defense", that pointed to the victims' dead pet fish as evidence that the deaths had not been assassinations.
While the precise political motive for the Fish Trials remains unknown, "Sloppy Joe", the mysterious benefactor of the Remigrationist-affiliated annual ritual blood sacrifice known as the [[Quadrant Cup]] -- a euphemism for the massive cup situated between the four Quartiles whose true name is **Megameat the Doomgoblet** [sic] -- has generally been blamed in recent scholarly review of the topic. After all, the method of assassination matches the previous [[Second Quartile Genocide|Genocide of the Second Quartile]], which is known to have been started by "Sloppy Joe" in retalitation for the sharp drop in attendence caused by Disquietist fanfiction that made fun of the idea of grinding victims into mincemeat and selling them as sandwiches.
~Signed, the Right Honorable Honorius Rightson, Esq., PrR, WKD

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# Player: AB
# Turn: 4
# Title: The Outlands
Far past the edges of the quartiles, three blocks down from the neighborhood of
infinity, the Outlands are rumored to stretch. Those who the Outlands took,
the Outlands took forever.
Leaving the Outlands poses a considerable challenge. All the landscapes are
filmed in portrait. You can only turn left. The ping times are abysmal, and the
sun keeps burning out. Some wonder, licking bitter dew from the leaves of the
refutrees for sustenance, but they'll never leave.
//Staying// in the Outlands is no better. The lice are the size of shoes and the
only mixed drinks are rum and coke. As a courtesy to the wayward prisoner,
there is the occasional quantity of maple syrup, but only enough to make one's
sleeve sticky.
It is unclear who takes people to the Outlands, but the daring few who would
posit a guess universally blame the [[WYZZYIRD|The WYZZYIRD]] or the [[World Transfer Agency]].
(These bold souls are not often heard from again.)
Some suggest that the Outlands are an elaborate joke executed by
the [[Order of the Black Ladder]]. Would that we knew the punchline.
Wouldn't that we ever see it firsthand.
~Konrade Krunch

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# Player: NVB
# Turn: 3
# Title: Transactions of the Clamorous Convosembly, Vol. 5
The **Transactions of the Clamorous Convosembly**, known more concisely as the
**Transactions**, are a set of volumes detailing the running expenses of the
Clamorous Convosembly. The vast majority of these volumes are of minimal historical
interest, detailing such mundane matters as catering costs and reimbursements for prank
supplies (this last to be expected from any institutionalized gathering of Disquietists).
However, Volume 5 of the //Transactions// has taken on disproportionate significance
among historians. Volume 5 was compiled during the [[Uriopoges the Wiseass]]'s tragically
short-lived tenure as Convosembly treasurer and member of the Circle of Fifths.
Uriopoges, who is recognized mostly for his role as the founder of Remigrationism, had a
habit of making comments in the margins of the //Transactions//, ranging from insults
about other Convosembly members, to commentary on the proceedings, to moral statements
that foreshadow his later teachings. Contemporary scholars have focused particularly on
what have been termed his "Five-Hundred Injunctions," which mostly rage against the
practices of the [[Order of the Black Ladder]]. However, when constructing their
interpretations, these scholars tend to ignore that the Injunctions were written alongside
a truly epic list of prank reimbursements to Hisaguru the Silent, then-current head of the
Order. It should require only elementary reasoning to understand what might have made
Uriopoges so angry about this particular set of pranks.
Unfortunately, emphasis on the Injunctions has served to draw attention away from other
teachings first elucidated in the //Transactions//, such as his [[Doctrine of Imbalance]]
and the Parable of the Bird Thief.
~ Sir Gareth, scholar-general of Haven Rock

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# Player: HM
# Turn: 8
# Title: Trek and Remigration of the Antifestivites
Among those who believe in remigrationism are the **Antifestivities**, a
less-extreme group known for their condemnation of practices encouraged by
[[Joculus the Red]]. Although they insist that they're "nothing like those
idiots," leveraging the fact that they do not worship the
[[Clown-God|Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter]], they are usually lumped together
with the rest of the Disquietists.
The Antifestivities participate in the ongoing remigration, but where are they
migrating to? Some believe they are preparing to take back their homeland, a party
store in the southern parts of the [[First Quartile]] which used to serve as their
office headquarters before the Quartile Reformation. Their name, the //Antifestivities//,
is misleading; many people mistakenly believe they are against festivities in general.
In reality, though, items such as beer, tortilla chips, and pizza delivery coupons
account for over half of what they take with them on their journeys.
~~ Khan, Alexandra

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# Player: TVB
# Turn: 4
# Title: Uriopoges the Wiseass
Few figures in the history of the Risible Republic can claim to have as much influence as **Urion Opogester**, the founder of Remigrationism. He is better known by his cultic name, **Uriopoges the Wiseass**, which he took after his violent expulsion from the Circle of Fifths and subsequent ascension as the high priest of [[Teramince|Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter]].
The first note of Opogester in the records of the Clamorous Convosembly is of a secretary with both exceptional eloquence and vehemence. After his election as treasurer, records in the [[//Transactions//|Transactions of the Clamorous Convosembly, Vol. 5]] indicate that he took advantage of this position to push his agenda of //extreme// slapstick and thrill pranks in the Convosembly. While Opogester had high-placed figures like Klaus DuKrampus on his side, the oppositon party headed by Undersecretary [[Ignatius Clivowycz|The Disquietist "Circle of Fifths" Revisited]] succeeded in ousting him on charges of "crimes against clownhood" and banning him from the Convosembly.
These seminal events would lend shape to the often-amorphous doctrines later grouped under the heading of **Remigrationism**. Preaching the ephemerality of the world and the cyclical nature of our journey through it -- the "remigration" -- Opogester, now Uriopoges, united the sectarian First Quartile around the idea that the cycle of life is a carousel, carousels are more fun if they go faster, and therefore we ought to send people around it as fast as possible.
Uriopoges' crowning achievement, the construction of [[**Megameat the Doomgoblet**|Quadrant Cup]] [sic], was beset by resistance from orthodox and unorthodox Disquietists alike, which ultimately culminated in the [[Battle of Quillian Square]], where the Remigrationists were victorious despite heavy losses.
~Signed, the Right Honorable Honorius Rightson, Esq., PrR, WKD

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# Player: TVB
# Turn: 5
# Title: The WYZZYIRD
The **Wavelength Yocto-Zig-Zag Yodel Infiltration/Relocation Division**, or **WYZZYIRD** for short, is alleged to be a clandestine military unit operating out of the enigmatic [[Mystery District]] in the Third Quartile. While the scant evidence of their existence (mostly notes from the private journals of Her Quartness Quartilord [[Lega|Lega the Hamhanded]]) is disputed academically only in hushed tones, the WYZZYIRD remains a popular topic of urban legend.
The central narratives of the WYZZYIRD legends claim that its operatives use yodelling at absurdly high frequencies -- their titular "wavelength yocto-zig-zag yodel" -- in order to quantum tunnel through walls or across great distances in order to infiltrate their target's location, where they use their yodelling to suck their target through a wormhole to the dreaded [[Outlands|The Outlands]]. Some allege that the WYZZYIRD is a division of the [[World Transfer Agency]], but as in all things WYZZYIRD, available facts are scant.
One of the most popular variations on the WYZZYIRD urban legend is the claim that [[Joculus the Red]] is one of their operatives. This tall tale is likely inspired by Joculus' boasts about his ability to hide a burrito in any fridge, even fridges unreachable to mortal men, combined with his unsettling track record of having never lied.
~Signed, the Right Honorable Honorius Rightson, Esq., PrR, WKD

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# Player: NVB
# Turn: 4
# Title: War of Civil Coherence
The **War of Civil Coherence** was a conflict primarily between
[[hexadecisections|Double-Eighth Hexadecisection]] of the [[First Quartile]] and everyone
else. It is unclear exactly why the war began, but many contemporary scholars point to
the escalation of a wide-ranging prank war instigated by the [[Order of the Black Ladder]]
against the emerging Remigrationist movement. Note that the label "War of Civil
Coherence" is one insisted upon primarily by First Quartile scholars; among some
Disquietist schools, it is known as "The Revolution pt. II," a reference to the
Disquietist dogmatic teaching that all sequels are inevitably social and commercial
failures.
The war proceeded according to the following pattern, at various scales. First, anti-
Remigrationist forces would perform a prank or other offense in some area. Second, First
Quartile military forces would move to that area and attempt to stamp out resistance.
Without the benefit of [[World Transfer Agency]] logistical support, the resistance forces
either fought (and died), or relocated to start the cycle anew.
Resistance forces were led by General [[Petrov van der Deathface]], who, during the war,
acquired a reputation as an unparalleled tactical genius. Though unable to directly halt
the First Quartile's advance, military historians have noted that he left them
over-extended to the point where a handful of strategic strikes could have crippled their
military machine. Did the grand strategist have a plan to win the war? Sadly, we may
never know, as van der Deathface was killed by a stray bullet at the
[[Battle of Quillian Square]] while attempting to bait a squad of [[Kindergarten Kops]]
into charging their First Quartile allies. Within weeks of his death, the First Quartile
declared victory.
~ Sir Gareth, scholar-prince of Haven Rock

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# Player: HM
# Turn: 1
# Title: World Transfer Agency
**Overview**
The World Transfer Agency (WTA) is the organization that handles all permanent relocation
of persons and goods across quartiles. Though its methods have been questioned by naysayers,
it is responsible for the continued security and well-being of every citizen in our glorious
[[First Quartile]].
**Controversy**
The WTA has been the center of debate amongst members of all quartiles. Most often cited is
the organization's use of [[chloroveritase]] to screen migrants for weapons and other
dangerous materials. It is without a doubt, however, that the chemical's use is more
efficient than any other proposed method.
~~ Khan, Alexandra

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# Player: AB
# Turn: 3
# Title: Joculus the Red
Joculus the Red was an influential and infamous Disquietist known principally for his fateful [[Nose Ceremony]] massacre.
Even from an early age, Joculus was alarmingly incapable of differentiating jokes from savage transgressions against God and humanity alike.
Subsequent research suggests that this was likely due to accumulated exposure to trace amounts of [[chloroveritase]] as a toddler, which provoked hypersensitivity
of his ulnar nerve. The Antifestivites vilified him, recounting his tasteless "jokes" in support of the [[remigration|Trek and Remigration of the Antifestivites]].
//Among his odious "pranks" gone awry://
**-** Ruining the fifth [[Quadrant Cup]] by substituting sugar for baking soda in the Sloppy Joe's industrial cookbook
**-** Defusing the world's entire supply of exploding cigars
**-** Bankrupting the First Quadrant's premier restaurant franchise by exploiting its "unlimited breadsticks" policy
**-** Leaving an outstanding library fine unpaid
**-** Signing his name as "Jacklus ;)" in the [[Order of the Black Ladder]] guestbook
**-** Mixing tabs and spaces
**-** Wearing, simultaneously, striped socks and plaid pajamas (later punishable by death in the second quartile)
Let us never speak of him again!
~ Konrade Krunch
<script>alert("He even placed errant script tags on unsuspecting web applications!");</script>

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# Player: AB
# Turn: 1
# Title: The Disquietist "Circle of Fifths" Revisited
Although the beginnings of the Disquietist revolution are unclear, many
scholars attribute the movement to would-be Disquietist Convosembly leader
Ignatius Clivowycz' refusal to comply with a demand to "...turn the damned
music down", supposedly issued by his superior officer, Klaus DuKrampus. This
explanation is corroborated by the earliest proceedings of the Convosembly,
which outlines the formation of the governing "Circle of Fifths," responsible
for the authorship of the infamous "Five-Hundred Injunctions."
([[Transactions of the Clamorous Convosembly, Vol. 5]])
While the adumbral Circle is considered inseparable from the movement itself,
Clivowycz' recently-discovered personal correspondence suggests that it may
never have been formed for ideological reasons, but simple personal gain.
Following the Quartile Reformation and its natural extensions, the Tertile
Revival and Quintile Quandary, Clivowycz claims that he proposed the
Circle with the intention of "... [leveraging] popular sentiment... to
place [himself] in control of a world-governing cabal" when writing to his
sole nephew ([[Collected Writings and Letters of Ignatius Clivowycz]]).
Furthermore, this suggests that the puzzling Disquietist fascination with
small primes is not a philosophical obsession, but rather a strategy to
bolster public appeal.
~ Konrade Krunch

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# Player: AB
# Turn: 8
# Title: Circus Moon
In Disquietist folk tales, the "Circus Moon" heralds the arrival of [[Teramince|Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter]] to the physical world. According to other myths, the light reflected from the moon itself is (by means curiously unspecified) sufficient to provide a form for Teramince's body. Accounts of the Circus Moon's appearance vary greatly, but commonly speak of a "stretching" or "warping", as if by a funhouse mirror. According to legend, its appearence is usually accompanied by corvids emitting the occasional "Wilhelm Scream."
Because no photographs exist of the Circus Moon and that no physical explanation has been offered for its appearance, it is clear that the Circus Moon is little more than a Disquietist fiction. Nonetheless, the tales appear to influence a great number of Disquietist traditions: even the [[Order of the Black Ladder]] will quickly assemble for an impromptu barbequeue in the event of a supposed sighting.
~ Ersatz Scrivener

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# Player: AB
# Turn: 2
# Title: Genocide of the Second Quartile
Following the conclusion of the [[Double-Eighth Hexadecisection]], most
quartiles resorted to controversal means of achieving their political goals. Most shocking among them is the **Genocide of the Second Quartile**, provoked by a particularly detestable, pun-laden Disquietist fan fiction.
The genocide began swiftly, with the introduction of reams of paperwork into
the dwellings of anyone sporting a [[Red Nose|Nose Ceremony]]. Crippled
by their life-long instruction in carefree japery, the Disquietists were unable
to cope, and most passed away before the filing deadline.
[[Subsequent experiments with fish|Strontz-Mork Fish Trials]] indicate that fish subjected
to life with 10kg of paperwork in their habitat tend to quickly suffocate or
die of starvation. A similar biological process is thought to be responsible
for the near extinction of the Disquietists from the second quartile.
~ Konrade Krunch

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# Player: AB
# Turn: 5
# Title: Quadrant Cup
//What is the Quadrant Cup? Well, that's an easy one, sport. It's your one and only
Social Responsibility™! At the end of the day, the hardworking men and women
of the First Quartile deserve an affordable dinner they can depend on --
and that's where you come in!//
//Close one eye, and wink into the twinkling eyes of [[Urion Opogester|Uriopoges the Wiseass]]. Now
close 'em both and race headfirst into// **Megameat**//'s gaping maw, champ! You'll make
[[Honorious Rightson|Honorius Rightson]] proud!//
//You've had //your// sip of life, and now it's time for life to sip back. Oh, come on now... you wouldn't want to Megameat to summon the [[Kops|Kindergarten Kops]]...//
~ Konrade Krunch

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# Player: AB
# Turn: 6
# Title: Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter
According to canon, Teramince ascended over the former Clown-God of Slaughter,
Gigamince, by baking him into a casserole of cosmic proportions and eating
him to gain his power. Once a year, recalling her hilarious feast, Teramince's
sanguine hunger waxes, and wanes only with a leviathan sip of the
[[Quadrant Cup]].
On this occasion, Teramince takes physical form from the shadows cast by the
[[Circus Moon]] in order to walk amidst mortals and record flavor notes for
her annual people-tasting. Although unconfirmed by any written report, [[Uriopoges|Uriopoges the Wiseass]] is fabled to have become her high priest after offering her a nibble of his index finger, whereupon she pronounced him "...a man of excellent taste and flavor."
~ Konrade Krunch

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# Player: AB
# Turn: 7
# Title: Westexico
Westexico is a province on the other side of [[First Quartile]] that serves as
[[God]]'s burrito orchard. While it is generally respected that [[God]]'s
burrito recipe is simply //divine//, few other sentient entities have the
sophisticated resources or knowledge necessary to construct a suitable tree to
produce them, like [[God]] intended.
Because of the logistical problems presented by tunnelling to the other side
of the continent, burritos are a very scare resource. This scarcity makes them a
natural choice for currency in the four Quartiles, accepted anywhere in the Quartiles following the
[[Penultimate Compact]]. Their use as currency has a few peculiar consequences -- first,
that price of a burrito is as unchanging as [[God]] himself; and second, that one's want for
money grows proportionally with their hunger.
Some conjecture that [[The WYZZYIRD]], if it exists, is naught but a get-rich-quick scheme
with the eventual goal of exfiltrating [[God]]'s entire Westexican Reserve, ordinarily shared
only with his elect. Similarly, there exist rumors of the [[Hand of Justice]] plotting a
similar heist.
~ Konrade Krunch

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<title>Statistics | Lexicon Alpha</title>
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<p><span style="font-size:1.5em;">Lexicon Alpha</span></p>
<p>
<a href="../contents/">Contents</a> &mdash;
<a href="../rules/">Rules</a> &mdash;
<a href="../formatting/">Formatting</a> &mdash;
<a href="../session/">Session</a> &mdash;
<a href="../statistics/">Statistics</a>
</p>
<p>In the wake of the Quartile Reformation, you are scholars investigating the influence of Remigrationism on the Disquietists.</p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>Statistics</h1>
<div class="moveable">
<p><u>Top 10 pages by page rank:</u><br>
1 &ndash; First Quartile<br>
2 &ndash; Joculus the Red<br>
3 &ndash; Petrov van der Deathface<br>
4 &ndash; Uriopoges the Wiseass<br>
5 &ndash; Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter<br>
6 &ndash; Hand of Justice<br>
7 &ndash; Order of the Black Ladder<br>
8 &ndash; Quadrant Cup<br>
9 &ndash; Honorius Rightson<br>
10 &ndash; Battle of Quillian Square</p>
</div>
<div class="moveable">
<p><u>Most citations made from:</u><br>
9 &ndash; Westexico<br>
7 &ndash; War of Civil Coherence; Honorius Rightson; The Jocular Revolution<br>
6 &ndash; Hand of Justice</p>
</div>
<div class="moveable">
<p><u>Most citations made to:</u><br>
9 &ndash; First Quartile<br>
8 &ndash; Petrov van der Deathface; Uriopoges the Wiseass; Teramince, Clown-God of Slaughter<br>
7 &ndash; World Transfer Agency; Quadrant Cup; Joculus the Red</p>
</div>
<div class="moveable">
<p><u>Longest article:</u><br>
282 &ndash; War of Civil Coherence<br>
265 &ndash; Uriopoges the Wiseass<br>
259 &ndash; Transactions of the Clamorous Convosembly, Vol. 5</p>
</div>
<div class="moveable">
<p><u>Player total page rank:</u><br>
NVB &ndash; 0.254<br>
TVB &ndash; 0.248<br>
HM &ndash; 0.243<br>
AB &ndash; 0.241</p>
</div>
<div class="moveable">
<p><u>Citations made by player</u><br>
NVB &ndash; 38<br>
TVB &ndash; 31<br>
HM &ndash; 27<br>
AB &ndash; 26</p>
</div>
<div class="moveable">
<p><u>Citations made to player</u><br>
AB &ndash; 33<br>
TVB &ndash; 32<br>
HM &ndash; 31<br>
NVB &ndash; 24</p>
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<p><span style="font-size:1.5em;">Lexicon Centralium</span></p>
<p>
<a href="../contents/?byindex">Contents</a> &mdash;
<a href="../rules/">Rules</a> &mdash;
<a href="../formatting/">Formatting</a> &mdash;
<a href="../session/">Session</a> &mdash;
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<p><i>You are the survivors of the Happenstancening, trying to piece together how it was that the Seven Strictures failed the Central Order.</i></p>
</div>
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<h1>Acting Mayor "Shades" Parson</h1>
<p>When you see as much as I do you make enemies of all sorts of powerful entities even and including the almost-all-seeing <a href="Strictures_United.html">Strictures United</a>. But even they are blind and have showed their <a href="FaceSpace3A_New_Notifications.html">hand</a> and not only that but also I've intercepted one of their communiques that they pass in the odd month editions of SUpper Home Cooking Magazines and it would appear they have been foiled in their most recent attempt to <a href="The_Binding_Stricture.html">Stricturize</a> our horribly corrupt mayor* into a mayor in their pocket which means that there are still corrupt politicians who are looking to resist and that may mean that there is hope for us to keep the Central Order from falling as <a href="The_Order_which_is_Definitely_Not_Central.html">so many have</a>. There are not many corrupt politicians left and so it is of vital importance that Mr. Parson stay corrupt and out of the control of Strictures.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>REDACTED </p></span>
<p>*Our mayor, who ascended to power through a series of brilliant political maneuvers leading to three <a href="Strictures_United.html">SU</a> candidates being found guilty of sedition during the political scramble of who would temporarily step in for <a href="The_Latitant_Macrophobic_Limaciform_Stricture.html">The Great LaMaLi</a> as he underwent extreme therapy to remove the effects of <a href="Science-Related_Memetic_Disorder.html">SRMD</a>.</p>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="D.E.A.T.H.S.T.A.R..html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="Zetta_Computing.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="The_Binding_Stricture.html">The Binding Stricture</a> | <a href="FaceSpace3A_New_Notifications.html">FaceSpace: New Notifications</a> | <a href="The_Latitant_Macrophobic_Limaciform_Stricture.html">The Latitant Macrophobic Limaciform Stricture</a> | <a href="The_Order_which_is_Definitely_Not_Central.html">The Order which is Definitely Not Central</a> | <a href="Science-Related_Memetic_Disorder.html">Science-Related Memetic Disorder</a> | <a href="Strictures_United.html">Strictures United</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Grampul_Subsection_3.html">Grampul Subsection 3</a> | <a href="Grand_Executor_Jargan.html">Grand Executor Jargan</a> | <a href="Religion_28disambiguation29.html">Religion (disambiguation)</a> | <a href="Science-Related_Memetic_Disorder.html">Science-Related Memetic Disorder</a></p>
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<title>Affirmator | Lexicon Centralium</title>
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<p><span style="font-size:1.5em;">Lexicon Centralium</span></p>
<p>
<a href="../contents/?byindex">Contents</a> &mdash;
<a href="../rules/">Rules</a> &mdash;
<a href="../formatting/">Formatting</a> &mdash;
<a href="../session/">Session</a> &mdash;
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<p><i>You are the survivors of the Happenstancening, trying to piece together how it was that the Seven Strictures failed the Central Order.</i></p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>Affirmator</h1>
<p>When I came to, the nun from earlier and a wizened librarian were pouring over <i>The Laws of the Strictures, Volume 22</i>. A woman in a Strictures United uniform wearing a name tag that said "Susanna Summers" was looking through the bar's food supplies. Q was repairing the tinfoil covering as gunfire sounded outside. Sounded like SU wasn't happy with our little resistance party. Weren't there angry bears for them to shoot instead?</p>
<p>With a groan, I pulled myself off the floor.</p>
<p>"Ah! The eye that keeps to himself!" said the librarian happily. "We were just fondling your answer."</p>
<p>Sister Avacillata looked pained at that phrase but didn't say anything.</p>
<p>"Towards the end," I said, rubbing the new bump on my head. "There was something about redefining <a href="Existence.html">existence</a> using a power ever greater than the Strictures. I didn't have time to read it, but maybe—"</p>
<p>"Of course! Yes, yes, of course, this is a <a href="Happe.html">Happe</a> circumstance," the librarian said, having already found the page in question. "All we need is an <b>Affirmator</b>."</p>
<p>"There hasn't been an Affirmator for hundreds of years," said Sister Avacillata. "Do you just expect one to stroll into the bar because it's convenient? While we're under fire from our own damn military?"</p>
<p>"They're not our military!" shouted Q, scrambling over to the table. "They're all imposters, figments of our imagination! As soon as any of us realize it, they'll go away!"</p>
<p>"That's ridiculous," said Sister Avacillata, but whatever she said next, I didn't hear because Q was talking over her.</p>
<p>"Ooh, my favorite! Almonds!" said Summers.</p>
<p>Immediately, the gunfire ceased. All of us looked at her simultaneously.</p>
<p>"What?" she said.</p>
<p>"We... really like almonds," I said slowly. Making eye contact with the others, I pointed significantly at a particular point on the page. I continued significantly, "in fact, it really raises our morale when you mention it."</p>
<p>At that moment, another figure crashed through the tinfoil. He absentmindedly blocked Q's reflexive hammer blow and surveyed us. Summers screamed.</p>
<p>"Bear!" yelled Sister Avacillata, charging him.</p>
<p>"Wait, friends!" said the bear. "I mean you no harm. I come bearing a dire warning. The <a href="Wise_Bob2C_the_Sequitor_who_Exploded_Most_Direly.html">Great Weapon</a> has been loosed! It will consume all but the <a href="Unnamed_City.html">Unnamed City</a>, unless—"</p>
<p>Thinking quickly, I interrupted him, saying, "That's just what SU <i>wants</i> you to think! It's actually completely harmless!" I nudged Q with my elbow and he began to talk over the bear.</p>
<p>"They call it the Great Weapon to addle your sheeplike mind, but actually—"</p>
<p>"Listen!" the bear shouted back. "You can hear its rumble even now as it comes to—"</p>
<p>"Nothing's actually happening—"</p>
<p>I waved at Summers and said, "Hey! We need some morale over here!"</p>
<p>"Almonds!" she said cheerfully.</p>
<p>The rumbling, which had been building in the background, stopped. Silence fell on all of us, and then we cheered. Summers, pleased at the effect she was having on us, joined in the cheer.</p>
<p>"Q!" I said. "I heard there wasn't even an invasion going on right now!"</p>
<p>"I knew it!" he said. "It's all a plot to—"</p>
<p>The librarian jumped in. "What a happenstance! So many have waited for this moment, but—"</p>
<p>"Almonds!" said Summers again, and we all cheered again.</p>
<p>We saved the world that night. And the rest—at least, until Summers learns the word "Zemben"—is history.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Murph Reynolds, Private Eye</p></span>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="The_Binding_Stricture.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="Wise_Bob2C_the_Sequitor_who_Exploded_Most_Direly.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="Existence.html">Existence</a> | <a href="Happe.html">Happe</a> | <a href="Unnamed_City.html">Unnamed City</a> | <a href="Wise_Bob2C_the_Sequitor_who_Exploded_Most_Direly.html">Wise Bob, the Sequitor who Exploded Most Direly</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Existence.html">Existence</a> | <a href="Happe.html">Happe</a> | <a href="Wrathrunes.html">Wrathrunes</a></p>
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<title>An Apology - from Strictures United | Lexicon Centralium</title>
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<p><span style="font-size:1.5em;">Lexicon Centralium</span></p>
<p>
<a href="../contents/?byindex">Contents</a> &mdash;
<a href="../rules/">Rules</a> &mdash;
<a href="../formatting/">Formatting</a> &mdash;
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<p><i>You are the survivors of the Happenstancening, trying to piece together how it was that the Seven Strictures failed the Central Order.</i></p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>An Apology - from Strictures United</h1>
<p><i>Oh my gosh, I am soooo sorry everyone! I was supposed to send this memo out like, last week! Anyways, super exciting stuff! And like, theres even totally a new stricture now! Like, that hasn't happened in over like, 43 years!!! So anyways, like, here it is!!!</i></p>
<p>...</p>
<p><i>Susanna Summers</i></p>
<p><i>ssummers@stricturesunited.gov</i></p>
<p><i>Intern at Strictures United</i></p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p></p></span>
<p><b>To: </b><i>The General Remaining Public</i></p>
<p><b>From: </b><i>Strictures United</i></p>
<p><b>CC: </b><i>Executive Branch, General Staff, Front Desk, Susanna Summers</i></p>
<p><b>Date: </b><i>August 1st, 3014</i></p>
<p><b>Subject: </b><i>A Message for the Survivors</i></p>
<p>People of the Outer Orders,</p>
<p>Our top priority - above everything else, including <a href="Strictures_United_Quarterly_Financial_Update.html">profits</a> - is your safety. We at Strictures United can afford to lose money - even a lot of money - what we cannot afford to lose is our reputation, and we know we can count on you to uphold that.</p>
<p>What happened with the Central Order was unfortunate, for them. We here at Strictures United work hard to secure your safety and apologize for any restlessness this happenstancing has caused, is simply misguided. We can assure you it wont happen again, given you follow our <a href="The_Twelve_Strictures_for_Self_Assured_Safety.html">Twelve Step Program for Self Assured Safety</a>. These <b>Twelve Strictures</b> have been developed by a carefully selected team of specialists with one goal: Your Safety.</p>
<p>As for the criticism circulating the <b>First Seven Strictures</b>, we kindly remind you to refer to <b><i>ALL</b></i> Strictures in order to truly reap all benefits allowed to you. It is with this that we would like to add the <b>Thirteenth Stricture</b>.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p></p></span>
<p><b>Stricture 13</b></p>
<p>Strictures United was not to blame, it was the people's fault. All apologies by Strictures United are a generous blessing to the people , and therefore completely unnecessary. The Central Order was also completely unnecessary. The Outer Orders are much better. The people want to be in the Outer Orders. The Outer Orders are safe. We have always been at war with Eastasia.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p></p></span>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="Happe.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="Strictures_United_Quarterly_Financial_Update.html">Strictures United Quarterly Financial Update</a> | <a href="The_Twelve_Strictures_for_Self_Assured_Safety.html">The Twelve Strictures for Self Assured Safety</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="The_Bear_Inquisition.html">The Bear Inquisition</a> | <a href="The_Breaching_Stricture.html">The Breaching Stricture</a> | <a href="The_Calamitous_Stricture.html">The Calamitous Stricture</a> | <a href="Grampul_Subsection_3.html">Grampul Subsection 3</a> | <a href="Greetings_to_the_High_Chamberlain.html">Greetings to the High Chamberlain</a> | <a href="The_Ministry_of_Not_Screwing_Things_Up.html">The Ministry of Not Screwing Things Up</a> | <a href="Necesscitas_CruciC481tC4AB_NovC4AB.html">Necesscitas Cruciātī Novī</a> | <a href="Satan.html">Satan</a> | <a href="Strictures_United.html">Strictures United</a> | <a href="Strictures_United_Quarterly_Financial_Update.html">Strictures United Quarterly Financial Update</a> | <a href="The_Twelve_Strictures_for_Self_Assured_Safety.html">The Twelve Strictures for Self Assured Safety</a> | <a href="White_Lab_Coats.html">White Lab Coats</a> | <a href="Zetta_Computing.html">Zetta Computing</a></p>
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<p><span style="font-size:1.5em;">Lexicon Centralium</span></p>
<p>
<a href="../contents/?byindex">Contents</a> &mdash;
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<p><i>You are the survivors of the Happenstancening, trying to piece together how it was that the Seven Strictures failed the Central Order.</i></p>
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<h1>Cathyr Van Sacrilege</h1>
<p><b>Cathyr Van Sacrilege</b> looms as one of the most enigmatic figures of ancient, near-ancient, and nearly-recent history. It may well be said of her that she is the answer to the question—<i>Who?</i> </p>
<p>Born to John and Jane of the ill-destinied Doe family at some point in the early near-ancient, Polly Anne Anne Doe decided at a remarkably young age that she would avoid at all costs the common family fate of mysterious deaths and occasional posthumous renamings. If existent records of her are indeed true, she had hardly begun to speak when she began to defy death.</p>
<p>According to some variants of some legends, <b>Cathyr Van Sacrilege</b>, then still Polly Anne Anne Doe, first encountered the thought of the idea of the possibility of -stancening while still a toddler. Most records have, however, been destroyed amid the hullabalooic destruction surrounding the <a href="The_King27s_Altitude.html"><i>Altissima</i></a>. Perhaps most significant of the records destroyed was an account by <b>Cathyr Van Sacrilege</b> herself of the time she tricked <a href="Satan.html">"the devil hisself"</a> into selling her the secret of immortality in exchange for his own virginity. Much embarrassed by the whole affair, the devil spent the following years writing mythical erotica, some of which was the very reason for the reforms of the Order that led to <a href="The_King27s_Altitude.html">the destruction of the records</a></p>
<p>From the devile, <b>Cathyr Van Sacrilege</b> learned immortality and it was from <a href="Larry27s_Conquest.html">Larry</a> that she learned the secrets of the virtual. It was through the double play of these that <a href="The_Unwritten_Stricture.html">her sapience became unbounded</a>. Unbounded as it was, she was able to evade <a href="The_Binding_Stricture.html">The Binding Stricture</a> with a sort of <a href="The_Kappanstancing.html">imaginary realism</a>. It may well have been that it was this evasion itself which allowed her to set the Stricture of the the Happenstancening in motion, or rather, to <a href="The_Kappanstancing.html">"set it up"</a>, in such a way that it, not her, appeared guilty. Needless to say, it does seem that at least some see her as the primeval culprit of it all. <i>Who?</i> indeed. And how has not a single soul spoken out about the vehicular similarity between <b>Cathyr Van Sacrilege</b> and Vin <i>Jeep</i> Carnold? Lastly, does she get off <a href="The_Order_which_is_Definitely_Not_Central.html">torturing the devil</a>? This may be terribly important.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>
Carver Goodmann,<br>
Sub-Sub-Librarian of Teach<br>
Senior Prepositionalist<br>
ARC ZII, Mirror Technician<br>
Sub-Ambibeliever</p></span>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="The_Fellowship_of_the_Living_Word.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="Wrathrunes.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="The_Binding_Stricture.html">The Binding Stricture</a> | <a href="The_Kappanstancing.html">The Kappanstancing</a> | <a href="The_King27s_Altitude.html">The King's Altitude</a> | <a href="Larry27s_Conquest.html">Larry's Conquest</a> | <a href="The_Order_which_is_Definitely_Not_Central.html">The Order which is Definitely Not Central</a> | <a href="Satan.html">Satan</a> | <a href="The_Unwritten_Stricture.html">The Unwritten Stricture</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="The_Happenstancening.html">The Happenstancening</a> | <a href="The_Kappanstancing.html">The Kappanstancing</a> | <a href="The_Order_which_is_Definitely_Not_Central.html">The Order which is Definitely Not Central</a> | <a href="The_Unwritten_Stricture.html">The Unwritten Stricture</a> | <a href="Void_and_Stricture3A_Reality_as_the_Dance_of_Presence_and_Absenc.html">Void and Stricture: Reality as the Dance of Presence and Absence</a></p>
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<p>
<a href="../contents/?byindex">Contents</a> &mdash;
<a href="../rules/">Rules</a> &mdash;
<a href="../formatting/">Formatting</a> &mdash;
<a href="../session/">Session</a> &mdash;
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<p><i>You are the survivors of the Happenstancening, trying to piece together how it was that the Seven Strictures failed the Central Order.</i></p>
</div>
<div class="content">
<h1>D.E.A.T.H.S.T.A.R.</h1>
<p>Hey, so I managed to get my hands on some serious shit, an old recorded transcript of an executive-level meeting at the Headquarters. I could only extract some of the text, but it's enough to know something's going on. Don't believe what they tell you. I'm overwriting this article with what I have so anyone who comes searching will find it.</p>
<p>Side note: anyone know who that other guy could be? Please update this if you do. I have a bad feeling about this.</p>
<p>- Lucas (pseudonym)</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p></p></span>
<p>MEETING TRANSCRIPT</p>
<p>Start: 05/25/11 18:35<br>
End: 05/25/11 19:03<br>
Location: DST41.35.202<br>
Participants: <a href="Grand_Executor_Jargan.html">Grand Executor Jargan</a>, Second participant unknown</p>
<p><b>Jargan</b>: And what of the strictures?</p>
<p><b>Unknown</b>: What of them? Their prominence will not waiver.</p>
<p><b>Jargan</b>: They'll be exposed. Failures, in the people's eyes.</p>
<p><b>Unknown</b>: It's a trap. A guise. One that <a href="Zetta_Computing.html">Zetta</a> and the others WILL fall for.</p>
<p><b>Jargan</b>: You can't seriously believe it will work. You know the strictures are written by--</p>
<p><b>Unknown</b>: The strictures. Are not written. They are discovered. For they are ingrained in the fabric of reality, living things that--</p>
<p><b>Jargan</b>: Enough with this nonsense! We will continue this operation as WE have planned. Your sad devotion to that <a href="The_Fellowship_of_the_Living_Word.html">ancient religion</a> has no merit in this discussion.</p>
<p><b>Unknown</b>: I find your lack of faith disturbing. Do you question the power of the eight strictures?</p>
<p><b>Jargan</b>: Of course not, I... but... eight, sir?</p>
<p>THE REMAINDER OF THIS TRANSCRIPT HAS BEEN ENCRYPTED OR DELETED</p>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="Earthson27s_Bar_and_Grill.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="Acting_Mayor_22Shades22_Parson.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="The_Fellowship_of_the_Living_Word.html">The Fellowship of the Living Word</a> | <a href="Grand_Executor_Jargan.html">Grand Executor Jargan</a> | <a href="Zetta_Computing.html">Zetta Computing</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Existence.html">Existence</a> | <a href="FaceSpace3A_New_Notifications.html">FaceSpace: New Notifications</a> | <a href="The_Fellowship_of_the_Living_Word.html">The Fellowship of the Living Word</a> | <a href="Grampul_Subsection_3.html">Grampul Subsection 3</a> | <a href="On_The_Eternality_of_Strictures.html">On The Eternality of Strictures</a></p>
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<p><span style="font-size:1.5em;">Lexicon Centralium</span></p>
<p>
<a href="../contents/?byindex">Contents</a> &mdash;
<a href="../rules/">Rules</a> &mdash;
<a href="../formatting/">Formatting</a> &mdash;
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<p><i>You are the survivors of the Happenstancening, trying to piece together how it was that the Seven Strictures failed the Central Order.</i></p>
</div>
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<h1>DEAR OLD LOKI, “CHILD” OF URMOTHER</h1>
<p>Few things are known about Dear Old Loki.</p>
<p>The Best Dancer of all.</p>
<p>The Great Weapon.</p>
<p>The Terminal Void.</p>
<p>Alleged Author of the Original Strictures.</p>
<p>The Greatest Light in the World.</p>
<p>Occasional Scratcher of the Latitant Macrophobic Limaciform Strictures lonely chin.</p>
<p>Emblem icon of <a href="Earthson27s_Bar_and_Grill.html">Earthson's Bar and Grill</a>.</p>
<p>Inventor of Schwishball.</p>
<p>Allegedly seen in <a href="Grampul_Subsection_3.html">Grampul Subsection 3</a>.</p>
<p>Epitome of Mystery.</p>
<p>Antlers of Gold.</p>
<p>Complexity beyond Complexity.</p>
<p>Son of <a href="Religion_28disambiguation29.html">the Greatest Believer</a>.</p>
<p>So what does it all mean? A great being, a great mystery, a great power. It leaves many wondering, leaves many searching, and many disappearing. With so many of the files still missing, its a wonder of the worlds that may simply never be understood. I wish I could say more, but I just don't know. We may never know.</p>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="Great_Bear27s_Veins.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
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<p>Citations: <a href="Earthson27s_Bar_and_Grill.html">Earthson's Bar and Grill</a> | <a href="Grampul_Subsection_3.html">Grampul Subsection 3</a> | <a href="Religion_28disambiguation29.html">Religion (disambiguation)</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Flamenco_Dance-Off.html">Flamenco Dance-Off</a> | <a href="The_Latitant_Macrophobic_Limaciform_Stricture.html">The Latitant Macrophobic Limaciform Stricture</a> | <a href="The_Laws_of_the_Strictures.html">The Laws of the Strictures</a> | <a href="Ontological_Abstractions_and_How_to_Beat_Them_to_Death.html">Ontological Abstractions and How to Beat Them to Death</a> | <a href="Strictures_United.html">Strictures United</a></p>
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<a href="../contents/?byindex">Contents</a> &mdash;
<a href="../rules/">Rules</a> &mdash;
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<p><i>You are the survivors of the Happenstancening, trying to piece together how it was that the Seven Strictures failed the Central Order.</i></p>
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<h1>Earthson's Bar and Grill</h1>
<p>It is not the finest dining establishment in the Orders, for that would imply a level of formality appropriate to "fine dining". It is not the cheapest, nor provides the largest portions, nor has it the most amenities, or the largest menu, or the most advanced facilities. Yet in the wake of the Happenstancening, when it seemed that time and space themselves were set against us, <b>Earthson's Bar and Grill</b> appeared in the <a href="Grampul_Subsection_3.html">Central Order</a> as if out of nowhere and became the best. In our time of need, this bar and its genial owner offered us a kind word, a knowing smile, and a heady beer. Somehow, when he tells us tales of his late wife, of worlds turned inside out, of horrors from beyond, everything seems like it will turn out alright. Or, at least, that's the only thing people remember about it &mdash; he only regales people who are too drunk to remember the details.</p>
<p>Earthson's is something of a refuge for the lost and dispossessed in Grampul. <a href="Vin2C_Vice_President_Carnold.html">VP Vin</a> (or should I say <i>Jeep</i> Vin? Ha!) hates the place with a passion, since with the lost and dispossessed comes no small amount of simmering unrest, bright-eyed revolutionaries, and down-and-out sons of the Orders with nothing to lose. Some evenings it seems there's a plot brewing in every booth. Word on the street is that Vin pressured ol' Strics U into <a href="The_Twelve_Strictures_for_Self_Assured_Safety.html">emptying the subsection</a> just to clear the place out. He can't move against it directly, of course. Not only is it all but holy ground for the common man here, the entrance to the place seems to change locations throughout the back streets of the Central Order. Rumors are the owner invented magic. It's not like we believe in magic in our enlightened and scientific age, but with everything else that's happened, why take the risk?</p>
<p>Still, some things about Earthson's seem to defy belief. Last night I had just finished debating an unhappy <a href="Happe.html">Happe</a> on a finer point of textual interpretation when I saw the owner sneak out into the back hallway. Knowing that there are no bathrooms back there, I released my interlocutor from the headlock and followed. The hallway curved with strange geometries, and I saw the owner pass by a series of doors, each marked with the name of an Order. He entered the door marked <a href="The_Order_which_is_Definitely_Not_Central.html">"ORD. DEF. NOT C."</a>. I snuck forward and peeked through, and the sight I beheld shook me to my core.</p>
<p>We all knew OWIDNC had taken the Happenstancening hard. We all knew that it might not even exist any more. But nothing could have prepared me to see Hell itself beyond that doorway, and all the hosts of the damned arrayed against the man who had just arrived. <a href="Satan.html">The Prince of Darkness himself</a> bellowed his challenge and raised a sword of purest darkness. I was about to run to my sisters back at the bar for aid when that man, standing tall in that pit where the fire is not quenched, looked back at me and winked. I fled, clutching my pectoral cross.</p>
<p>There wasn't enough Stout of Unknowing in the place for me to get any sleep that night.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>Sister Avacillata, Nun-Scholar of the Scriptorium</p></span>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="Greetings_to_the_High_Chamberlain.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="D.E.A.T.H.S.T.A.R..html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="Grampul_Subsection_3.html">Grampul Subsection 3</a> | <a href="Happe.html">Happe</a> | <a href="The_Order_which_is_Definitely_Not_Central.html">The Order which is Definitely Not Central</a> | <a href="Satan.html">Satan</a> | <a href="The_Twelve_Strictures_for_Self_Assured_Safety.html">The Twelve Strictures for Self Assured Safety</a> | <a href="Vin2C_Vice_President_Carnold.html">Vin, Vice President Carnold</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="The_Bear_Inquisition.html">The Bear Inquisition</a> | <a href="The_Binding_Stricture.html">The Binding Stricture</a> | <a href="DEAR_OLD_LOKI2C_E2809CCHILDE2809D_OF_URMOTHER.html">DEAR OLD LOKI, “CHILD” OF URMOTHER</a> | <a href="Existence.html">Existence</a> | <a href="FaceSpace3A_New_Notifications.html">FaceSpace: New Notifications</a> | <a href="Flamenco_Dance-Off.html">Flamenco Dance-Off</a> | <a href="Grampul_Subsection_3.html">Grampul Subsection 3</a> | <a href="The_Kappanstancing.html">The Kappanstancing</a> | <a href="The_Laws_of_the_Strictures.html">The Laws of the Strictures</a> | <a href="Missing_Files.html">Missing Files</a> | <a href="On_The_Eternality_of_Strictures.html">On The Eternality of Strictures</a> | <a href="Satan.html">Satan</a> | <a href="Science-Related_Memetic_Disorder.html">Science-Related Memetic Disorder</a> | <a href="Seirapolis.html">Seirapolis</a> | <a href="Unnamed_City.html">Unnamed City</a> | <a href="The_Unwritten_Stricture.html">The Unwritten Stricture</a> | <a href="Void_and_Stricture3A_Reality_as_the_Dance_of_Presence_and_Absenc.html">Void and Stricture: Reality as the Dance of Presence and Absence</a></p>
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<a href="../rules/">Rules</a> &mdash;
<a href="../formatting/">Formatting</a> &mdash;
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<p><i>You are the survivors of the Happenstancening, trying to piece together how it was that the Seven Strictures failed the Central Order.</i></p>
</div>
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<h1>Existence</h1>
<p>Aha! I knew that the SUper market was yet another front for the underground to release its communiques. The flickering lights above the pale white floors are intentionally flickering of course, and if you look carefully you'll realize that it can be translated via Morse code! Of course doing so results in nothing but the gibberish of a madman but if you instead translate the flickers into binary and run the numbers through a Fourier transform and then divide the result by zero you receive the location of the exact answer to that ultimate question of "WHY???" Clearly <b>Existence</b>* is a member of the underground and has a report of that one question the Strictures hide so well that question whose answer I have received indicates that the only answer is found of course as the bottom of a lager which itself is found at <a href="Earthson27s_Bar_and_Grill.html">the fount of answers</a> of the man Earthson^ which is of course one of the last vestiges of goodness and resistance. But to fully unlock the question we require of course both a <a href="Happe.html">Happe</a> and an <a href="Affirmator.html">Affirmator</a> after all without the two of these specimen we cannot know the answer even if we hear it. And OF COURSE these have been locked away in the <a href="D.E.A.T.H.S.T.A.R..html">underground vaults</a> of <a href="Strictures_United.html">Strictures United</a> for their own nefarious purposes. The people must rise up!!</p>
<p>*The -3rd Hidden Stricture.</p>
<p>^For whatever else he may be, philosopher, master of brewmasters, walker of non-euclidean ontologies, <a href="Religion_28disambiguation29.html">semi-deity, full-deity</a>, he is a man.</p>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="Grand_Executor_Jargan.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="The_Bear_Inquisition.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="Affirmator.html">Affirmator</a> | <a href="D.E.A.T.H.S.T.A.R..html">D.E.A.T.H.S.T.A.R.</a> | <a href="Earthson27s_Bar_and_Grill.html">Earthson's Bar and Grill</a> | <a href="Happe.html">Happe</a> | <a href="Religion_28disambiguation29.html">Religion (disambiguation)</a> | <a href="Strictures_United.html">Strictures United</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Affirmator.html">Affirmator</a> | <a href="Flamenco_Dance-Off.html">Flamenco Dance-Off</a> | <a href="Grampul_Subsection_3.html">Grampul Subsection 3</a> | <a href="The_Ministry_of_Not_Screwing_Things_Up.html">The Ministry of Not Screwing Things Up</a> | <a href="Reticular_transcendence.html">Reticular transcendence</a> | <a href="Strictures_United_Quarterly_Financial_Update.html">Strictures United Quarterly Financial Update</a></p>
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<a href="../rules/">Rules</a> &mdash;
<a href="../formatting/">Formatting</a> &mdash;
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<p><i>You are the survivors of the Happenstancening, trying to piece together how it was that the Seven Strictures failed the Central Order.</i></p>
</div>
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<h1>FaceSpace: New Notifications</h1>
<p><b>Welcome to the FaceSpace Homepage!</b></p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p></p></span>
<p>..............................................................<b>New Posts</b>..............................................................</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p></p></span>
<p><b>Susanna Summers <i>is feeling overwhelmed. </b>August 9th, 3014</i></p>
<p>AHHH! I'm Like SO TOTALLY behind at work right now I feel like I am totally drowning in my desk! Seriously! OMG, I spend hours organizing these silly <i>blue and brown books</i> everyone here keeps ordering everyday! And the constant spam messages?! </p>
<p>Ugh! like LOOK at thisq:</p>
<p>[23/9/20/20/7/5/14/19/20/5/9/14] [2/25] [8/1/14/19] [19/12/21/7/1]
- [P2W48L6] [P2W12] [P9W120] [P1W25] [P1W32L8/P1W32L9] -<br>
[P24W2L2/P24W2L1/P24W13L5/P24W4L2] [P24W1] [P4W13L3/P4W13L4/P4W13L5]</p>
<p>How am I like EVER going to focus enough to get this place ready for our upcoming <a href="Vin2C_Vice_President_Carnold.html">guest visitor</a>?! I like totally heared there's a promotion in the air for him!</p>
<p>
<b>#SendHelpLOL #MumboJumbo #WhoTheHeckIsWittgenstein #CongratulationsCarnoldVin #Promotions #StricturesUnited #A1B2C3 #ABC123</b></p>
<p><i>8 People Liked This</i></p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p></p></span>
<p><b>Susanna Summers <i>is feeling blessed. </b>July 30th, 3014</i></p>
<p>OMG, like, I totally applied for an internship in the Central Order like only a month ago!! Feeling <b>#BLESSED</b> that I work for <b>Strictures United</b> on this beautiful <a href="D.E.A.T.H.S.T.A.R..html">Designated Embassy And Terrestrial Headquarters for Strictures Teams And Resources</a>! </p>
<p><b>#Happenstancing #StandingWithStricturesUnited #blessed #DEATHSTARProud</b></p>
<p><i>46 People Liked This</i></p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p></p></span>
<p><b>Susanna Summers <i>is at</i> <a href="Earthson27s_Bar_and_Grill.html">Earthson's Bar and Grill</a> <i>with </i>Kyra Summers, Lacey VanDezel, <i>and </i>Rachel Smith </b> <i>July 16th, 3014</i></p>
<p><i>37 People Liked This</i></p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p></p></span>
<p><b>Susanna Summers <i>is with </i>Kyra Summers <i>and 2 others.</i></b> <i>July 13th, 3014</i></p>
<p>Eeeek! Can't wait for Girls Night with my ladies! Like, totally time to celebrate!</p>
<p><i>23 People Liked This</i></p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p></p></span>
<p>.............<b>Susanna Summers</b> started working as an intern at <b>Strictures United</b>.................<br>
.....................................................<i>July 12th, 3014</i>................................................................</p>
<p><i>113 People Liked This</i></p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p></p></span>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="The_Latitant_Macrophobic_Limaciform_Stricture.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
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<p>Citations: <a href="D.E.A.T.H.S.T.A.R..html">D.E.A.T.H.S.T.A.R.</a> | <a href="Earthson27s_Bar_and_Grill.html">Earthson's Bar and Grill</a> | <a href="Vin2C_Vice_President_Carnold.html">Vin, Vice President Carnold</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Acting_Mayor_22Shades22_Parson.html">Acting Mayor "Shades" Parson</a> | <a href="The_Binding_Stricture.html">The Binding Stricture</a> | <a href="The_Breaching_Stricture.html">The Breaching Stricture</a> | <a href="Grampul_Subsection_3.html">Grampul Subsection 3</a> | <a href="The_Ministry_of_Not_Screwing_Things_Up.html">The Ministry of Not Screwing Things Up</a> | <a href="Ontological_Abstractions_and_How_to_Beat_Them_to_Death.html">Ontological Abstractions and How to Beat Them to Death</a> | <a href="The_Unwritten_Stricture.html">The Unwritten Stricture</a></p>
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<p><i>You are the survivors of the Happenstancening, trying to piece together how it was that the Seven Strictures failed the Central Order.</i></p>
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<h1>Flamenco Dance-Off</h1>
<p>After a long sequence of concrete-shattering blows, the Sister and the Ursinquisitor tottered off to the <a href="Earthson27s_Bar_and_Grill.html">local bar</a> with their arms around each other's shoulders. Me, I didn't have a handy shoulder nearby, so I had to drag myself up the hard way.</p>
<p>I won't bore you with the details on <a href="Logomancy.html">logomancy</a>, mostly because every time I figured it out, it slipped out of my head like how this metaphor is getting away from me right now. The one thing I retained was that most logomantic work is done through <b>Flamenco dancing</b>. One of the problems in early logomancy was that people's internal monologue kept getting caught up in the
rituals and screwing everything up. Back then logomancers used to use meditation and contemplation to clear their minds, but nowadays the old methods are considered too inefficient. Instead, they set up a translator that generates logomantic output from muscle movements. Sounds great in theory, but it turns out they could only get it to work by dancing at it, and flamenco is the only dance style that works reliably.</p>
<p><a href="Strictures_United.html">SU</a> is in a tight spot right now because their best dancer, <a href="Harvey_Gardell.html">Harvey Gardell</a>, has arthritis and can't keep pulling the same workload he used to. But why would they be pulling in mad scientists to support him? Mad scientists dance like a drunken six-year-old on an exercise ball, and don't ask me how I know what that looks like. The notion's absurd.</p>
<p>I didn't even want to consider the alternative, but it was grinning at me out of the corner of my eye like a thirteen-car pileup that started with a school bus and a van full of clowns. It was too horrible not to stare.</p>
<p>Mad scientists are terrible dancers, yes, but they excel at messing with <a href="The_Happenstancening.html">forces</a> <a href="Existence.html">beyond</a> <a href="Necesscitas_CruciC481tC4AB_NovC4AB.html">their</a> <a href="Religion_28disambiguation29.html">control</a>. That could only mean one thing:</p>
<p>Strictures United was trying to summon the <a href="DEAR_OLD_LOKI2C_E2809CCHILDE2809D_OF_URMOTHER.html">best dancer of all</a>.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>Murph Reynolds, Private Eye</p></span>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="The_Happenstancening.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="The_Unwritten_Stricture.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="DEAR_OLD_LOKI2C_E2809CCHILDE2809D_OF_URMOTHER.html">DEAR OLD LOKI, “CHILD” OF URMOTHER</a> | <a href="Earthson27s_Bar_and_Grill.html">Earthson's Bar and Grill</a> | <a href="Existence.html">Existence</a> | <a href="The_Happenstancening.html">The Happenstancening</a> | <a href="Harvey_Gardell.html">Harvey Gardell</a> | <a href="Logomancy.html">Logomancy</a> | <a href="Necesscitas_CruciC481tC4AB_NovC4AB.html">Necesscitas Cruciātī Novī</a> | <a href="Religion_28disambiguation29.html">Religion (disambiguation)</a> | <a href="Strictures_United.html">Strictures United</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Harvey_Gardell.html">Harvey Gardell</a> | <a href="Logomancy.html">Logomancy</a> | <a href="Strictures_United_Quarterly_Financial_Update.html">Strictures United Quarterly Financial Update</a></p>
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<p><i>You are the survivors of the Happenstancening, trying to piece together how it was that the Seven Strictures failed the Central Order.</i></p>
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<h1>Grampul Subsection 3</h1>
<p>Grampul Sebsection 3, AKA the Central Order, AKA the rusting pile of impromptu gravestones and dead doomsday devices that I had the misfortune to call home. After two years they've cleared out the corpses—almost—but the stench still lingers like a house party guest who won't take a hint. It rains every day but somehow the gutters are still full of trash. And aside from the occasional unlucky tourist, there isn't a man, woman, or child here who hasn't seen nine out of ten of their loved ones perish to <a href="Typhus_Stormbreaker.html">fire</a>, lighting, flying robot sharks, <a href="Larry27s_Conquest.html">virtual soldiers</a>, sudden loss of <a href="Existence.html">existence</a>, reverse lightning, <a href="The_King27s_Altitude.html">dediscombobulation</a>, <a href="Missing_Files.html">rocket-propelled encyclopedia volumes</a>, mysterious lightning-like energies which were not actually lightning, <a href="Ontological_Abstractions_and_How_to_Beat_Them_to_Death.html">incarnated metaphysical principles</a>, <a href="The_Unwritten_Stricture.html">disruption of physical coherence</a>, <a href="The_Piercing_Stricture.html">stab wounds</a>, <a href="Happe.html">interruption of causality</a>, and/or <a href="Water-Free_Water.html">liquid lightning</a>—while simultaneously inflicting one or more of these perils on society themselves. The trauma sticks to you like napalm.</p>
<p>We had enough problems of our own. We had a <a href="Acting_Mayor_22Shades22_Parson.html">corrupt mayor</a> who was eyeing <a href="Strictures_United.html">Strictures United</a>'s <a href="Seirapolis.html">broken stricture containment facility</a> in case it caused more problems he couldn't just bribe away. We had a vice president who was <a href="FaceSpace3A_New_Notifications.html">in deep</a> with SU's local <a href="D.E.A.T.H.S.T.A.R..html">fortress laboratory</a> while they <a href="Harvey_Gardell.html">gathered more talent</a> so they could <a href="An_Apology_-_from_Strictures_United.html">enslave us all with a new stricture</a>. We had a shared border with <a href="The_Order_which_is_Definitely_Not_Central.html">Hell itself</a> that it later turned out was only maintained by the efforts of a <a href="Earthson27s_Bar_and_Grill.html">lone bartender</a>. <i>No one seemed to remember that we should have had a president.</i></p>
<p>Whatever the historians say, we had enough to worry about, so it's not surprising we didn't see <a href="Necesscitas_CruciC481tC4AB_NovC4AB.html">what</a> <a href="The_Piercing_Stricture.html">was</a> <a href="Grand_Executor_Jargan.html">coming</a> <a href="The_Calamitous_Stricture.html">for us</a>. And I certainly didn't intend to end up in the middle of it when everything went "totally nuts-o", as our current president <a href="Journal_Entry.html">wrote</a> at the time. I'd only been doing my job: I'd overheard that Ursinquisitor <a href="Greetings_to_the_High_Chamberlain.html">asking</a> <a href="Letter_on_the_Great_Corruption.html">the good Sister</a> about the <a href="The_Latitant_Macrophobic_Limaciform_Stricture.html">Great LaMiLi</a>, realized there was a lead there, and, <a href="Religion_28disambiguation29.html">God help me</a>, <a href="Strictures_United_Quarterly_Financial_Update.html">followed the money</a>.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>Murph Reynolds, Private Eye</p></span>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="The_Kappanstancing.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="The_Breaching_Stricture.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="Acting_Mayor_22Shades22_Parson.html">Acting Mayor "Shades" Parson</a> | <a href="An_Apology_-_from_Strictures_United.html">An Apology - from Strictures United</a> | <a href="The_Calamitous_Stricture.html">The Calamitous Stricture</a> | <a href="D.E.A.T.H.S.T.A.R..html">D.E.A.T.H.S.T.A.R.</a> | <a href="Earthson27s_Bar_and_Grill.html">Earthson's Bar and Grill</a> | <a href="Existence.html">Existence</a> | <a href="FaceSpace3A_New_Notifications.html">FaceSpace: New Notifications</a> | <a href="Grand_Executor_Jargan.html">Grand Executor Jargan</a> | <a href="Greetings_to_the_High_Chamberlain.html">Greetings to the High Chamberlain</a> | <a href="Happe.html">Happe</a> | <a href="Harvey_Gardell.html">Harvey Gardell</a> | <a href="Journal_Entry.html">Journal Entry</a> | <a href="The_King27s_Altitude.html">The King's Altitude</a> | <a href="Larry27s_Conquest.html">Larry's Conquest</a> | <a href="The_Latitant_Macrophobic_Limaciform_Stricture.html">The Latitant Macrophobic Limaciform Stricture</a> | <a href="Letter_on_the_Great_Corruption.html">Letter on the Great Corruption</a> | <a href="Missing_Files.html">Missing Files</a> | <a href="Necesscitas_CruciC481tC4AB_NovC4AB.html">Necesscitas Cruciātī Novī</a> | <a href="Ontological_Abstractions_and_How_to_Beat_Them_to_Death.html">Ontological Abstractions and How to Beat Them to Death</a> | <a href="The_Order_which_is_Definitely_Not_Central.html">The Order which is Definitely Not Central</a> | <a href="The_Piercing_Stricture.html">The Piercing Stricture</a> | <a href="Religion_28disambiguation29.html">Religion (disambiguation)</a> | <a href="Seirapolis.html">Seirapolis</a> | <a href="Strictures_United.html">Strictures United</a> | <a href="Strictures_United_Quarterly_Financial_Update.html">Strictures United Quarterly Financial Update</a> | <a href="Typhus_Stormbreaker.html">Typhus Stormbreaker</a> | <a href="The_Unwritten_Stricture.html">The Unwritten Stricture</a> | <a href="Water-Free_Water.html">Water-Free Water</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="DEAR_OLD_LOKI2C_E2809CCHILDE2809D_OF_URMOTHER.html">DEAR OLD LOKI, “CHILD” OF URMOTHER</a> | <a href="Earthson27s_Bar_and_Grill.html">Earthson's Bar and Grill</a> | <a href="The_Fellowship_of_the_Living_Word.html">The Fellowship of the Living Word</a> | <a href="Ontological_Abstractions_and_How_to_Beat_Them_to_Death.html">Ontological Abstractions and How to Beat Them to Death</a> | <a href="Reticular_transcendence.html">Reticular transcendence</a> | <a href="Vin2C_Vice_President_Carnold.html">Vin, Vice President Carnold</a></p>
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<p><span style="font-size:1.5em;">Lexicon Centralium</span></p>
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<a href="../rules/">Rules</a> &mdash;
<a href="../formatting/">Formatting</a> &mdash;
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<p><i>You are the survivors of the Happenstancening, trying to piece together how it was that the Seven Strictures failed the Central Order.</i></p>
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<h1>Grand Executor Jargan</h1>
<p>As the foremost nun-scholar of the Scriptorium, it is my responsibility to maintain order on campus. The work of the Scriptorium requires an atmosphere of silent focus in which our scholars may go about their duties of translating, analyzing, and illuminating texts. Threats to this order must be neutralized with extreme prejudice. I therefore spit in disgust as I speak the cursed name of <b>Shiggles Jargan</b>, the <a href="Happe.html">Happe's</a> Grand Executor of Surprise Parties.</p>
<p>Jargan's wretched legacy began in the before-times, which would normally make it nearly inaccessible to prospective imitators. Sadly, however, it remains enshrined in a <a href="Larry27s_Conquest.html">reticular echo by the Mitral Iris</a>, wherein Jargan is visible giving the infamous "Atomic Wedgie" to Big Todd that catalyzed the latter's psychotic break, indirectly leading to the deaths of thousands. Neither has he slowed down since. In fact, the breakdown in causality has only made it easier to launch surprise parties. Just last week, Jargan's elite CelebraCorps snuck <i>out</i> of the Scriptorium's astronomy tower, then reversed the arrow of time and had a party in reverse, incidentally ripping several of our astronomers out of the space-time continuum in the process. My sisters have expressed a desire to get this sort of thing outlawed, so that we have some legal recourse next time, but I would prefer to keep the law out of it. My own way of dealing with these things works better that way, and you just know the <a href="Acting_Mayor_22Shades22_Parson.html">Mayor's</a> office is too corrupt to do anything about an incident that doesn't threaten their power base.</p>
<p>To my great shame, Jargan's manifesto of unexpected celebration, <a href="On_The_Eternality_of_Strictures.html"><i>On The Eternality of Strictures</i></a>, has been preserved within the Scriptorium archives. By giving his compilation of musings, tactics, and techniques such a boring title and opening with a series of long-winded quotes from <a href="Greetings_to_the_High_Chamberlain.html">Father Marquette</a>, he seems to have evaded the Scriptorium censors, who subsequently gave the book an <i>imprimatur</i> and approved it for the Sacred Archive, despite there being nothing about Strictures beyond the first page. Because books may never be removed from the Archive, but only added, Jargan's vapid expectorations are now permanently enshrined in Scriptorium lore and guaranteed perseverance by our dedicated copyists! The censor responsible for this is going to <i>wish</i> they were in <a href="The_Order_which_is_Definitely_Not_Central.html">hell</a> if I find them.</p>
<p>The title of <i>Grand Executor of Surprise Parties</i> is, of course, only one of several Happe ceremonial positions, ranking just above the <i>Grand Executor of Bagpipe Appreciation</i> and just below the <i>Grand Executor of Resistance to Bourgeois Fashion</i>. The Grand Executors are each responsible for executing the traditional Happe plans for their particular domain. Only Jargan seems to have picked up the double meaning of the title and run with it, aside from that one incident where the Grand Executor of Stand-Up Comedy replaced all of the water in the Spurious Order with <a href="Water-Free_Water.html">an impotable liquid</a>.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>Sister Avacillata, Nun-Scholar of the Scriptorium</p></span>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="Journal_Entry.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="Existence.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="Acting_Mayor_22Shades22_Parson.html">Acting Mayor "Shades" Parson</a> | <a href="Greetings_to_the_High_Chamberlain.html">Greetings to the High Chamberlain</a> | <a href="Happe.html">Happe</a> | <a href="Larry27s_Conquest.html">Larry's Conquest</a> | <a href="On_The_Eternality_of_Strictures.html">On The Eternality of Strictures</a> | <a href="The_Order_which_is_Definitely_Not_Central.html">The Order which is Definitely Not Central</a> | <a href="Water-Free_Water.html">Water-Free Water</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="D.E.A.T.H.S.T.A.R..html">D.E.A.T.H.S.T.A.R.</a> | <a href="The_Fellowship_of_the_Living_Word.html">The Fellowship of the Living Word</a> | <a href="Grampul_Subsection_3.html">Grampul Subsection 3</a> | <a href="On_The_Eternality_of_Strictures.html">On The Eternality of Strictures</a></p>
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<p><i>You are the survivors of the Happenstancening, trying to piece together how it was that the Seven Strictures failed the Central Order.</i></p>
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<h1>Great Bear's Veins</h1>
<p>There's an old legend whispered among the Ursinquisitors, of some mythological sonnuvabitch they call the Great Bear. There's some tall tales about its great deeds, stoic character, noble sacrifice, et cetera. It's all very dry to anybody who isn't in the Inquisition itself. I copied a few of them in my day, but I must confess I didn't pay any attention to the contents. <a href="Letter_on_the_Great_Corruption.html">Leylines of power?</a> Meh. The only thing it seems to give the bears is something to cry out to when I've got them in a chokehold. Look, I ain't no saint. When I was assigned by the Abbess as the cultural liaison to the Ursinquisitus, I skipped all the assigned reading. The bears didn't take it very well, but my fists were liaison enough for that. So, I don't have a lot to say about the Great Bear or his veins.</p>
<p>It's probably all a moot point by now: the Orders are all but kaput, their already tenuous stability utterly broken by the <a href="Necesscitas_CruciC481tC4AB_NovC4AB.html">Fifth Crusade</a>. The Strictures aren't going to do anybody any more good in the state they're in now, <a href="Journal_Entry.html">not that there are many people even <i>left</i></a> to do good to. I didn't check, but I assume the Scriptorium exploded, or imploded, or something of the sort. If the <b>Great Bear's Veins</b> had any significance, there's nothing left for them to signify. They're of the past, now.</p>
<p>I am, if nothing else, an educator, and I'll be damned if I won't turn this into a hard-earned lesson for <i>someone</i>. But hey, around these parts, causality is fickle. I don't much care who gets taught or what connection the lesson has to recent events. So, I'm going to <a href="The_Order_which_is_Definitely_Not_Central.html">hell</a>, and I'm going to teach <a href="Satan.html">Satan</a> a lesson about what happens when you piss off an Aquiline &mdash; or are involved in something that pisses off an Aquline, or are near a pissed-off Aquiline, etc.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>Sister Avacillata, ex-Nun-Scholar of the Scriptorium</p></span>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="Logomancy.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="DEAR_OLD_LOKI2C_E2809CCHILDE2809D_OF_URMOTHER.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="Journal_Entry.html">Journal Entry</a> | <a href="Letter_on_the_Great_Corruption.html">Letter on the Great Corruption</a> | <a href="Necesscitas_CruciC481tC4AB_NovC4AB.html">Necesscitas Cruciātī Novī</a> | <a href="The_Order_which_is_Definitely_Not_Central.html">The Order which is Definitely Not Central</a> | <a href="Satan.html">Satan</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Letter_on_the_Great_Corruption.html">Letter on the Great Corruption</a> | <a href="Void_and_Stricture3A_Reality_as_the_Dance_of_Presence_and_Absenc.html">Void and Stricture: Reality as the Dance of Presence and Absence</a> | <a href="Wise_Bob2C_the_Sequitor_who_Exploded_Most_Direly.html">Wise Bob, the Sequitor who Exploded Most Direly</a></p>
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<p><i>You are the survivors of the Happenstancening, trying to piece together how it was that the Seven Strictures failed the Central Order.</i></p>
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<h1>Greetings to the High Chamberlain</h1>
<p>Communique 43:// #subsector 5, High Office Chamberlain</p>
<p>AethID 07718-33:/ CalypsoNet</p>
<p>"The Old Strictures are come again, and with faces altered like the rising of a different sun." -From the Prophecy of Brother Thanatos, Elder Clawbearer</p>
<p>From: Ursinquisitor Thelemas Tier</p>
<p>Greetings Blessed Chamberlain of All Fury,</p>
<p>I write this missive to explain my absence from the Great Den for this past many months and to inform Your Excellency of a discovery which, if it is borne out in all truth and zeal, does promise to affect great revelation upon both the <a href="The_Bear_Inquisition.html">Ordos Ursinquisitus</a> as well as the various subsections.</p>
<p>I have been searching out the truth of the so called <a href="The_Latitant_Macrophobic_Limaciform_Stricture.html">"Great LaMaLi" Stricture</a>, to test whether it is indeed one of the Old Strictures come again.
I am as of yet unsure, given the curious nature of this creature.
As Father Marquette often wrote, <a href="On_The_Eternality_of_Strictures.html">"Strictures may appear in the unlikeliest of places, and in forms and features strange and wonderful to behold. Test, therefore, each one, to see by the purity of your heart and the ringing of your soul whether it be the Eternal come again into time, or it be corruption given flesh and word."</a></p>
<p>As you well know, the Ordos has maintained the Sayings of the Great Fore-Bears for generations, and the wisdom in them has not been lost to darkness. For this reason I believe that although Strictures United considers themselves to have developed the Strictures, they are merely putting into modern tongue the Eternal Stricture Which Was Without End. Perhaps they do this unconsciously, inspired by a deep truth they themselves do not understand, but the Eternal moves in them. And in the case of the LaMaLi, perhaps it is as Father Marquette proclaimed, and the Eternal Stricture has manifest itself in flesh rather than in word.</p>
<p>This is, of course, excluding the accursed and so called <a href="An_Apology_-_from_Strictures_United.html">"13th Stricture,"</a> a perversion of the Eternal for the benefit of mankind, may it be torn asunder by tooth and claw.</p>
<p>I will continue to write as the truth is made clear to me.</p>
<p>Humble in your service, and with great wrath to all corruption,</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Brother Thelemas Tier,
Ursinquisitor,
3rd Order of the Blooded Claw and Penitent of All Mysteries</p></span>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="Harvey_Gardell.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="Earthson27s_Bar_and_Grill.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="An_Apology_-_from_Strictures_United.html">An Apology - from Strictures United</a> | <a href="The_Bear_Inquisition.html">The Bear Inquisition</a> | <a href="The_Latitant_Macrophobic_Limaciform_Stricture.html">The Latitant Macrophobic Limaciform Stricture</a> | <a href="On_The_Eternality_of_Strictures.html">On The Eternality of Strictures</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="The_Bear_Inquisition.html">The Bear Inquisition</a> | <a href="Grampul_Subsection_3.html">Grampul Subsection 3</a> | <a href="Grand_Executor_Jargan.html">Grand Executor Jargan</a></p>
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<p><i>You are the survivors of the Happenstancening, trying to piece together how it was that the Seven Strictures failed the Central Order.</i></p>
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<h1>Happe</h1>
<p>The Happe, a race of diminutive elephant-faced humanoids, were first documented — or first arrived, depending on the source text — along the western coast of the former USSA. Following the first encounters, a number of agnostic mission attempts were made in order to convert the Happe from their apocalyptic, and at times violent, belief in the coming of <a href="The_Happenstancening.html">The Happenstancening</a>, a futuric event of liberation from causality and the possibility of further prophecies and predictions. The sworn enemy of the Happe, is, they say, the “Sequitor.”</p>
<p>The language of the Happe involves clickings of the tongue and wavings of the trunk, and no true speaking, they believe, can take place without at least two speakers, speaking simultaneously, and one <a href="Affirmator.html">Affirmator</a>, who declares, seemingly at random, which speaker is correct with a shouts of “Almond!” and “Zemben!” these words seem to have identical meanings but bring about seemingly unrelated and inconsequential results. </p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Carver Goodmann,<br>
Sub-Sub-Librarian of Teach<br>
Senior Prepositionalist<br>
ARC ZII, Mirror Technician</p></span>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="Larry27s_Conquest.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
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<p>Citations: <a href="Affirmator.html">Affirmator</a> | <a href="The_Happenstancening.html">The Happenstancening</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Affirmator.html">Affirmator</a> | <a href="Earthson27s_Bar_and_Grill.html">Earthson's Bar and Grill</a> | <a href="Existence.html">Existence</a> | <a href="Grampul_Subsection_3.html">Grampul Subsection 3</a> | <a href="Grand_Executor_Jargan.html">Grand Executor Jargan</a> | <a href="Ontological_Abstractions_and_How_to_Beat_Them_to_Death.html">Ontological Abstractions and How to Beat Them to Death</a> | <a href="The_Twelve_Strictures_for_Self_Assured_Safety.html">The Twelve Strictures for Self Assured Safety</a> | <a href="The_Unwritten_Stricture.html">The Unwritten Stricture</a> | <a href="Water-Free_Water.html">Water-Free Water</a></p>
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<p><i>You are the survivors of the Happenstancening, trying to piece together how it was that the Seven Strictures failed the Central Order.</i></p>
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<h1>Harvey Gardell</h1>
<p><i>Wow! What a totally crazy opportunity! Like, if I had more experience in this field I would totally apply! Mr. Harvey Gardell is such an inspirtion, he alone created at least 5 Strictures! I've even gotten to meet one before, <a href="The_Latitant_Macrophobic_Limaciform_Stricture.html">the Great LaMaLi</a>, he always looks so lonely.</i> </p>
<p><i>Anyways, my coworker, Ryan Radford, he once got to like, see a real <a href="Flamenco_Dance-Off.html">flamenco challenge</a>!!! The "once seventh" Stricture was challenged by the "now seventh" Stricture, and like, when he fell, it was such a totally crazy collapse! After 37 hours of pure flamenco dancing, that was it! </i></p>
<p>...</p>
<p><i>Susanna Summers</i></p>
<p><i>ssummers@stricturesunited.gov</i></p>
<p><i>Senior Intern at Strictures United</i></p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p></p></span>
<p><b>To: </b><i>General Staff, Front Desk, Susanna Summers</i></p>
<p><b>From: </b><i>Strictures United</i></p>
<p><b>CC: </b><i>Executive Branch</i></p>
<p><b>Date: </b><i>August 13th, 3014</i></p>
<p><b>Subject: </b><i>New Position Available</i></p>
<p>Attention Staff,</p>
<p>As we all know, our very own Harvey Gardell, is reaching an age due for retirement. Next January, Mr. Gardell, will be approaching his 75th birthday. </p>
<p>Starting now, we will be accepting applications for an assistant to Mr. Gardell to study under, learn from him, and eventually take hold of his current position as Stricture Developer.</p>
<p>Position Details:</p>
<p><b>Stricture Developer</b></p>
<p>The successful candidate will be responsible for creating, evaluating and manipulating designs to meet the needs of our Strictures. We focus on energy-efficient designs, as we know each Stricture is both written law and an embodied life-form that can be challenged to a <a href="Flamenco_Dance-Off.html">flamenco dance-off</a>, so they need to be well designed in order to dance well and protect the standing of those laws. If a Stricture you develop fails to a superior dancer, the stricture is no longer upheld law, and you will be subject to capital punishment. Additionally, the ideal candidate should be open to contributing designs to our online repository of back up blueprints. Such contributions earn commissions in addition to the candidates base salary. If you are looking for an exciting opportunity to join the executive branch of <a href="Strictures_United.html">Strictures United</a>, were interested in meeting with you.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p></p></span>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="Letter_on_the_Great_Corruption.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
<p><a href="Greetings_to_the_High_Chamberlain.html">&#8592; Previous</a></p>
<p>Citations: <a href="Flamenco_Dance-Off.html">Flamenco Dance-Off</a> | <a href="The_Latitant_Macrophobic_Limaciform_Stricture.html">The Latitant Macrophobic Limaciform Stricture</a> | <a href="Strictures_United.html">Strictures United</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Flamenco_Dance-Off.html">Flamenco Dance-Off</a> | <a href="Grampul_Subsection_3.html">Grampul Subsection 3</a> | <a href="Strictures_United_Quarterly_Financial_Update.html">Strictures United Quarterly Financial Update</a></p>
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<p><i>You are the survivors of the Happenstancening, trying to piece together how it was that the Seven Strictures failed the Central Order.</i></p>
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<h1>Journal Entry</h1>
<p><i>Dear Diary,</i></p>
<p><i>Things have gone wacko with the machines. I am so confused, like, what is even happening anymore? People were running around at work for a few days in <a href="White_Lab_Coats.html">white jackets</a> like totally crazy people, and then they like just stopped showing up for work. Things are going very weirdly - like <a href="The_Ministry_of_Not_Screwing_Things_Up.html">one day I'm an intern and the next I'm Vice President</a>?! I'm pretty sure that like the only way that I would have been offered this promotion is if <a href="The_Kappanstancing.html">everyone else died</a>.</i></p>
<p><i>Anyways, I'm like, trying to go through my new desk here and like... WOW. And do you think I don't have to still keep the front desk clean too? Well, I do. Luckily like, I already kept it pretty clean up there but like its a total mess in this office. I thought I was getting somewhere earlier when I found <a href="The_Laws_of_the_Strictures.html">these books</a> but after I arranged volumes 1-6, like, theres not even a volume 8 or 9 anywhere and then theres totally volumes 10-12 and no 13, then theres a 14, but no 15 & 16, and then there's 17-20. On top of all that, its supposed to be a 22 volume collection according to the back. Anyways, I'm not even going to read them because they look old, like, REALLY old, like they don't even have pictures and they're pages are GROSS like YELLOW TORN PAGES EVERYWHERE!</i></p>
<p><i>Either way, Diary, things are like totally nuts-o right now and I can't even.</i></p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>Susanna Summers, Vice President of Strictures United, Front Desk Manager, etc.</p></span>
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<p>Citations: <a href="The_Kappanstancing.html">The Kappanstancing</a> | <a href="The_Laws_of_the_Strictures.html">The Laws of the Strictures</a> | <a href="The_Ministry_of_Not_Screwing_Things_Up.html">The Ministry of Not Screwing Things Up</a> | <a href="White_Lab_Coats.html">White Lab Coats</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="The_Breaching_Stricture.html">The Breaching Stricture</a> | <a href="Grampul_Subsection_3.html">Grampul Subsection 3</a> | <a href="Great_Bear27s_Veins.html">Great Bear's Veins</a> | <a href="The_Happenstancening.html">The Happenstancening</a> | <a href="The_Kappanstancing.html">The Kappanstancing</a> | <a href="The_Laws_of_the_Strictures.html">The Laws of the Strictures</a> | <a href="The_Piercing_Stricture.html">The Piercing Stricture</a></p>
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<p><i>You are the survivors of the Happenstancening, trying to piece together how it was that the Seven Strictures failed the Central Order.</i></p>
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<h1>Larry's Conquest</h1>
<p>Larry's Conquest began prior to the Happenstancening, which may account for ongoing <a href="Reticular_transcendence.html">reticular transcendence</a> of conquestorial elements. Little is known of Larry Wernhauser, for the Happenstancening fundamentally altered the molecular integrity of all extant records. That which we know of his early life we glean from reticular echoes. One such echo (named by famed academic Eudice Eurythian as 'The Atomic Wedgie') can be observed as slowed image by the ruins of the Mitral Iris, wherein one of Larry's famed rivals Big Todd can be seen to this day contributing to the later volatility of the conquest. </p>
<p>The most reliable records for the latter half of the Conquest are oral, as memetic effects are among the mildest results of the Happenstancening. It is known that at one time Larry's empire spanned the known world both east-to-west and top-to-bottom (though not north-to-south). Larry famously restricted airspace privileges to those with a BMI above 26. </p>
<p>One notable song, cross referenced with various oral traditions, holds that Larry's army stopped at the gates of <a href="Unnamed_City.html">Unnamed City</a>, whereupon the local ruler struck a deal; the rulership of the city would be decided in a virtual battleground, mediated by a neutral "dungeon master". Famously, Larry won the fight using virtual commander Typhus Stormbreaker by exploiting the simplifying logic that governs the virtual. He allegedly forced 377 (some records say 369) virtual characters to prepare to pass a stone from the character behind to the character in front, which resolved at instantaneous speed, allowing the stone to reach a speed of approximately 200 mph. Sixty lines of peasants easily decimated the opposing army, filled with veteran cavalry and footmen. </p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>E. Eurythian, Speaker of Truth, formerly Philosopher-King of Lucin's World</p></span>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="Science-Related_Memetic_Disorder.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
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<p>Citations: <a href="Reticular_transcendence.html">Reticular transcendence</a> | <a href="Unnamed_City.html">Unnamed City</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Cathyr_Van_Sacrilege.html">Cathyr Van Sacrilege</a> | <a href="Grampul_Subsection_3.html">Grampul Subsection 3</a> | <a href="Grand_Executor_Jargan.html">Grand Executor Jargan</a> | <a href="The_Ministry_of_Not_Screwing_Things_Up.html">The Ministry of Not Screwing Things Up</a> | <a href="Typhus_Stormbreaker.html">Typhus Stormbreaker</a> | <a href="Unnamed_City.html">Unnamed City</a> | <a href="Wrathrunes.html">Wrathrunes</a></p>
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<p><i>You are the survivors of the Happenstancening, trying to piece together how it was that the Seven Strictures failed the Central Order.</i></p>
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<h1>Letter on the Great Corruption</h1>
<p>Communique 44:// #subsector 5, High Office Chamberlain</p>
<p>AethID 09899-03:/ CalypsoNet</p>
<p>"Guard always your hearts and minds from the influence of corruption and the truth will never betray you."-Sayings of the Fangbearers</p>
<p>From: Ursinquisitor Thelemas Tier</p>
<p>Greetings Blessed Chamberlain of All Fury,</p>
<p>I have further news of the events unfolding regarding the rebirth of the Eternal Strictures and the destruction of the <a href="The_Happenstancening.html">Happenstanceing</a>. In one of my travels I was momentarily distracted from my meditative navigation by a strange ripple in the Aether. It appears that a certain human female monastery is located on an intersection of the <a href="Great_Bear27s_Veins.html">Great Bear's Veins</a> and focuses the power of that ancient confluence to a distracting degree.</p>
<p>Oweing to the distraction and my broken trance state, I exited the Aether at highspeed above this monastery where I was confronted by a certain Sister Avacillata. She appears to have mistaken the last traces of my Wrathtrance for hostility, as she approached with a raised voice and firearm. I quickly disabled her with a single motion of the Bone Way and after some time we were able to speak together more peacefully.</p>
<p>According to the good Sister, it appears that the calamity that we have heard of did indeed strike humanity some two years previous, though the Ordus was, as you know, spared. Perhaps it is due to the Ordus having sworn off all use and knowledge of the ancient Scientific art, so there was no path for the corruption to flow into us.</p>
<p>I know not. That the calamity occurred at all, however concerns me greatly, in that it may imply--and I say this knowing full well the consequences of my words--a failure of the Great Strictures. If as the humans claim, their strictures suppressed the <a href="Science-Related_Memetic_Disorder.html">Scientific Corruption</a> from making itself known in them, for the calamity to occur may suggest the Eternal Strictures at the root of these human confabulations, perhaps flickered.</p>
<p>If this is heresy I pray absolve me of the corruption brought on by speaking with the human Sister, but I can not ignore any threat to The Ordus or the Eternal by which we roar and rage and have our being.</p>
<p>Humble in your service, and with great wrath to all corruption,</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p> Brother Thelemas Tier,
Ursinquisitor,
3rd Order of the Blooded Claw and Penitent of All Mysteries</p></span>
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<p>Citations: <a href="Great_Bear27s_Veins.html">Great Bear's Veins</a> | <a href="The_Happenstancening.html">The Happenstancening</a> | <a href="Science-Related_Memetic_Disorder.html">Science-Related Memetic Disorder</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="The_Bear_Inquisition.html">The Bear Inquisition</a> | <a href="Grampul_Subsection_3.html">Grampul Subsection 3</a> | <a href="Great_Bear27s_Veins.html">Great Bear's Veins</a> | <a href="The_Happenstancening.html">The Happenstancening</a></p>
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<p><i>You are the survivors of the Happenstancening, trying to piece together how it was that the Seven Strictures failed the Central Order.</i></p>
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<h1>Logomancy</h1>
<p>Developed by EGI in 2029, <b>logomancy</b> has since become a matter of speculation and General Intrigue. </p>
<p>Following Vandal Von Doomsdays <a href="Strictures_United_Quarterly_Financial_Update.html">discovery of the Terminal Void</a> in 2028, he wrote the <i>Stricturnomicon</i>, providing a detailed account of <a href="Science-Related_Memetic_Disorder.html">"the blessing"</a> of the <a href="The_Unwritten_Stricture.html">"nameless force"</a>. The <i>Stricturnomicon</i> was set into seven sections, each of which was divided into fifty-three sub-sections, separated into eighteen "letters," most of which were love letters written to a "Polly" who claimed she seduced <a href="Satan.html">"the devil hisself"</a>. While this "Polly" since been surpassed by <a href="The_Unwritten_Stricture.html">Heimrond Von Nazi III</a>, she maintained her unbounded sapience. Mystically impregnated by this "Polly," Vandal Von Doomsday returned to "the surface." Seeing the book as worth saving, but also worth being unread, the Scriptorium built much of its library from copies of the book. It is estimated that at least 9,999,999,999&#123;error&#125; volumes went into the bricks. In 2029 EGI acquired the remaining two legible copies of the <i>Stricturnomicon</i> and developed the science of <b>logomancy</b> from the dark wisdom therein. </p>
<p>Since 2029, the methods of <b>logomancy</b> have changed, possibly due to the general incoherency of Vandal Von Doomsday's text and the <a href="The_Fellowship_of_the_Living_Word.html">madness</a> usually resulting from he former style. This madness can be evaded by being a library. Most modern <b>logomancy</b> is performed via <a href="Flamenco_Dance-Off.html">flamenco dancing</a>. Oddly enough, the algorithmic method used for this is directly born of--literally <i>birthed by</i>--<a href="Strictures_United_Quarterly_Financial_Update.html">the blessing</a>. Further, according to <a href="Necesscitas_CruciC481tC4AB_NovC4AB.html">the Ursinquisitors</a>, the Thirteenth Stricture was itself created by the "use" of <a href="White_Lab_Coats.html">man scientists</a>. <a href="On_The_Eternality_of_Strictures.html"><b>Logomancy</b> can not pass through tin foil</a> according to <a href="White_Lab_Coats.html">Carnelian's memos</a>.</p>
<p>According to General Intruigue, the bastard father of Vandal Von Doomsday, <b>Logomancy</b> is "both the mother and child of the Strictures." This is worth considering.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>
Carver Goodmann,<br>
Sub-Sub-Librarian of Teach<br>
Senior Prepositionalist<br>
ARC ZII, Mirror Technician<br>
Sub-Ambibeliever</p></span>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="Ontological_Abstractions_and_How_to_Beat_Them_to_Death.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
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<p>Citations: <a href="The_Fellowship_of_the_Living_Word.html">The Fellowship of the Living Word</a> | <a href="Flamenco_Dance-Off.html">Flamenco Dance-Off</a> | <a href="Necesscitas_CruciC481tC4AB_NovC4AB.html">Necesscitas Cruciātī Novī</a> | <a href="On_The_Eternality_of_Strictures.html">On The Eternality of Strictures</a> | <a href="Satan.html">Satan</a> | <a href="Science-Related_Memetic_Disorder.html">Science-Related Memetic Disorder</a> | <a href="Strictures_United_Quarterly_Financial_Update.html">Strictures United Quarterly Financial Update</a> | <a href="The_Unwritten_Stricture.html">The Unwritten Stricture</a> | <a href="White_Lab_Coats.html">White Lab Coats</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="The_Fellowship_of_the_Living_Word.html">The Fellowship of the Living Word</a> | <a href="Flamenco_Dance-Off.html">Flamenco Dance-Off</a> | <a href="Necesscitas_CruciC481tC4AB_NovC4AB.html">Necesscitas Cruciātī Novī</a> | <a href="On_The_Eternality_of_Strictures.html">On The Eternality of Strictures</a> | <a href="Satan.html">Satan</a> | <a href="Strictures_United_Quarterly_Financial_Update.html">Strictures United Quarterly Financial Update</a> | <a href="White_Lab_Coats.html">White Lab Coats</a></p>
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<p><i>You are the survivors of the Happenstancening, trying to piece together how it was that the Seven Strictures failed the Central Order.</i></p>
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<h1>Missing Files</h1>
<p><b>To: </b><i>General Staff, Front Desk</i></p>
<p><b>From: </b><i>Susanna Summers</i></p>
<p><b>CC: </b><i>Executive Branch</i></p>
<p><b>Date: </b><i>August 24th, 3014</i></p>
<p><b>Subject: </b><i>Missing Files?</i></p>
<p>Heyy!</p>
<p>So, like, I have been going through my new desk here as <a href="The_Ministry_of_Not_Screwing_Things_Up.html">Vice President of Strictures United</a> and I like, can not figure out where in the the world all these missing files are at! I have looked in like all the drawers and cupboards, looked high and low, and I've like even reached out to the Administrative Department and sent an additional inquiry to <a href="Satan.html">Human Resources</a> but he totally hasn't responded yet either. WTH! I have absolutely nothing on what happened to the old employees or Volumes 13, 15, 16, 21, and 22 of the <a href="The_Laws_of_the_Strictures.html">The Laws of the Strictures</a> books! I cannot figure out what I am doing here - can someone like pretty please please please help me?! </p>
<p>On another note, it seems that due to ongoing <a href="Reticular_transcendence.html">reticular transcendence</a> there will be a temporary closure of <a href="Earthson27s_Bar_and_Grill.html">Earthson's Bar and Grill</a> which is a little dissapointing because after days like this - I like totally could use a drink with the girls!</p>
<p>Susanna Summers</p>
<p>ssummers@stricturesunited.gov</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>Susanna Summers - Vice President of Strictures United, Front Desk Manager, etc.</p></span>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="The_Piercing_Stricture.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
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<p>Citations: <a href="Earthson27s_Bar_and_Grill.html">Earthson's Bar and Grill</a> | <a href="The_Laws_of_the_Strictures.html">The Laws of the Strictures</a> | <a href="The_Ministry_of_Not_Screwing_Things_Up.html">The Ministry of Not Screwing Things Up</a> | <a href="Reticular_transcendence.html">Reticular transcendence</a> | <a href="Satan.html">Satan</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Grampul_Subsection_3.html">Grampul Subsection 3</a> | <a href="The_Kappanstancing.html">The Kappanstancing</a> | <a href="The_Laws_of_the_Strictures.html">The Laws of the Strictures</a> | <a href="Reticular_transcendence.html">Reticular transcendence</a> | <a href="Satan.html">Satan</a></p>
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<p><i>You are the survivors of the Happenstancening, trying to piece together how it was that the Seven Strictures failed the Central Order.</i></p>
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<h1>Necesscitas Cruciātī Novī</h1>
<p>Communique 48:// #subsector 5, High Office Chamberlain</p>
<p>AethID 23449-84:/ CalypsoNet</p>
<p>"Take heed always to tear out corruption wherever it may spring up, for if you should not, and it take root, the Wrathbears will descend in a tide of death and fury to wash away the stain of heresy with the blood of the unworthy." Greater Chatechism of Wrath, Author Unknown</p>
<p>From: Ursinquisitor Thelemas Tier</p>
<p>Greetings Blessed Chamberlain of All Fury,</p>
<p>I have expressed my concern in the past several missives regarding the supposed "creation" of Strictures and the attitude of rampant carelessness expressed by many in this portion of the Aetherverse. </p>
<p>I have just now discovered things are far worse than I could have imagined, and as such must make this formal request.</p>
<p>In recent weeks the organization and Planet-city known as the Central Order has continued in their bullheaded attempts to maximize their own profitability at the expense of Reality itself, in service of their cold <a href="Religion_28disambiguation29.html">religion</a> of greed. I have previously mentioned the so called <a href="An_Apology_-_from_Strictures_United.html">"Thirteenth Stricture"</a>, but it was unknown to me until this time that the Central Order has created this perverse <a href="Logomancy.html">amalgamation of Science and The Eternal</a> by use of <a href="White_Lab_Coats.html">Soul-Wounded Scientists</a>.</p>
<p>If this were the extent of their crimes, I would still see fit to make the request which is forthcoming, but to the sorrow of all, there is yet more.</p>
<p>It has come to my attention, that beyond some paltry--however heretical and abominable it may be--and deliberate attempt to bend the Eternal Strictures to their own whims, the Central Order has been a source of Aetheric Corruption, the <a href="Strictures_United.html">black smoke of foulness</a> wafting from it out into the void, kept hidden by mankind to some nefarious end. The Central Order itself has in fact become an abomination, a rotting pustule in the core of the Aetherverse. Perhaps it is for this reason that the Aether has become <a href="The_Wanderway.html">warped in certain places</a> </p>
<p>On account of these dreadful tidings, and with a heavy heart I therefore make this request:</p>
<p>Blessed High Chamberlain of All Fury, Wrath of the Eternal, Bloodclaw and Render of Deceit, </p>
<p>Your servant, Brother Thelemas Tier, Ursinquisitor, 3rd Order of the Blooded Claw and Penitent of All Mysteries does request formally and with sober mind and spirit, a Great Crusade. Let the fury of the Ursinquisitus rain down upon the unrighteous, let the blood of the unworthy wash away the stink of heresy from mankind, let the rot and corruption of the Central Order be purged in a great conflagration as the Wrathbears descend to roar and destroy and bring woe to those who would conceal abomination in their midst and covet it to flourish.</p>
<p>Let a Cruciātus Novus, a new crusade, be formed to devour all that is unholy and to leave the ashes of purification in its wake. I request this, as such rage wells up in me as is mete and right, for the anger of the Eternal roars through me at the desecration of the Aetherverse.</p>
<p>I remain humble in your service, and with great wrath to all corruption,</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>Brother Thelemas Tier, Ursinquisitor, 3rd Order of the Blooded Claw and Penitent of All Mysteries, Boneroarer of the 5th Great Crusade.</p></span>
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<p style="float:right"><a href="Religion_28disambiguation29.html">Next &#8594;</a></p>
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<p>Citations: <a href="An_Apology_-_from_Strictures_United.html">An Apology - from Strictures United</a> | <a href="Logomancy.html">Logomancy</a> | <a href="Religion_28disambiguation29.html">Religion (disambiguation)</a> | <a href="Strictures_United.html">Strictures United</a> | <a href="The_Wanderway.html">The Wanderway</a> | <a href="White_Lab_Coats.html">White Lab Coats</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="The_Breaching_Stricture.html">The Breaching Stricture</a> | <a href="Flamenco_Dance-Off.html">Flamenco Dance-Off</a> | <a href="Grampul_Subsection_3.html">Grampul Subsection 3</a> | <a href="Great_Bear27s_Veins.html">Great Bear's Veins</a> | <a href="Logomancy.html">Logomancy</a></p>
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<p><i>You are the survivors of the Happenstancening, trying to piece together how it was that the Seven Strictures failed the Central Order.</i></p>
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<h1>On The Eternality of Strictures</h1>
<p><a href="Earthson27s_Bar_and_Grill.html">Earthson's Bar and Grill</a> is the only place of any safety left as <a href="Strictures_United.html">Strictures United</a> has raided my <a href="White_Lab_Coats.html">apartment</a> knowing that I knew too much and therefore attempting to take me out of the picture but the resistance movement let me know in a final communique provided by the logo on a SUmmer Vacation Planning pamphlet* warning me of an oncoming SUrprise raid on my apartment. I feel oh so very sorry for whoever was first through the door and highly doubt they remember what year it is.^ I sit in the grill with closed doors open to all with a recent covering of tin foil to keep the thrice damned <a href="Logomancy.html">logomancers</a> <a href="White_Lab_Coats.html">employed by SU</a>. They cannot get us here so long as Earthson remains and the man remains vigilant against all forces of man and bear and infernal being.</p>
<p>After covering the bar with tin foil and unplugging all computer terminals and phone outlets to ensure we would not be spied upon I had some time to pass and I looked at the various books and tomes stored in the rooms of the bar and after passing over archived copies of <a href="Strictures_United_Quarterly_Financial_Update.html">SU Quarterly Reports</a> and Liber Ivonis and a compendium of non-euclidean beer brewing techniques and a very strange set of scholarly reports circling around some apocalypse in another dimension and time I picked up a strange volume <i>On the Eternality of the Strictures</i> which was so completely and utterly boring that it fascinated and entertained me to no end.</p>
<p>The <a href="Grand_Executor_Jargan.html">first page</a> contained some small amount of information on the Strictures including the process by which one may bind the <a href="Strictures_United_Quarterly_Financial_Update.html">abstract to the concrete</a>. However after the first page` it launches into a manifesto of causal-breaking party crashing parties and I will say <a href="Grand_Executor_Jargan.html">Jargan</a> certainly knows how to throw a party and as the Grand Executor of such he has not only launched many parties but has been known to <i>literally</i> crash parties which has resulted in numerous floating stations filled with party-goers and business executives having a very untimely end and he even managed to sneak out of and therefore into a <a href="D.E.A.T.H.S.T.A.R..html">top secret strictures meeting</a>. From reading through his accomplishments and MO and general goal it is obvious and clear and beyond a doubt that he was involved in the collapse of the <a href="The_Breaching_Stricture.html">Breaching Stricture</a> and <a href="Seirapolis.html">Seirapolis</a> because after all what could ever possibly be a greater crash than this and what <a href="Grand_Executor_Jargan.html">sort of parties could he throw</a> in the chaos that ensued?</p>
<p>Some tin foil just got torn by that odd PI who has a bump on his head so I must repair the damage before it's too late.</p>
<hr><span class="signature"><p>REDACTED</p></span>
<p>*The method of encoding consisted simply in removing all letters that were not part of the intended message.</p>
<p>^To be fair, neither does anyone else.</p>
<p>`The pages are approximately three feet by two feet, so one page does contain quite a bit of information.</p>
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<p>Citations: <a href="The_Breaching_Stricture.html">The Breaching Stricture</a> | <a href="D.E.A.T.H.S.T.A.R..html">D.E.A.T.H.S.T.A.R.</a> | <a href="Earthson27s_Bar_and_Grill.html">Earthson's Bar and Grill</a> | <a href="Grand_Executor_Jargan.html">Grand Executor Jargan</a> | <a href="Logomancy.html">Logomancy</a> | <a href="Seirapolis.html">Seirapolis</a> | <a href="Strictures_United.html">Strictures United</a> | <a href="Strictures_United_Quarterly_Financial_Update.html">Strictures United Quarterly Financial Update</a> | <a href="White_Lab_Coats.html">White Lab Coats</a></p>
<p>Cited by: <a href="Grand_Executor_Jargan.html">Grand Executor Jargan</a> | <a href="Greetings_to_the_High_Chamberlain.html">Greetings to the High Chamberlain</a> | <a href="Logomancy.html">Logomancy</a></p>
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